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15yr old mentally ill friend help!!!

Carisa101
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2/23/2016 7:23:23 PM
Posted: 9 months ago
I have a really close friend who I care about deeply yet she uses her 'anxiety disorder' to get to me...? And she says that that her 'mental illness' is affecting the way she thinks!? I'm so confused I really need help. I don't want to hurt her but the issue is that every lunch time she tends to follow me up to the point where I begin to sit with other people. She will refuse to sit with me if I am next to my other friends!

If I'm not there with her she'd freak out and not have her lunch! She cannot sit by herself! That is why I'm trying to bridge her and have been desperately trying to get her to sit with the group because I cannot always be by her side individually..

I have a life, and I like to talk to people. And it is quite obvious that people like me and don't find me wierd.. but theyre not that great at talking to me when SHE's around :( They call her a freak which hurts me because I've known her many years.

I find it so tough I feel torn... I want to get to know other people but she is blocking me and lowering my chances. I cannot think of the best words to say to her against this mental health she has because apparently she can't control how she 'thinks'...? I understand I need to take my own path and I want to say 'she is NOT entirely my problem'......but I still don't want to leave someone feeling so alone, suffering from such a situation

What do I say if she tries to defend herself with the mental health and uses this weakness of hers to persuade me to feel her pain..
Carisa
Vaarka
Posts: 7,639
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2/23/2016 7:39:51 PM
Posted: 9 months ago
At 2/23/2016 7:23:23 PM, Carisa101 wrote:
I have a really close friend who I care about deeply yet she uses her 'anxiety disorder' to get to me...? And she says that that her 'mental illness' is affecting the way she thinks!? I'm so confused I really need help. I don't want to hurt her but the issue is that every lunch time she tends to follow me up to the point where I begin to sit with other people. She will refuse to sit with me if I am next to my other friends!

If I'm not there with her she'd freak out and not have her lunch! She cannot sit by herself! That is why I'm trying to bridge her and have been desperately trying to get her to sit with the group because I cannot always be by her side individually..

I have a life, and I like to talk to people. And it is quite obvious that people like me and don't find me wierd.. but theyre not that great at talking to me when SHE's around :( They call her a freak which hurts me because I've known her many years.

I find it so tough I feel torn... I want to get to know other people but she is blocking me and lowering my chances. I cannot think of the best words to say to her against this mental health she has because apparently she can't control how she 'thinks'...? I understand I need to take my own path and I want to say 'she is NOT entirely my problem'......but I still don't want to leave someone feeling so alone, suffering from such a situation

What do I say if she tries to defend herself with the mental health and uses this weakness of hers to persuade me to feel her pain..

I can't stand it when people try to persuade me to do stuff through guilt trips and "because they can't help it" or whatever. Sure, her problem may be very serious, but I wouldn't put up with it after a while if it continued.

As for advice...I'll have to get back to you on that, but if you need some help or want to talk privately, feel free to PM me :3
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Blade-of-Truth
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2/23/2016 8:26:10 PM
Posted: 9 months ago
At 2/23/2016 7:23:23 PM, Carisa101 wrote:
I have a really close friend who I care about deeply yet she uses her 'anxiety disorder' to get to me...? And she says that that her 'mental illness' is affecting the way she thinks!? I'm so confused I really need help. I don't want to hurt her but the issue is that every lunch time she tends to follow me up to the point where I begin to sit with other people. She will refuse to sit with me if I am next to my other friends!

If I'm not there with her she'd freak out and not have her lunch! She cannot sit by herself! That is why I'm trying to bridge her and have been desperately trying to get her to sit with the group because I cannot always be by her side individually..

I have a life, and I like to talk to people. And it is quite obvious that people like me and don't find me wierd.. but theyre not that great at talking to me when SHE's around :( They call her a freak which hurts me because I've known her many years.

I find it so tough I feel torn... I want to get to know other people but she is blocking me and lowering my chances. I cannot think of the best words to say to her against this mental health she has because apparently she can't control how she 'thinks'...? I understand I need to take my own path and I want to say 'she is NOT entirely my problem'......but I still don't want to leave someone feeling so alone, suffering from such a situation

What do I say if she tries to defend herself with the mental health and uses this weakness of hers to persuade me to feel her pain..

Does the school you go to have a guidance counseler? If so, I would bring this up to your parents and discuss it with the guidance counseler. It sounds like she needs professional help, and as a real friend - it's up to you to get her the help she really needs.

You've done your best up to this point, so don't beat yourself up. Unfortunately, her issue is one that is bigger than you can handle alone, you'll need some help. So talk to your parents privately about this, and then speak with your guidance counselor. They'll be able to get her the help she needs and you'll be doing something that will really help your friend.

It's going to be hard, but you can do it. Just remember that it's all to help her, and eventually it'll be for the best once she gets the help she really needs from professionals trained to deal with issues like hers.
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PetersSmith
Posts: 5,859
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2/23/2016 9:28:04 PM
Posted: 9 months ago
At 2/23/2016 7:23:23 PM, Carisa101 wrote:
I have a really close friend who I care about deeply yet she uses her 'anxiety disorder' to get to me...? And she says that that her 'mental illness' is affecting the way she thinks!? I'm so confused I really need help. I don't want to hurt her but the issue is that every lunch time she tends to follow me up to the point where I begin to sit with other people. She will refuse to sit with me if I am next to my other friends!

If I'm not there with her she'd freak out and not have her lunch! She cannot sit by herself! That is why I'm trying to bridge her and have been desperately trying to get her to sit with the group because I cannot always be by her side individually..

I have a life, and I like to talk to people. And it is quite obvious that people like me and don't find me wierd.. but theyre not that great at talking to me when SHE's around :( They call her a freak which hurts me because I've known her many years.

I find it so tough I feel torn... I want to get to know other people but she is blocking me and lowering my chances. I cannot think of the best words to say to her against this mental health she has because apparently she can't control how she 'thinks'...? I understand I need to take my own path and I want to say 'she is NOT entirely my problem'......but I still don't want to leave someone feeling so alone, suffering from such a situation

What do I say if she tries to defend herself with the mental health and uses this weakness of hers to persuade me to feel her pain..

This sounds like more dependent personality disorder than generalized anxiety disorder. If that is the case, you need to take the initiative and get her to see a school counselor or psychologist because she isn't going to go herself.
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Carisa101
Posts: 3
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2/24/2016 8:19:47 PM
Posted: 9 months ago
I really appreciate the help thank you people. I don't think she wants to see a psychologist :(
Carisa
beng100
Posts: 1,055
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2/25/2016 12:07:05 AM
Posted: 9 months ago
At 2/23/2016 7:23:23 PM, Carisa101 wrote:
I have a really close friend who I care about deeply yet she uses her 'anxiety disorder' to get to me...? And she says that that her 'mental illness' is affecting the way she thinks!? I'm so confused I really need help. I don't want to hurt her but the issue is that every lunch time she tends to follow me up to the point where I begin to sit with other people. She will refuse to sit with me if I am next to my other friends!

If I'm not there with her she'd freak out and not have her lunch! She cannot sit by herself! That is why I'm trying to bridge her and have been desperately trying to get her to sit with the group because I cannot always be by her side individually..

I have a life, and I like to talk to people. And it is quite obvious that people like me and don't find me wierd.. but theyre not that great at talking to me when SHE's around :( They call her a freak which hurts me because I've known her many years.

I find it so tough I feel torn... I want to get to know other people but she is blocking me and lowering my chances. I cannot think of the best words to say to her against this mental health she has because apparently she can't control how she 'thinks'...? I understand I need to take my own path and I want to say 'she is NOT entirely my problem'......but I still don't want to leave someone feeling so alone, suffering from such a situation

What do I say if she tries to defend herself with the mental health and uses this weakness of hers to persuade me to feel her pain..

If i was you i would try and talk to your friend about what exactly causes her anxiety and what she can do to help avoid it. explain that at times her problems are making things hard for you as well. Maybe try to talk about ways how you can handle lunchtime. Maybe you could sit with her for a bit and then go and talk to the group after? It's also important I think that she gets in contact with a medical professional to try and help her with her problems. I know persuading her to do this might be hard and it depends on the circumstances but I would try my best to encourage her to do so. If she gets the right help it could transform her life. If your very worried about her maybe discuss it with your teachers or parents.