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My two ex lovers are wed

thett3
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2/19/2016 11:01:56 PM
Posted: 9 months ago
I told this story to Bossy over Facebook yesterday and he thought it was hilarious. Since I feel like I've probably alienated a lot of people with my incessant bullying of members regarding Trump, so here is my attempt to shore up my softer side. Plus I'm procrastinating on homework.

A few of you may know elements of this story from talking to me but here is the sheer, unadulterated version.

Okay. So growing up I had a really close friend who we will call Brett. Brett lived next door to this other guy, let's call him Noah. One day in 7th or 8th grade I went over the Bretts house to spend the night, but when I arrive there he immediately takes us to Noah's house, where we went into Noah's attic. His attic is the coolest attic I've ever seen, about the size of a three room flat, it was crazy.

Anybody who has been inside a middle school boys locker room knows that they do some very....homoerotic things in there, because middle school boys are weird. In the attic there were two mattresses standing upright in the shape of an upside down V. Brett and Noah took their shirts off, went in between the mattresses, and began to hump each other vigorously and after that it was sheer madness. The two of them were taking turns slamming their clothed crotch into the backside of the other while moaning in fake (?) pleasure, it was an incredibly weird thing to do but peer pressure made me join in. Plus it was just a joke...

They did other things as well, like going under a blanket together. I remember vividly watching the blanket shift up and down, emitting strange noises, and jumping on it and trying to join in but it just wasn't the same. Noah and Brett also stripped down to their underwear, which I refused to do, and they even tried to scissor each other. One time Noah's parents came up to see what was going on and they barely managed to break away and pull on their clothes before being interrogated.

We did things like that all night, and again the next time I spent the night, and the next time. My friends named them the "let's pretend to be gay" slumber parties.

This was in like 8th grade and I lost contact with both of them pretty soon after that. Flash forward 3 years, the summer after my Sophomore year of High School. I was dating this girl, lets call her Allie, but eventually things fell apart and I didn't hear anything from her for many years, but now word has reached me that she has married...Noah.

Two of my ex lovers just got married. And the most hilarious thing: I remember telling her this story, but I didn't say any names because I assumed she wouldn't have know them. I wonder if she has any idea...

Oh, and Brett is actually gay.
DDO Vice President

#StandwithBossy

#UnbanTheMadman

#BetOnThett

"Don't quote me, ever." -Max

"My name is max. I'm not a big fan of slacks"- Max rapping

"Walmart should have the opportunity to bribe a politician to it's agenda" -Max

"Thett, you're really good at convincing people you're a decent person"-tulle

"You fit the character of Regina George quite nicely"- Sam

: At 11/12/2016 11:49:40 PM, Raisor wrote:
: thett was right
Illegalcombatant
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2/20/2016 1:16:44 PM
Posted: 9 months ago
So the guy who enjoy humping other dudes turned out to be gay........................this is like the worst twist ending every.
"Seems like another attempt to insert God into areas our knowledge has yet to penetrate. You figure God would be bigger than the gaps of our ignorance." Drafterman 19/5/12
lannan13
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2/20/2016 3:49:04 PM
Posted: 9 months ago
Thanks Trump.
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n7
Posts: 1,360
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2/20/2016 11:17:47 PM
Posted: 9 months ago
At 2/19/2016 11:01:56 PM, thett3 wrote:
I told this story to Bossy over Facebook yesterday and he thought it was hilarious. Since I feel like I've probably alienated a lot of people with my incessant bullying of members regarding Trump, so here is my attempt to shore up my softer side. Plus I'm procrastinating on homework.

A few of you may know elements of this story from talking to me but here is the sheer, unadulterated version.

Okay. So growing up I had a really close friend who we will call Brett. Brett lived next door to this other guy, let's call him Noah. One day in 7th or 8th grade I went over the Bretts house to spend the night, but when I arrive there he immediately takes us to Noah's house, where we went into Noah's attic. His attic is the coolest attic I've ever seen, about the size of a three room flat, it was crazy.

Anybody who has been inside a middle school boys locker room knows that they do some very....homoerotic things in there, because middle school boys are weird. In the attic there were two mattresses standing upright in the shape of an upside down V. Brett and Noah took their shirts off, went in between the mattresses, and began to hump each other vigorously and after that it was sheer madness. The two of them were taking turns slamming their clothed crotch into the backside of the other while moaning in fake (?) pleasure, it was an incredibly weird thing to do but peer pressure made me join in. Plus it was just a joke...

This line reminds me of this story.

https://i.imgur.com...
They did other things as well, like going under a blanket together. I remember vividly watching the blanket shift up and down, emitting strange noises, and jumping on it and trying to join in but it just wasn't the same. Noah and Brett also stripped down to their underwear, which I refused to do, and they even tried to scissor each other. One time Noah's parents came up to see what was going on and they barely managed to break away and pull on their clothes before being interrogated.

We did things like that all night, and again the next time I spent the night, and the next time. My friends named them the "let's pretend to be gay" slumber parties.

This was in like 8th grade and I lost contact with both of them pretty soon after that. Flash forward 3 years, the summer after my Sophomore year of High School. I was dating this girl, lets call her Allie, but eventually things fell apart and I didn't hear anything from her for many years, but now word has reached me that she has married...Noah.

Two of my ex lovers just got married. And the most hilarious thing: I remember telling her this story, but I didn't say any names because I assumed she wouldn't have know them. I wonder if she has any idea...

Oh, and Brett is actually gay.
404 coherent debate topic not found. Please restart the debate with clear resolution.


Uphold Marxist-Leninist-Maoist-Sargonist-n7ism.
ESocialBookworm
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2/21/2016 8:22:05 PM
Posted: 9 months ago
At 2/19/2016 11:01:56 PM, thett3 wrote:
Are you bi?
Solonkr~
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I care about how to solve problems,
which is what everyone else should also care about.

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In essence, the world is fucked up and you can either ignore it, become cynical or bitter about it.

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"BAILEY + SOLON = SAILEY
MY SHIP SAILEY MUST SAIL"

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P.S. Shipped Sailey before it was cannon bitches.
thett3
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2/21/2016 9:21:27 PM
Posted: 9 months ago
At 2/21/2016 8:22:05 PM, ESocialBookworm wrote:
At 2/19/2016 11:01:56 PM, thett3 wrote:
Are you bi?

No.
DDO Vice President

#StandwithBossy

#UnbanTheMadman

#BetOnThett

"Don't quote me, ever." -Max

"My name is max. I'm not a big fan of slacks"- Max rapping

"Walmart should have the opportunity to bribe a politician to it's agenda" -Max

"Thett, you're really good at convincing people you're a decent person"-tulle

"You fit the character of Regina George quite nicely"- Sam

: At 11/12/2016 11:49:40 PM, Raisor wrote:
: thett was right
bsh1
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2/21/2016 9:22:20 PM
Posted: 9 months ago
At 2/21/2016 8:22:05 PM, ESocialBookworm wrote:
At 2/19/2016 11:01:56 PM, thett3 wrote:
Are you bi?

Rofl.
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I'm a Bish.


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ESocialBookworm
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2/22/2016 1:47:36 AM
Posted: 9 months ago
At 2/21/2016 9:21:27 PM, thett3 wrote:
At 2/21/2016 8:22:05 PM, ESocialBookworm wrote:
At 2/19/2016 11:01:56 PM, thett3 wrote:
Are you bi?

No.

Okies. ;)
Solonkr~
I don't care about whether an ideology is "necessary" or not,
I care about how to solve problems,
which is what everyone else should also care about.

Ken~
In essence, the world is fucked up and you can either ignore it, become cynical or bitter about it.

Me~
"BAILEY + SOLON = SAILEY
MY SHIP SAILEY MUST SAIL"

SCREW THAT SHIZ #BANNIE = BAILEY & ANNIE

P.S. Shipped Sailey before it was cannon bitches.
Vaarka
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2/22/2016 1:52:22 AM
Posted: 9 months ago
At 2/19/2016 11:01:56 PM, thett3 wrote:
I told this story to Bossy over Facebook yesterday and he thought it was hilarious. Since I feel like I've probably alienated a lot of people with my incessant bullying of members regarding Trump, so here is my attempt to shore up my softer side. Plus I'm procrastinating on homework.

A few of you may know elements of this story from talking to me but here is the sheer, unadulterated version.

Okay. So growing up I had a really close friend who we will call Brett. Brett lived next door to this other guy, let's call him Noah. One day in 7th or 8th grade I went over the Bretts house to spend the night, but when I arrive there he immediately takes us to Noah's house, where we went into Noah's attic. His attic is the coolest attic I've ever seen, about the size of a three room flat, it was crazy.

Anybody who has been inside a middle school boys locker room knows that they do some very....homoerotic things in there, because middle school boys are weird. In the attic there were two mattresses standing upright in the shape of an upside down V. Brett and Noah took their shirts off, went in between the mattresses, and began to hump each other vigorously and after that it was sheer madness. The two of them were taking turns slamming their clothed crotch into the backside of the other while moaning in fake (?) pleasure, it was an incredibly weird thing to do but peer pressure made me join in. Plus it was just a joke...

They did other things as well, like going under a blanket together. I remember vividly watching the blanket shift up and down, emitting strange noises, and jumping on it and trying to join in but it just wasn't the same. Noah and Brett also stripped down to their underwear, which I refused to do, and they even tried to scissor each other. One time Noah's parents came up to see what was going on and they barely managed to break away and pull on their clothes before being interrogated.

We did things like that all night, and again the next time I spent the night, and the next time. My friends named them the "let's pretend to be gay" slumber parties.

This was in like 8th grade and I lost contact with both of them pretty soon after that. Flash forward 3 years, the summer after my Sophomore year of High School. I was dating this girl, lets call her Allie, but eventually things fell apart and I didn't hear anything from her for many years, but now word has reached me that she has married...Noah.

Two of my ex lovers just got married. And the most hilarious thing: I remember telling her this story, but I didn't say any names because I assumed she wouldn't have know them. I wonder if she has any idea...

Oh, and Brett is actually gay.

This story, with the two guys humping the sh*t out of each other...I can only think of one thing when I see that: https://www.youtube.com...
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DarthKirones
Posts: 509
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2/24/2016 3:22:50 AM
Posted: 9 months ago
At 2/19/2016 11:01:56 PM, thett3 wrote:
I told this story to Bossy over Facebook yesterday and he thought it was hilarious. Since I feel like I've probably alienated a lot of people with my incessant bullying of members regarding Trump, so here is my attempt to shore up my softer side. Plus I'm procrastinating on homework.

A few of you may know elements of this story from talking to me but here is the sheer, unadulterated version.

Okay. So growing up I had a really close friend who we will call Brett. Brett lived next door to this other guy, let's call him Noah. One day in 7th or 8th grade I went over the Bretts house to spend the night, but when I arrive there he immediately takes us to Noah's house, where we went into Noah's attic. His attic is the coolest attic I've ever seen, about the size of a three room flat, it was crazy.

Anybody who has been inside a middle school boys locker room knows that they do some very....homoerotic things in there, because middle school boys are weird. In the attic there were two mattresses standing upright in the shape of an upside down V. Brett and Noah took their shirts off, went in between the mattresses, and began to hump each other vigorously and after that it was sheer madness. The two of them were taking turns slamming their clothed crotch into the backside of the other while moaning in fake (?) pleasure, it was an incredibly weird thing to do but peer pressure made me join in. Plus it was just a joke...

They did other things as well, like going under a blanket together. I remember vividly watching the blanket shift up and down, emitting strange noises, and jumping on it and trying to join in but it just wasn't the same. Noah and Brett also stripped down to their underwear, which I refused to do, and they even tried to scissor each other. One time Noah's parents came up to see what was going on and they barely managed to break away and pull on their clothes before being interrogated.

We did things like that all night, and again the next time I spent the night, and the next time. My friends named them the "let's pretend to be gay" slumber parties.

This was in like 8th grade and I lost contact with both of them pretty soon after that. Flash forward 3 years, the summer after my Sophomore year of High School. I was dating this girl, lets call her Allie, but eventually things fell apart and I didn't hear anything from her for many years, but now word has reached me that she has married...Noah.

Two of my ex lovers just got married. And the most hilarious thing: I remember telling her this story, but I didn't say any names because I assumed she wouldn't have know them. I wonder if she has any idea...

Oh, and Brett is actually gay.

This seems like this story belongs on 4chan.
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thett3
Posts: 14,348
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2/24/2016 8:18:30 PM
Posted: 9 months ago
At 2/24/2016 4:37:36 AM, Raisor wrote:
Great. A+. Nice.

Thank you sir. I'm trying to soften my image a bit
DDO Vice President

#StandwithBossy

#UnbanTheMadman

#BetOnThett

"Don't quote me, ever." -Max

"My name is max. I'm not a big fan of slacks"- Max rapping

"Walmart should have the opportunity to bribe a politician to it's agenda" -Max

"Thett, you're really good at convincing people you're a decent person"-tulle

"You fit the character of Regina George quite nicely"- Sam

: At 11/12/2016 11:49:40 PM, Raisor wrote:
: thett was right
thett3
Posts: 14,348
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2/24/2016 8:19:32 PM
Posted: 9 months ago
At 2/24/2016 7:57:35 AM, TREssspa wrote:
thett3, Is it just a work of fiction or are you actually a whore?

Neither :(

But it definitely happened, not a work of fiction. If I was going to make a work of fiction it would be a lot funnier and portray me in a much more positive light
DDO Vice President

#StandwithBossy

#UnbanTheMadman

#BetOnThett

"Don't quote me, ever." -Max

"My name is max. I'm not a big fan of slacks"- Max rapping

"Walmart should have the opportunity to bribe a politician to it's agenda" -Max

"Thett, you're really good at convincing people you're a decent person"-tulle

"You fit the character of Regina George quite nicely"- Sam

: At 11/12/2016 11:49:40 PM, Raisor wrote:
: thett was right
Raisor
Posts: 4,460
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2/25/2016 1:37:26 AM
Posted: 9 months ago
At 2/24/2016 8:18:30 PM, thett3 wrote:
At 2/24/2016 4:37:36 AM, Raisor wrote:
Great. A+. Nice.

Thank you sir. I'm trying to soften my image a bit

Will you ever join a hangout again or are you officially retired from gchat?
thett3
Posts: 14,348
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2/25/2016 2:02:52 AM
Posted: 9 months ago
At 2/25/2016 1:37:26 AM, Raisor wrote:
At 2/24/2016 8:18:30 PM, thett3 wrote:
At 2/24/2016 4:37:36 AM, Raisor wrote:
Great. A+. Nice.

Thank you sir. I'm trying to soften my image a bit

Will you ever join a hangout again or are you officially retired from gchat?

I would absolutely join a hangout again and I probably will again soon. They just always seem to populate at times that aren't convenient for me, plus I've been going to sleep much earlier (like 11:30 instead of 2 or 3)
DDO Vice President

#StandwithBossy

#UnbanTheMadman

#BetOnThett

"Don't quote me, ever." -Max

"My name is max. I'm not a big fan of slacks"- Max rapping

"Walmart should have the opportunity to bribe a politician to it's agenda" -Max

"Thett, you're really good at convincing people you're a decent person"-tulle

"You fit the character of Regina George quite nicely"- Sam

: At 11/12/2016 11:49:40 PM, Raisor wrote:
: thett was right
TheFlex
Posts: 1,745
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2/25/2016 7:27:55 PM
Posted: 9 months ago
At 2/19/2016 11:01:56 PM, thett3 wrote:

Okay. So growing up I had a really close friend who we will call Brett.

Wish you would've used a different name. :(