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Good and Bad People

YYW
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3/28/2016 4:15:58 PM
Posted: 8 months ago
With each passing day it continues to amaze me how bad some people are at judging other's character; even I, too, am still learning.

So many of us hide who we really are, put on a face, and hold that out to the world. Some people are exceptionally good at that, as well. Those who would conceal darkness, manipulation, and deviance behind a veneer of politeness and animal memes, as surely as those who would conceal totalizing dominance of another behind the visage of conspicuous, external kindness.

Most people do not stop to ask what's really going on. They do not think about what they're missing, because they trust that they're seeing everything. Deception doesn't take obvious forms. Manipulation does not feel coercive. Dominance, if it will ever last, does not feel oppressive. Deception feels like honesty. Manipulation looks and feels like kindness and graciousness. Dominance feels like warmth.

Understanding the difference between good and bad people requires a knowledge of good and evil in ways that I don't think many people have anymore, and a level of skepticism that I think most will never develop. Most do not understand others motives for doing what they're doing, and, in so many respects, those who set themselves out to the task, fail.

It is so easy to find yourself ensnared by another's personality. Perhaps you think they are kind to others, when they are simply grooming them. Perhaps you think they care about you, when they are grooming you. Perhaps you think they would make good moderators, when in reality their entire purpose on this site has been to acquire the means to control others for its own sake.

To be a good judge of character requires more than seeing people as they present themselves; it requires seeing through them, their masks, and what they show you, to the core of who they are. Absent a solid foundation in classical literature, or a reasonable degree of life experience with people unlike yourself, I don't think that's possible for people to have... unless you're one of those few who just have "good horse sense."

There are too many people on this site who fall into one of two categories: the ones who know so little of evil that they cannot distinguish it from good, and the ones who have only known evil their entire lives, so they misinterpret observable sentiment for compassion and human empathy.

But people always reveal who they are in the end; the only thing that being able to make the distinction between good and bad people affords is the ability to insulate yourself from unnecessary heartache. Certainly we all have secrets, and that's alright. What is not alright is when your secrets conceal innate, self-serving maliciousness. Unfortunately, that revelation comes far too late.
Tsar of DDO
Rosalie
Posts: 4,612
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3/28/2016 4:17:32 PM
Posted: 8 months ago
https://vine.co...
" We need more videos of cat's playing the piano on the internet" - My art professor.

"Criticism is easier to take when you realize that the only people who aren't criticized are those who don't take risks." - Donald Trump

Officially Mrs. 16Kadams 8-30-16
bsh1
Posts: 27,504
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3/28/2016 4:39:37 PM
Posted: 8 months ago
Oh, the passive-aggressive vibes.
Live Long and Prosper

I'm a Bish.


"Twilight isn't just about obtuse metaphors between cannibalism and premarital sex, it also teaches us the futility of hope." - Raisor

"[Bsh1] is the Guinan of DDO." - ButterCatX

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cybertron1998
Posts: 5,818
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3/28/2016 4:47:55 PM
Posted: 8 months ago
Bloody fricken hell I've had enough. YYW, Bsh neither of you have shown exemplary conduct with your interactions. Either you two need to sort it out or leave each other alone.

Bsh1, its obvious that while you are allowed to talk in YYW's threads, you still subconsciously target him and attack him. While its not as brutal the emotions of distaste are still there.

And YYW, In the, now seemingly rare case where bsh1 does respond without any underlying aggressions (and it does happen), you still proceed to shoot him down in some of the worst ways possible.

Plenty of us are sick and tired of you two fighting. Derail or not, I'm calling you both out, because you both need to cool off at each other.
Epsilon: There are so many stories where some brave hero decides to give their life to save the day, and because of their sacrifice, the good guys win, the survivors all cheer, and everybody lives happily ever after. But the hero... never gets to see that ending. They'll never know if their sacrifice actually made a difference. They'll never know if the day was really saved. In the end, they just have to have faith.
Rosalie
Posts: 4,612
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3/28/2016 5:03:08 PM
Posted: 8 months ago
Does anyone like vanilla cupcakes?

I can't stand chocolate...
" We need more videos of cat's playing the piano on the internet" - My art professor.

"Criticism is easier to take when you realize that the only people who aren't criticized are those who don't take risks." - Donald Trump

Officially Mrs. 16Kadams 8-30-16
YYW
Posts: 36,289
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3/28/2016 5:08:35 PM
Posted: 8 months ago
At 3/28/2016 5:01:46 PM, Cermank wrote:
what even is this

reminds me of a fanfic i wrote when i was young. YA. Dramione.

Care to share?

10/10 wud do again
Tsar of DDO
Rosalie
Posts: 4,612
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3/28/2016 5:12:53 PM
Posted: 8 months ago
At 3/28/2016 5:05:24 PM, Cermank wrote:
At 3/28/2016 5:03:08 PM, Rosalie wrote:
Does anyone like vanilla cupcakes?

I can't stand chocolate...

im judging u

*sigh* I hear that everyday...

Chocolate makes me thirsty doe
" We need more videos of cat's playing the piano on the internet" - My art professor.

"Criticism is easier to take when you realize that the only people who aren't criticized are those who don't take risks." - Donald Trump

Officially Mrs. 16Kadams 8-30-16
YYW
Posts: 36,289
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3/28/2016 5:13:20 PM
Posted: 8 months ago
There is a legitimate discussion to be had about how people judge the character of others, whether that discussion makes some people uncomfortable or not. What is astonishing to me is the fact that whenever anyone brings up anything real, something substantive, or that matters... there are so many people who immediately run from that or misinterpret what that discussion means and then react to it inappropriately.

There is perhaps no more important discussion to be had than how we evaluate others' character, though it obviously bucks up against the "let's all love everybody!" PC bullsh!t that to many remain imbibed with. But this... this is real. This is reality. If it makes people uncomfortable, then don't participate in the discussion.
Tsar of DDO
Slimey_Jack
Posts: 46
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3/28/2016 5:16:34 PM
Posted: 8 months ago
Using each other is pointless in an atheist's world. It is almost like graphing space,myou need a reference point. There is no true "reference point" for morality. 'assuming god doesn't exist;
YYW
Posts: 36,289
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3/28/2016 5:17:34 PM
Posted: 8 months ago
It has also come to my attention that people believe this thread targets a specific person.

This is strange, because it so obviously applies to everyone; all of us, in our daily lives, face the challenges I described in this thread. Some more than others, but this is not unique to any particular individual.

People's visceral reactions' need to be reigned in. If you don't want to talk about this issue, then don't post in my thread.
Tsar of DDO
YYW
Posts: 36,289
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3/28/2016 5:17:58 PM
Posted: 8 months ago
At 3/28/2016 5:16:34 PM, Slimey_Jack wrote:
Using each other is pointless in an atheist's world. It is almost like graphing space,myou need a reference point. There is no true "reference point" for morality. 'assuming god doesn't exist;

I disagree. There are moral absolutes in this world.
Tsar of DDO
Slimey_Jack
Posts: 46
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3/28/2016 5:20:29 PM
Posted: 8 months ago
At 3/28/2016 5:12:53 PM, Rosalie wrote:
At 3/28/2016 5:05:24 PM, Cermank wrote:
At 3/28/2016 5:03:08 PM, Rosalie wrote:
Does anyone like vanilla cupcakes?

I can't stand chocolate...

im judging u

*sigh* I hear that everyday...

Chocolate makes me thirsty doe

I like me some good chocolate. Once i made some with some cocoa beans i bought. It was a disaster. It was sooo bitter and crumbly. Like a bread cracker. But i have learned to like it. Now i can't get enough.
Slimey_Jack
Posts: 46
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3/28/2016 5:21:15 PM
Posted: 8 months ago
At 3/28/2016 5:17:58 PM, YYW wrote:
At 3/28/2016 5:16:34 PM, Slimey_Jack wrote:
Using each other is pointless in an atheist's world. It is almost like graphing space,myou need a reference point. There is no true "reference point" for morality. 'assuming god doesn't exist;

I disagree. There are moral absolutes in this world.

Like what?
YYW
Posts: 36,289
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3/28/2016 5:22:02 PM
Posted: 8 months ago
At 3/28/2016 5:21:15 PM, Slimey_Jack wrote:
At 3/28/2016 5:17:58 PM, YYW wrote:
At 3/28/2016 5:16:34 PM, Slimey_Jack wrote:
Using each other is pointless in an atheist's world. It is almost like graphing space,myou need a reference point. There is no true "reference point" for morality. 'assuming god doesn't exist;

I disagree. There are moral absolutes in this world.

Like what?

Exploiting other people for one's personal satisfaction is wrong.
Tsar of DDO
ESocialBookworm
Posts: 14,364
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3/28/2016 5:22:58 PM
Posted: 8 months ago
At 3/28/2016 4:15:58 PM, YYW wrote:
But people always reveal who they are in the end; the only thing that being able to make the distinction between good and bad people affords is the ability to insulate yourself from unnecessary heartache.
Did you mean isolate?
Solonkr~
I don't care about whether an ideology is "necessary" or not,
I care about how to solve problems,
which is what everyone else should also care about.

Ken~
In essence, the world is fucked up and you can either ignore it, become cynical or bitter about it.

Me~
"BAILEY + SOLON = SAILEY
MY SHIP SAILEY MUST SAIL"

SCREW THAT SHIZ #BANNIE = BAILEY & ANNIE

P.S. Shipped Sailey before it was cannon bitches.
Slimey_Jack
Posts: 46
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3/28/2016 5:23:21 PM
Posted: 8 months ago
At 3/28/2016 5:22:02 PM, YYW wrote:
At 3/28/2016 5:21:15 PM, Slimey_Jack wrote:
At 3/28/2016 5:17:58 PM, YYW wrote:
At 3/28/2016 5:16:34 PM, Slimey_Jack wrote:
Using each other is pointless in an atheist's world. It is almost like graphing space,myou need a reference point. There is no true "reference point" for morality. 'assuming god doesn't exist;

I disagree. There are moral absolutes in this world.

Like what?

Exploiting other people for one's personal satisfaction is wrong.

According to your opinion, i actually meant an "absolute" "opinion".
YYW
Posts: 36,289
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3/28/2016 5:23:37 PM
Posted: 8 months ago
At 3/28/2016 5:22:58 PM, ESocialBookworm wrote:
At 3/28/2016 4:15:58 PM, YYW wrote:
But people always reveal who they are in the end; the only thing that being able to make the distinction between good and bad people affords is the ability to insulate yourself from unnecessary heartache.
Did you mean isolate?

Either works.
Tsar of DDO
Slimey_Jack
Posts: 46
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3/28/2016 5:28:14 PM
Posted: 8 months ago
At 3/28/2016 5:24:31 PM, Slimey_Jack wrote:
Pure evil or good. Perfection of either side i have not encountered.

I have talked with T-H-M and a my chinese buddy named Puckomon and they have convinced me god exists. I am just trying to stay un-biased.
ESocialBookworm
Posts: 14,364
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3/28/2016 5:37:09 PM
Posted: 8 months ago
Cyber, Brian wasn't mentioned in or by the OP at all though. In fact, the OP has a pretty good point- a lot of people, myself and even you included, don't always see people for who they truly are, until sometimes it's too late.

Anyhow, back to the actual point: When I first joined DDO, I was skeptical about making friends on any site. I believed many used the wall of the internet as a mask, and may not truly be who they say they are.

As I befriended and got closer to people, my walls slowly but surely crumbled, and I was willing to be myself and share personal things with a lot of people. DDO is, of course, a special, close-knitted community. However, as I now realize, I should have stuck with my first plan.

After all, the illusion of the internet as a sleeve often allows many to 'catfish' or play with one another's mind, without consequence. We see this in flame-wars, gossip, sending inappropriate pictures or pornography (Guilty for the former- what can I say? I like to freak people out with gore...), or even people just doing things that they really shouldn't.

I've come to the point on DDO and irl, where I'm no longer willing to put up with a lot of sh!t. If people want to walk away, I'll hold the door for them. Even if they're a good person, I've gotten so lazy that I won't fight for people to stay. People come and go. That's life. If I think you're a bad person, I'll- somewhat- tolerate you, but we won't be close.

I'd like to think I'm a good judge of character, but that'd be lying. I'm not the smartest or most perceptive person in the world. I've made and lost friends in life, and well, frankly, while I'm good, somewhat, at knowing what is right and wrong, I too make mistakes, fall for pretenses of facetious care and even- oh shocker! (/sarcasm)- feign admiration or liking others.

Truly though, I don't believe people can be fundamentally 'good' or 'bad.' I believe we're all human beings who endure and commit varying degrees of f*cked up sh!t.
Solonkr~
I don't care about whether an ideology is "necessary" or not,
I care about how to solve problems,
which is what everyone else should also care about.

Ken~
In essence, the world is fucked up and you can either ignore it, become cynical or bitter about it.

Me~
"BAILEY + SOLON = SAILEY
MY SHIP SAILEY MUST SAIL"

SCREW THAT SHIZ #BANNIE = BAILEY & ANNIE

P.S. Shipped Sailey before it was cannon bitches.
ESocialBookworm
Posts: 14,364
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3/28/2016 5:39:06 PM
Posted: 8 months ago
At 3/28/2016 5:24:31 PM, Slimey_Jack wrote:
Pure evil or good. Perfection of either side i have not encountered.

Mhmm... I don't think people can be inherently bad or good. It's impossible to categorize people in those terms because of how vague they are. No one hasn't sinned, so does that mean we're all bad people? Perhaps we are...
Solonkr~
I don't care about whether an ideology is "necessary" or not,
I care about how to solve problems,
which is what everyone else should also care about.

Ken~
In essence, the world is fucked up and you can either ignore it, become cynical or bitter about it.

Me~
"BAILEY + SOLON = SAILEY
MY SHIP SAILEY MUST SAIL"

SCREW THAT SHIZ #BANNIE = BAILEY & ANNIE

P.S. Shipped Sailey before it was cannon bitches.
YYW
Posts: 36,289
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3/28/2016 5:40:02 PM
Posted: 8 months ago
At 3/28/2016 5:37:09 PM, ESocialBookworm wrote:
Cyber, Brian wasn't mentioned in or by the OP at all though. In fact, the OP has a pretty good point- a lot of people, myself and even you included, don't always see people for who they truly are, until sometimes it's too late.

Anyhow, back to the actual point: When I first joined DDO, I was skeptical about making friends on any site. I believed many used the wall of the internet as a mask, and may not truly be who they say they are.

As I befriended and got closer to people, my walls slowly but surely crumbled, and I was willing to be myself and share personal things with a lot of people. DDO is, of course, a special, close-knitted community. However, as I now realize, I should have stuck with my first plan.

After all, the illusion of the internet as a sleeve often allows many to 'catfish' or play with one another's mind, without consequence. We see this in flame-wars, gossip, sending inappropriate pictures or pornography (Guilty for the former- what can I say? I like to freak people out with gore...), or even people just doing things that they really shouldn't.

I've come to the point on DDO and irl, where I'm no longer willing to put up with a lot of sh!t. If people want to walk away, I'll hold the door for them. Even if they're a good person, I've gotten so lazy that I won't fight for people to stay. People come and go. That's life. If I think you're a bad person, I'll- somewhat- tolerate you, but we won't be close.

I'd like to think I'm a good judge of character, but that'd be lying. I'm not the smartest or most perceptive person in the world. I've made and lost friends in life, and well, frankly, while I'm good, somewhat, at knowing what is right and wrong, I too make mistakes, fall for pretenses of facetious care and even- oh shocker! (/sarcasm)- feign admiration or liking others.


Truly though, I don't believe people can be fundamentally 'good' or 'bad.' I believe we're all human beings who endure and commit varying degrees of f*cked up sh!t.

Well put.
Tsar of DDO
Slimey_Jack
Posts: 46
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3/28/2016 5:41:13 PM
Posted: 8 months ago
At 3/28/2016 5:39:06 PM, ESocialBookworm wrote:
At 3/28/2016 5:24:31 PM, Slimey_Jack wrote:
Pure evil or good. Perfection of either side i have not encountered.

Mhmm... I don't think people can be inherently bad or good. It's impossible to categorize people in those terms because of how vague they are. No one hasn't sinned, so does that mean we're all bad people? Perhaps we are...

From a christian perspective there are two sides.

Saved. Not saved.
Christian. Not christian.

And everyone deserves eternal damnation so yeah, we are all in the bad.
ESocialBookworm
Posts: 14,364
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3/28/2016 5:42:11 PM
Posted: 8 months ago
At 3/28/2016 5:41:13 PM, Slimey_Jack wrote:
At 3/28/2016 5:39:06 PM, ESocialBookworm wrote:
At 3/28/2016 5:24:31 PM, Slimey_Jack wrote:
Pure evil or good. Perfection of either side i have not encountered.

Mhmm... I don't think people can be inherently bad or good. It's impossible to categorize people in those terms because of how vague they are. No one hasn't sinned, so does that mean we're all bad people? Perhaps we are...

From a christian perspective there are two sides.

Saved. Not saved.
Christian. Not christian.

And everyone deserves eternal damnation so yeah, we are all in the bad.

So we're all going to Hell?
Solonkr~
I don't care about whether an ideology is "necessary" or not,
I care about how to solve problems,
which is what everyone else should also care about.

Ken~
In essence, the world is fucked up and you can either ignore it, become cynical or bitter about it.

Me~
"BAILEY + SOLON = SAILEY
MY SHIP SAILEY MUST SAIL"

SCREW THAT SHIZ #BANNIE = BAILEY & ANNIE

P.S. Shipped Sailey before it was cannon bitches.
Slimey_Jack
Posts: 46
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3/28/2016 5:45:42 PM
Posted: 8 months ago
At 3/28/2016 5:42:11 PM, ESocialBookworm wrote:
At 3/28/2016 5:41:13 PM, Slimey_Jack wrote:
At 3/28/2016 5:39:06 PM, ESocialBookworm wrote:
At 3/28/2016 5:24:31 PM, Slimey_Jack wrote:
Pure evil or good. Perfection of either side i have not encountered.

Mhmm... I don't think people can be inherently bad or good. It's impossible to categorize people in those terms because of how vague they are. No one hasn't sinned, so does that mean we're all bad people? Perhaps we are...

From a christian perspective there are two sides.

Saved. Not saved.
Christian. Not christian.

And everyone deserves eternal damnation so yeah, we are all in the bad.

So we're all going to Hell?

I am not shure about islamics but i believe the Jewish will be saved along with Christianity 'from my perspective; because i don't think god would abandon those who believe in the old testament.
YYW
Posts: 36,289
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3/28/2016 5:47:59 PM
Posted: 8 months ago
At 3/28/2016 4:47:55 PM, cybertron1998 wrote:
Bloody fricken hell I've had enough. YYW, Bsh neither of you have shown exemplary conduct with your interactions. Either you two need to sort it out or leave each other alone.

Bsh1, its obvious that while you are allowed to talk in YYW's threads, you still subconsciously target him and attack him. While its not as brutal the emotions of distaste are still there.

And YYW, In the, now seemingly rare case where bsh1 does respond without any underlying aggressions (and it does happen), you still proceed to shoot him down in some of the worst ways possible.

Plenty of us are sick and tired of you two fighting. Derail or not, I'm calling you both out, because you both need to cool off at each other.

It's amazing to me how people who are ignorant of facts and circumstances think they understand what's happening when they do not.

This is one such circumstance, and we've had this conversation before where you read something and then irrationally concluded I was saying something that I was not. Perhaps it takes more maturity for people to be able to take a step back from the immanent drama that they're all caught up in, but this is me, moving to a point where I can more easily walk away from this place.

Obviously there's a lot going on here, and the fact that I didn't name names (though I certainly could) is something that shouldn't be lost upon you. More obvious, I can't control how you or a few others reach the unreasonable conclusion that this was some form of passive aggressive hit. It's not. It's me talking about something that's on my mind, and if you don't like that then don't participate in the discussion.

The practical effect of what your post would be, assuming I took the bait, would be to *make* this post about drama that exists between bsh1 and I. But the fact is that he's one of about nine people I was thinking about when I wrote this post; nine active users on this site, not just one person, as your comment suggests.

As Annie correctly indicated, you need to take a step back. If you can't read other's posts without misinterpreting their meaning, then we've got problems. If I hadn't had this conversation with you three times before, I might be more tolerant of your emotional reaction here... but in that you're doing the same thing over and over, I've grown tired of it.

There are certain things in this life that matter, and how we judge others' character is one of the most important out there. Frankly, I can't think of a more important topic. If you have experiences in that regard that you'd like to share, or a perspective that relates to the OP which is on topic and not related to specific users or instances of drama, then feel free. Otherwise, get out of my thread.
Tsar of DDO
YYW
Posts: 36,289
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3/28/2016 5:50:31 PM
Posted: 8 months ago
At 3/28/2016 5:24:31 PM, Slimey_Jack wrote:
Pure evil or good. Perfection of either side i have not encountered.

Yes, we all exist in varying degrees.
Tsar of DDO