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Keeping Things in Perspective

YYW
Posts: 36,426
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10/12/2015 1:02:02 AM
Posted: 1 year ago
This note will serve as a reminder of some things I said last night, on 10/10/15.

As each of you move through your lives, there will be trial and tribulation. Your life will feel like it's going off course, if not totally derailed from time to time. There will be moments where you feel like you have hit the lowest point that you have ever been at. Moments will pass where you may even begin to question if achieving anything meaningful with your life is within your capacity.

Yet, each one of you has something to offer this world, that is unique and valuable. I know this because I have gotten to know all of you, dozens over a long period of time, and many yet on a very deep level. It is on that basis that I can say, confidently, that each and every one of you has the capacity to do great and meaningful things. However, it is important to remember that what counts for great and meaningful is not objectively defined. Our lives only have the meaning that we give them, and our lives have value to the extent that we pursue our goals. Notice that I said "pursue" not "accomplish." Accomplishment is important, but the work and effort towards them is more so, because that process is how we learn.

I have never met a successful person who has not failed more times than he or she succeeded, and no person is born great. We are the product of two things: our choices, as they are made within the context in which we exist, and the context in which we exist that defines the scope of those choices. What we all must realize and reconcile with is the fact that the choices we make, for better or worse, define the next context in which we will be making the next set of choices. Perhaps we succeed and advance. Perhaps we fail and fall back. No mater what happens, what matters most, and indeed the very definition of our character, is whether we do everything in our power to keep moving forward.

In the course of moving forward, there are three things that we've got to keep in mind: (1) where we've been; (2) where we are now; and (3) where we're going. Where we've been is the sum of our experiences; it is everything that has happened in our lives up until this moment. Every success and every failure. Every triumph and every sorrow. All the wonderful moments we have shared with the people we love, and who care about us, and all the times that we have spent in anger at those who have intentionally or unintentionally hurt us. Where we are now is the context in which we presently find ourselves, and that context defines our choices. Where we are going will be the result of the choices we make in the present.

The choices we make which lead us toward greatness, happiness and accomplishment are the daily tasks, more often than not, which we are responsible for. Only once a person has proven that they can handle the little things, will they be given the chance to handle bigger things. That's just how the world works, which is why the little choices we make now --even if they entail doing boring or unpleasant things-- will govern where we are in one, five and ten years from now.

Realize, though, that it is never too late to start making the right choices and not make the wrong ones. None of you are so old that you have ruined your lives. I can give you examples of people who have ruined their lives. None of you fall into that category of people. The implication is that the only ones who fail, are those who never try to improve, and no matter what has happened in the past, you can make your life better.

What you have to do is figure out what the choices are before. Maybe your choices are to study, or not study. To go to class, or not to go to class. To do your homework, or not to do your homework. To reach out to a teacher for help when you need it, or suffer in silence. Failure and success both exist on the same plane of choice, but at different ends of the spectrum.

What you need not to do, in the course of this process, is ask yourself where you stand relative to other people, because that does not matter. The only thing that matters is if you are the kind of person that you want to be. That requires, however, that you figure out what kind of person you want to be. Even if you don't have a solid idea, do the best you can to get a working model of your ideal self, and strive to make yourself into that person. Who that person is, and what they look like, and what they do will change over time as you mature, your values change and you reach different stages in life. I know that has certainly been true for myself; but what matters is that you never stop trying, and that you try your best in everything that you do.
Tsar of DDO
FourTrouble
Posts: 12,777
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10/12/2015 2:37:18 AM
Posted: 1 year ago
At 10/12/2015 1:02:02 AM, YYW wrote:
This note will serve as a reminder of some things I said last night, on 10/10/15.

As each of you move through your lives, there will be trial and tribulation. Your life will feel like it's going off course, if not totally derailed from time to time. There will be moments where you feel like you have hit the lowest point that you have ever been at. Moments will pass where you may even begin to question if achieving anything meaningful with your life is within your capacity.

Yet, each one of you has something to offer this world, that is unique and valuable. I know this because I have gotten to know all of you, dozens over a long period of time, and many yet on a very deep level. It is on that basis that I can say, confidently, that each and every one of you has the capacity to do great and meaningful things. However, it is important to remember that what counts for great and meaningful is not objectively defined. Our lives only have the meaning that we give them, and our lives have value to the extent that we pursue our goals. Notice that I said "pursue" not "accomplish." Accomplishment is important, but the work and effort towards them is more so, because that process is how we learn.

I have never met a successful person who has not failed more times than he or she succeeded, and no person is born great. We are the product of two things: our choices, as they are made within the context in which we exist, and the context in which we exist that defines the scope of those choices. What we all must realize and reconcile with is the fact that the choices we make, for better or worse, define the next context in which we will be making the next set of choices. Perhaps we succeed and advance. Perhaps we fail and fall back. No mater what happens, what matters most, and indeed the very definition of our character, is whether we do everything in our power to keep moving forward.

In the course of moving forward, there are three things that we've got to keep in mind: (1) where we've been; (2) where we are now; and (3) where we're going. Where we've been is the sum of our experiences; it is everything that has happened in our lives up until this moment. Every success and every failure. Every triumph and every sorrow. All the wonderful moments we have shared with the people we love, and who care about us, and all the times that we have spent in anger at those who have intentionally or unintentionally hurt us. Where we are now is the context in which we presently find ourselves, and that context defines our choices. Where we are going will be the result of the choices we make in the present.

The choices we make which lead us toward greatness, happiness and accomplishment are the daily tasks, more often than not, which we are responsible for. Only once a person has proven that they can handle the little things, will they be given the chance to handle bigger things. That's just how the world works, which is why the little choices we make now --even if they entail doing boring or unpleasant things-- will govern where we are in one, five and ten years from now.

Realize, though, that it is never too late to start making the right choices and not make the wrong ones. None of you are so old that you have ruined your lives. I can give you examples of people who have ruined their lives. None of you fall into that category of people. The implication is that the only ones who fail, are those who never try to improve, and no matter what has happened in the past, you can make your life better.

What you have to do is figure out what the choices are before. Maybe your choices are to study, or not study. To go to class, or not to go to class. To do your homework, or not to do your homework. To reach out to a teacher for help when you need it, or suffer in silence. Failure and success both exist on the same plane of choice, but at different ends of the spectrum.

What you need not to do, in the course of this process, is ask yourself where you stand relative to other people, because that does not matter. The only thing that matters is if you are the kind of person that you want to be. That requires, however, that you figure out what kind of person you want to be. Even if you don't have a solid idea, do the best you can to get a working model of your ideal self, and strive to make yourself into that person. Who that person is, and what they look like, and what they do will change over time as you mature, your values change and you reach different stages in life. I know that has certainly been true for myself; but what matters is that you never stop trying, and that you try your best in everything that you do.

Thanks for writing this up. I really wanted to be at the hangout yesterday. And I'm hoping you do another soon. I'm actually going through some tough sh!t with my life at the moment, so I truly value your sensitivity to the struggle of life and the time you put into writing up these sorts of posts. The idea of focusing on the struggle to be who you want to be rather than the result is so simple yet so powerful. It's definitely something I've been trying to let guide my life for years. Of course, the challenge is that you never become that person because that ideal self is constantly changing.
YYW
Posts: 36,426
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10/12/2015 2:48:22 AM
Posted: 1 year ago
At 10/12/2015 2:37:18 AM, FourTrouble wrote:
Thanks for writing this up. I really wanted to be at the hangout yesterday. And I'm hoping you do another soon. I'm actually going through some tough sh!t with my life at the moment, so I truly value your sensitivity to the struggle of life and the time you put into writing up these sorts of posts. The idea of focusing on the struggle to be who you want to be rather than the result is so simple yet so powerful. It's definitely something I've been trying to let guide my life for years. Of course, the challenge is that you never become that person because that ideal self is constantly changing.

Sure thing. I hope it helps.
Tsar of DDO
Sapphique
Posts: 4,119
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10/13/2015 2:53:13 AM
Posted: 1 year ago
At 10/12/2015 1:02:02 AM, YYW wrote:

Thanks for this. I also hit a low point pretty recently and it was/is pretty hard. Added to favorites (idk if people even use that function lol).
DDO Beginners' Mafia Moderator -- PM me if you'd like to learn how to play mafia!

"We wondered what happiness would look like if we could give it a physical form...the shape of happiness might resemble glass...even though you don't usually notice it, it's still definitely there. You merely have to change your point of view slightly, and then that glass will sparkle when it reflects the light. I doubt that anything else could argue its own existence more eloquently." ~Lelouch
YYW
Posts: 36,426
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10/13/2015 2:56:46 AM
Posted: 1 year ago
At 10/13/2015 2:53:13 AM, Sapphique wrote:
At 10/12/2015 1:02:02 AM, YYW wrote:

Thanks for this. I also hit a low point pretty recently and it was/is pretty hard. Added to favorites (idk if people even use that function lol).

Cheers ;)
Tsar of DDO
1harderthanyouthink
Posts: 13,107
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10/13/2015 3:27:17 AM
Posted: 1 year ago
At 10/13/2015 2:53:13 AM, Sapphique wrote:
At 10/12/2015 1:02:02 AM, YYW wrote:
Added to favorites (idk if people even use that function lol).

I think I used it on accident a few times.
"It's awfully considerate of you to think of me here,
And I'm much obliged to you for making it clear - that I'm not here."

-Syd Barrett

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Sapphique
Posts: 4,119
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10/13/2015 3:30:49 AM
Posted: 1 year ago
At 10/13/2015 3:27:17 AM, 1harderthanyouthink wrote:
I think I used it on accident a few times.

Great. Just me then XD
DDO Beginners' Mafia Moderator -- PM me if you'd like to learn how to play mafia!

"We wondered what happiness would look like if we could give it a physical form...the shape of happiness might resemble glass...even though you don't usually notice it, it's still definitely there. You merely have to change your point of view slightly, and then that glass will sparkle when it reflects the light. I doubt that anything else could argue its own existence more eloquently." ~Lelouch
1harderthanyouthink
Posts: 13,107
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10/13/2015 3:58:25 AM
Posted: 1 year ago
At 10/13/2015 3:30:49 AM, Sapphique wrote:
At 10/13/2015 3:27:17 AM, 1harderthanyouthink wrote:
I think I used it on accident a few times.

Great. Just me then XD

I guess it could be useful.
"It's awfully considerate of you to think of me here,
And I'm much obliged to you for making it clear - that I'm not here."

-Syd Barrett

DDO Risk King
bsh1
Posts: 27,504
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10/13/2015 11:25:53 PM
Posted: 1 year ago
At 10/13/2015 3:58:25 AM, 1harderthanyouthink wrote:
At 10/13/2015 3:30:49 AM, Sapphique wrote:
At 10/13/2015 3:27:17 AM, 1harderthanyouthink wrote:
I think I used it on accident a few times.

Great. Just me then XD

I guess it could be useful.

Lol..."I guess..."
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ESocialBookworm
Posts: 14,373
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10/14/2015 1:45:23 PM
Posted: 1 year ago
What has this world come to? I didn't learn a new word from YYW's rant? D:
Solonkr~
I don't care about whether an ideology is "necessary" or not,
I care about how to solve problems,
which is what everyone else should also care about.

Ken~
In essence, the world is fucked up and you can either ignore it, become cynical or bitter about it.

Me~
"BAILEY + SOLON = SAILEY
MY SHIP SAILEY MUST SAIL"

SCREW THAT SHIZ #BANNIE = BAILEY & ANNIE

P.S. Shipped Sailey before it was cannon bitches.
YYW
Posts: 36,426
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10/14/2015 11:46:56 PM
Posted: 1 year ago
At 10/14/2015 1:45:23 PM, ESocialBookworm wrote:
What has this world come to? I didn't learn a new word from YYW's rant? D:

Sometimes keeping things clear and concise is to everyone's benefit.
Tsar of DDO