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I need advice.

ILoveSitarMusic
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6/19/2016 6:14:58 PM
Posted: 5 months ago
I had a conflict with a friend two years ago, and I desire to make peace. We are both Christian, and the Bible says to make peace when conflicts arise. How do I do this?
PetersSmith
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6/19/2016 6:16:17 PM
Posted: 5 months ago
At 6/19/2016 6:14:58 PM, ILoveSitarMusic wrote:
I had a conflict with a friend two years ago, and I desire to make peace. We are both Christian, and the Bible says to make peace when conflicts arise. How do I do this?

You're going to have to be more specific.
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bballcrook21
Posts: 4,468
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6/19/2016 6:55:30 PM
Posted: 5 months ago
At 6/19/2016 6:14:58 PM, ILoveSitarMusic wrote:
I had a conflict with a friend two years ago, and I desire to make peace. We are both Christian, and the Bible says to make peace when conflicts arise. How do I do this?

You do it by not posting stupid crap in the forums.
If you put the federal government in charge of the Sahara Desert, in 5 years there'd be a shortage of sand. - Friedman

Underlying most arguments against the free market is a lack of belief in freedom itself. -Friedman

Nothing is so permanent as a temporary government program. - Friedman

Society will never be free until the last Democrat is strangled with the entrails of the last Communist.
Emmarie
Posts: 1,907
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6/19/2016 7:13:33 PM
Posted: 5 months ago
At 6/19/2016 6:14:58 PM, ILoveSitarMusic wrote:
I had a conflict with a friend two years ago, and I desire to make peace. We are both Christian, and the Bible says to make peace when conflicts arise. How do I do this?
It depends on how serious the conflict was. I'd send a handwritten letter, since so much time has passed, highlighting the bond you once had with your friend and your desire to reunite the friendship. Then do a follow up call in like a week if he or she doesn't contact you. Try to focus on the positive aspects of the friendship you once shared, and mention that time has made you realize whatever your fault in the conflict was. If he or she tries to rehash the conflict, than maybe he or she isn't as Christian as they claim to be.
ILoveSitarMusic
Posts: 225
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6/19/2016 7:18:09 PM
Posted: 5 months ago
At 6/19/2016 6:55:30 PM, bballcrook21 wrote:
At 6/19/2016 6:14:58 PM, ILoveSitarMusic wrote:
I had a conflict with a friend two years ago, and I desire to make peace. We are both Christian, and the Bible says to make peace when conflicts arise. How do I do this?

You do it by not posting stupid crap in the forums.
Reported for trolling.
ILoveSitarMusic
Posts: 225
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6/19/2016 7:20:59 PM
Posted: 5 months ago
At 6/19/2016 7:13:33 PM, Emmarie wrote:
At 6/19/2016 6:14:58 PM, ILoveSitarMusic wrote:
I had a conflict with a friend two years ago, and I desire to make peace. We are both Christian, and the Bible says to make peace when conflicts arise. How do I do this?
It depends on how serious the conflict was. I'd send a handwritten letter, since so much time has passed, highlighting the bond you once had with your friend and your desire to reunite the friendship. Then do a follow up call in like a week if he or she doesn't contact you. Try to focus on the positive aspects of the friendship you once shared, and mention that time has made you realize whatever your fault in the conflict was. If he or she tries to rehash the conflict, than maybe he or she isn't as Christian as they claim to be.

Good idea. I will write a letter. Thank you.
Emmarie
Posts: 1,907
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6/19/2016 7:22:23 PM
Posted: 5 months ago
At 6/19/2016 7:20:59 PM, ILoveSitarMusic wrote:
At 6/19/2016 7:13:33 PM, Emmarie wrote:
At 6/19/2016 6:14:58 PM, ILoveSitarMusic wrote:
I had a conflict with a friend two years ago, and I desire to make peace. We are both Christian, and the Bible says to make peace when conflicts arise. How do I do this?
It depends on how serious the conflict was. I'd send a handwritten letter, since so much time has passed, highlighting the bond you once had with your friend and your desire to reunite the friendship. Then do a follow up call in like a week if he or she doesn't contact you. Try to focus on the positive aspects of the friendship you once shared, and mention that time has made you realize whatever your fault in the conflict was. If he or she tries to rehash the conflict, than maybe he or she isn't as Christian as they claim to be.

Good idea. I will write a letter. Thank you.
Your Welcome, I hope you can save your friendship :)
CaptainBallarms
Posts: 24
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6/19/2016 7:24:07 PM
Posted: 5 months ago
https://www.amazon.com...

Charles Foster is a great author regarding telling difficult truths and resolving situations like this. I always recommend him.
bballcrook21
Posts: 4,468
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6/19/2016 7:24:29 PM
Posted: 5 months ago
At 6/19/2016 7:18:09 PM, ILoveSitarMusic wrote:
At 6/19/2016 6:55:30 PM, bballcrook21 wrote:
At 6/19/2016 6:14:58 PM, ILoveSitarMusic wrote:
I had a conflict with a friend two years ago, and I desire to make peace. We are both Christian, and the Bible says to make peace when conflicts arise. How do I do this?

You do it by not posting stupid crap in the forums.
Reported for trolling.

I'm shaking in my boots.
If you put the federal government in charge of the Sahara Desert, in 5 years there'd be a shortage of sand. - Friedman

Underlying most arguments against the free market is a lack of belief in freedom itself. -Friedman

Nothing is so permanent as a temporary government program. - Friedman

Society will never be free until the last Democrat is strangled with the entrails of the last Communist.
ILoveSitarMusic
Posts: 225
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6/19/2016 7:26:02 PM
Posted: 5 months ago
At 6/19/2016 7:24:29 PM, bballcrook21 wrote:
At 6/19/2016 7:18:09 PM, ILoveSitarMusic wrote:
At 6/19/2016 6:55:30 PM, bballcrook21 wrote:
At 6/19/2016 6:14:58 PM, ILoveSitarMusic wrote:
I had a conflict with a friend two years ago, and I desire to make peace. We are both Christian, and the Bible says to make peace when conflicts arise. How do I do this?

You do it by not posting stupid crap in the forums.
Reported for trolling.

I'm shaking in my boots.
Youy need to leave this post. I will not tolerat a troll.
bballcrook21
Posts: 4,468
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6/19/2016 7:27:11 PM
Posted: 5 months ago
At 6/19/2016 7:26:02 PM, ILoveSitarMusic wrote:
At 6/19/2016 7:24:29 PM, bballcrook21 wrote:
At 6/19/2016 7:18:09 PM, ILoveSitarMusic wrote:
At 6/19/2016 6:55:30 PM, bballcrook21 wrote:
At 6/19/2016 6:14:58 PM, ILoveSitarMusic wrote:
I had a conflict with a friend two years ago, and I desire to make peace. We are both Christian, and the Bible says to make peace when conflicts arise. How do I do this?

You do it by not posting stupid crap in the forums.
Reported for trolling.

I'm shaking in my boots.
Youy need to leave this post. I will not tolerat a troll.

But you will tolerate 4th grade grammar skills?
If you put the federal government in charge of the Sahara Desert, in 5 years there'd be a shortage of sand. - Friedman

Underlying most arguments against the free market is a lack of belief in freedom itself. -Friedman

Nothing is so permanent as a temporary government program. - Friedman

Society will never be free until the last Democrat is strangled with the entrails of the last Communist.
SamStevens
Posts: 3,819
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6/19/2016 7:30:03 PM
Posted: 5 months ago
At 6/19/2016 7:27:11 PM, bballcrook21 wrote:
At 6/19/2016 7:26:02 PM, ILoveSitarMusic wrote:
At 6/19/2016 7:24:29 PM, bballcrook21 wrote:
At 6/19/2016 7:18:09 PM, ILoveSitarMusic wrote:
At 6/19/2016 6:55:30 PM, bballcrook21 wrote:
At 6/19/2016 6:14:58 PM, ILoveSitarMusic wrote:
I had a conflict with a friend two years ago, and I desire to make peace. We are both Christian, and the Bible says to make peace when conflicts arise. How do I do this?

You do it by not posting stupid crap in the forums.
Reported for trolling.

I'm shaking in my boots.
Youy need to leave this post. I will not tolerat a troll.

But you will tolerate 4th grade grammar skills?

http://stream1.gifsoup.com...
"This is the true horror of religion. It allows perfectly decent and sane people to believe by the billions, what only lunatics could believe on their own." Sam Harris
Life asked Death "Why do people love me but hate you?"
Death responded: "Because you are a beautiful lie, and I am the painful truth."
Adam_Godzilla
Posts: 2,487
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6/19/2016 10:44:35 PM
Posted: 5 months ago
At 6/19/2016 7:13:33 PM, Emmarie wrote:
At 6/19/2016 6:14:58 PM, ILoveSitarMusic wrote:
I had a conflict with a friend two years ago, and I desire to make peace. We are both Christian, and the Bible says to make peace when conflicts arise. How do I do this?
It depends on how serious the conflict was. I'd send a handwritten letter, since so much time has passed, highlighting the bond you once had with your friend and your desire to reunite the friendship. Then do a follow up call in like a week if he or she doesn't contact you. Try to focus on the positive aspects of the friendship you once shared, and mention that time has made you realize whatever your fault in the conflict was. If he or she tries to rehash the conflict, than maybe he or she isn't as Christian as they claim to be.

I just wanted to say, that is some really good advice.
New episode of OUTSIDERS: http://www.debate.org...
Episode 4 - They walk among us
Adam_Godzilla
Posts: 2,487
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6/19/2016 10:48:25 PM
Posted: 5 months ago
At 6/19/2016 6:14:58 PM, ILoveSitarMusic wrote:
I had a conflict with a friend two years ago, and I desire to make peace. We are both Christian, and the Bible says to make peace when conflicts arise. How do I do this?

If you haven't talked during that time he/she has probably forgiven you in some way. But if you talk to him/her be prepared for some reluctance and bad memories arising. I like that you are opting for peace, that is great. For me, I would talk to the person directly, that way, I can gauge their reaction. It's scary though.

Good luck.
New episode of OUTSIDERS: http://www.debate.org...
Episode 4 - They walk among us
ILoveSitarMusic
Posts: 225
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6/19/2016 10:52:39 PM
Posted: 5 months ago
At 6/19/2016 10:48:25 PM, Adam_Godzilla wrote:
At 6/19/2016 6:14:58 PM, ILoveSitarMusic wrote:
I had a conflict with a friend two years ago, and I desire to make peace. We are both Christian, and the Bible says to make peace when conflicts arise. How do I do this?

If you haven't talked during that time he/she has probably forgiven you in some way. But if you talk to him/her be prepared for some reluctance and bad memories arising. I like that you are opting for peace, that is great. For me, I would talk to the person directly, that way, I can gauge their reaction. It's scary though.

Good luck.
Thank you. I hope she has.
Omniscient_Debater
Posts: 285
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6/19/2016 10:57:54 PM
Posted: 5 months ago
At 6/19/2016 7:26:02 PM, ILoveSitarMusic wrote:
At 6/19/2016 7:24:29 PM, bballcrook21 wrote:
At 6/19/2016 7:18:09 PM, ILoveSitarMusic wrote:
At 6/19/2016 6:55:30 PM, bballcrook21 wrote:
At 6/19/2016 6:14:58 PM, ILoveSitarMusic wrote:
I had a conflict with a friend two years ago, and I desire to make peace. We are both Christian, and the Bible says to make peace when conflicts arise. How do I do this?

You do it by not posting stupid crap in the forums.
Reported for trolling.

I'm shaking in my boots.
Youy need to leave this post. I will not tolerat a troll.

He's not a troll, Bballcrook is a serious member from what I have read, and I assure that you he doesn't tell you this to piss you off or get a laugh.
ILoveSitarMusic
Posts: 225
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6/19/2016 11:13:28 PM
Posted: 5 months ago
At 6/19/2016 10:57:54 PM, Omniscient_Debater wrote:
At 6/19/2016 7:26:02 PM, ILoveSitarMusic wrote:
At 6/19/2016 7:24:29 PM, bballcrook21 wrote:
At 6/19/2016 7:18:09 PM, ILoveSitarMusic wrote:
At 6/19/2016 6:55:30 PM, bballcrook21 wrote:
At 6/19/2016 6:14:58 PM, ILoveSitarMusic wrote:
I had a conflict with a friend two years ago, and I desire to make peace. We are both Christian, and the Bible says to make peace when conflicts arise. How do I do this?

You do it by not posting stupid crap in the forums.
Reported for trolling.

I'm shaking in my boots.
Youy need to leave this post. I will not tolerat a troll.

He's not a troll, Bballcrook is a serious member from what I have read, and I assure that you he doesn't tell you this to piss you off or get a laugh.
Yes he is a troll. His first comment was a troll comment.
Emmarie
Posts: 1,907
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6/20/2016 1:26:05 AM
Posted: 5 months ago
At 6/19/2016 10:44:35 PM, Adam_Godzilla wrote:
At 6/19/2016 7:13:33 PM, Emmarie wrote:
At 6/19/2016 6:14:58 PM, ILoveSitarMusic wrote:
I had a conflict with a friend two years ago, and I desire to make peace. We are both Christian, and the Bible says to make peace when conflicts arise. How do I do this?
It depends on how serious the conflict was. I'd send a handwritten letter, since so much time has passed, highlighting the bond you once had with your friend and your desire to reunite the friendship. Then do a follow up call in like a week if he or she doesn't contact you. Try to focus on the positive aspects of the friendship you once shared, and mention that time has made you realize whatever your fault in the conflict was. If he or she tries to rehash the conflict, than maybe he or she isn't as Christian as they claim to be.

I just wanted to say, that is some really good advice.
Thanks :)
lannan13
Posts: 23,022
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6/20/2016 5:51:40 AM
Posted: 5 months ago
At 6/19/2016 6:14:58 PM, ILoveSitarMusic wrote:
I had a conflict with a friend two years ago, and I desire to make peace. We are both Christian, and the Bible says to make peace when conflicts arise. How do I do this?

There's a lot of factors that go into this, like: who close, what happened, why did this happen, etc... There are many ways you can go about mending the relationship, but it just depends on how it happened to how you address it.
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Syko
Posts: 393
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6/20/2016 11:57:48 AM
Posted: 5 months ago
At 6/19/2016 7:27:11 PM, bballcrook21 wrote:
At 6/19/2016 7:26:02 PM, ILoveSitarMusic wrote:
At 6/19/2016 7:24:29 PM, bballcrook21 wrote:
At 6/19/2016 7:18:09 PM, ILoveSitarMusic wrote:
At 6/19/2016 6:55:30 PM, bballcrook21 wrote:
At 6/19/2016 6:14:58 PM, ILoveSitarMusic wrote:
I had a conflict with a friend two years ago, and I desire to make peace. We are both Christian, and the Bible says to make peace when conflicts arise. How do I do this?

You do it by not posting stupid crap in the forums.
Reported for trolling.

I'm shaking in my boots.
Youy need to leave this post. I will not tolerat a troll.

But you will tolerate 4th grade grammar skills?

You excel at being a jerk, if you're trying to make a point here.
For Mother Russia.
Wylted
Posts: 21,167
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6/21/2016 12:49:39 AM
Posted: 5 months ago
At 6/19/2016 7:18:09 PM, ILoveSitarMusic wrote:
At 6/19/2016 6:55:30 PM, bballcrook21 wrote:
At 6/19/2016 6:14:58 PM, ILoveSitarMusic wrote:
I had a conflict with a friend two years ago, and I desire to make peace. We are both Christian, and the Bible says to make peace when conflicts arise. How do I do this?

You do it by not posting stupid crap in the forums.
Reported for trolling.

Trolling is not a violation of rules. Stop abusing the report function or I will report it
Wylted
Posts: 21,167
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6/21/2016 12:50:41 AM
Posted: 5 months ago
At 6/19/2016 7:20:59 PM, ILoveSitarMusic wrote:
At 6/19/2016 7:13:33 PM, Emmarie wrote:
At 6/19/2016 6:14:58 PM, ILoveSitarMusic wrote:
I had a conflict with a friend two years ago, and I desire to make peace. We are both Christian, and the Bible says to make peace when conflicts arise. How do I do this?
It depends on how serious the conflict was. I'd send a handwritten letter, since so much time has passed, highlighting the bond you once had with your friend and your desire to reunite the friendship. Then do a follow up call in like a week if he or she doesn't contact you. Try to focus on the positive aspects of the friendship you once shared, and mention that time has made you realize whatever your fault in the conflict was. If he or she tries to rehash the conflict, than maybe he or she isn't as Christian as they claim to be.

Good idea. I will write a letter. Thank you.

Writing a letter is cowardly. Talk face to face
Wylted
Posts: 21,167
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6/21/2016 12:52:18 AM
Posted: 5 months ago
At 6/19/2016 10:44:35 PM, Adam_Godzilla wrote:
At 6/19/2016 7:13:33 PM, Emmarie wrote:
At 6/19/2016 6:14:58 PM, ILoveSitarMusic wrote:
I had a conflict with a friend two years ago, and I desire to make peace. We are both Christian, and the Bible says to make peace when conflicts arise. How do I do this?
It depends on how serious the conflict was. I'd send a handwritten letter, since so much time has passed, highlighting the bond you once had with your friend and your desire to reunite the friendship. Then do a follow up call in like a week if he or she doesn't contact you. Try to focus on the positive aspects of the friendship you once shared, and mention that time has made you realize whatever your fault in the conflict was. If he or she tries to rehash the conflict, than maybe he or she isn't as Christian as they claim to be.

I just wanted to say, that is some really good advice.

It is horrible. Writing letters when they are available to talk face to face is cowardly
Wylted
Posts: 21,167
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6/21/2016 12:55:03 AM
Posted: 5 months ago
At 6/19/2016 6:14:58 PM, ILoveSitarMusic wrote:
I had a conflict with a friend two years ago, and I desire to make peace. We are both Christian, and the Bible says to make peace when conflicts arise. How do I do this?

Don't talk to them if you have not forgiven them or are not willing to bite your tongue if they falsely blame you. I am not saying cave to their world view, but allow them to have it
Emmarie
Posts: 1,907
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6/21/2016 2:02:01 AM
Posted: 5 months ago
At 6/21/2016 12:50:41 AM, Wylted wrote:
At 6/19/2016 7:20:59 PM, ILoveSitarMusic wrote:
At 6/19/2016 7:13:33 PM, Emmarie wrote:
At 6/19/2016 6:14:58 PM, ILoveSitarMusic wrote:
I had a conflict with a friend two years ago, and I desire to make peace. We are both Christian, and the Bible says to make peace when conflicts arise. How do I do this?
It depends on how serious the conflict was. I'd send a handwritten letter, since so much time has passed, highlighting the bond you once had with your friend and your desire to reunite the friendship. Then do a follow up call in like a week if he or she doesn't contact you. Try to focus on the positive aspects of the friendship you once shared, and mention that time has made you realize whatever your fault in the conflict was. If he or she tries to rehash the conflict, than maybe he or she isn't as Christian as they claim to be.

Good idea. I will write a letter. Thank you.

Writing a letter is cowardly. Talk face to face
It's not cowardly, it is considerate. I showed up at a friends home to try to mend a friendship that was estranged, and she acted like nothing ever happened, but her body language was different. She was put on the spot to be cordial, but had no real interest in remaining friends. Too much had happened since we had last spoken, and life's experiences had changed both of us. Writing a letter is a way to avoid making the other person feel awkward. At least in a letter you can address your own shortcomings. Just approaching someone face to face and bringing up the conflict could inconvenience the person you'd like to make amends to.

Phone calls are "phoney". Text messages are too casual, online is out of the question because it's too convienent. A handwritten letter shows thoughtfulness and allows the other person the option of ignoring it without awkwardness.
Wylted
Posts: 21,167
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6/21/2016 2:36:15 AM
Posted: 5 months ago
At 6/21/2016 2:02:01 AM, Emmarie wrote:
At 6/21/2016 12:50:41 AM, Wylted wrote:
At 6/19/2016 7:20:59 PM, ILoveSitarMusic wrote:
At 6/19/2016 7:13:33 PM, Emmarie wrote:
At 6/19/2016 6:14:58 PM, ILoveSitarMusic wrote:
I had a conflict with a friend two years ago, and I desire to make peace. We are both Christian, and the Bible says to make peace when conflicts arise. How do I do this?
It depends on how serious the conflict was. I'd send a handwritten letter, since so much time has passed, highlighting the bond you once had with your friend and your desire to reunite the friendship. Then do a follow up call in like a week if he or she doesn't contact you. Try to focus on the positive aspects of the friendship you once shared, and mention that time has made you realize whatever your fault in the conflict was. If he or she tries to rehash the conflict, than maybe he or she isn't as Christian as they claim to be.

Good idea. I will write a letter. Thank you.

Writing a letter is cowardly. Talk face to face
It's not cowardly, it is considerate. I showed up at a friends home to try to mend a friendship that was estranged, and she acted like nothing ever happened, but her body language was different. She was put on the spot to be cordial, but had no real interest in remaining friends. Too much had happened since we had last spoken, and life's experiences had changed both of us. Writing a letter is a way to avoid making the other person feel awkward. At least in a letter you can address your own shortcomings. Just approaching someone face to face and bringing up the conflict could inconvenience the person you'd like to make amends to.

Phone calls are "phoney". Text messages are too casual, online is out of the question because it's too convienent. A handwritten letter shows thoughtfulness and allows the other person the option of ignoring it without awkwardness.

Sounds like you are just trying to avoid feeling awkward yourself. I bet her body language told you a lot more than a letter where she can hide her feelings easier does. You say in a letter you can atleast address ypur own shortcomings, so why not in person?

Why not knock on that door and sat "hey Susie, I know in the past I have been a complete piece of crap, but I really value your friendship and am scared of death of losing it. Would you like to grab a coffee some time? Can you ever forgive me?"
Emmarie
Posts: 1,907
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6/21/2016 2:47:27 AM
Posted: 5 months ago
At 6/21/2016 2:36:15 AM, Wylted wrote:
At 6/21/2016 2:02:01 AM, Emmarie wrote:
At 6/21/2016 12:50:41 AM, Wylted wrote:
At 6/19/2016 7:20:59 PM, ILoveSitarMusic wrote:
At 6/19/2016 7:13:33 PM, Emmarie wrote:
At 6/19/2016 6:14:58 PM, ILoveSitarMusic wrote:
I had a conflict with a friend two years ago, and I desire to make peace. We are both Christian, and the Bible says to make peace when conflicts arise. How do I do this?
It depends on how serious the conflict was. I'd send a handwritten letter, since so much time has passed, highlighting the bond you once had with your friend and your desire to reunite the friendship. Then do a follow up call in like a week if he or she doesn't contact you. Try to focus on the positive aspects of the friendship you once shared, and mention that time has made you realize whatever your fault in the conflict was. If he or she tries to rehash the conflict, than maybe he or she isn't as Christian as they claim to be.

Good idea. I will write a letter. Thank you.

Writing a letter is cowardly. Talk face to face
It's not cowardly, it is considerate. I showed up at a friends home to try to mend a friendship that was estranged, and she acted like nothing ever happened, but her body language was different. She was put on the spot to be cordial, but had no real interest in remaining friends. Too much had happened since we had last spoken, and life's experiences had changed both of us. Writing a letter is a way to avoid making the other person feel awkward. At least in a letter you can address your own shortcomings. Just approaching someone face to face and bringing up the conflict could inconvenience the person you'd like to make amends to.

Phone calls are "phoney". Text messages are too casual, online is out of the question because it's too convienent. A handwritten letter shows thoughtfulness and allows the other person the option of ignoring it without awkwardness.

Sounds like you are just trying to avoid feeling awkward yourself. I bet her body language told you a lot more than a letter where she can hide her feelings easier does. You say in a letter you can atleast address ypur own shortcomings, so why not in person?

Why not knock on that door and sat "hey Susie, I know in the past I have been a complete piece of crap, but I really value your friendship and am scared of death of losing it. Would you like to grab a coffee some time? Can you ever forgive me?"
WTF are you talking about? I did knock on the door, and her facial expression was like wtf are you doing here.
Neither one of us had ever violated one another that caused the friendship to sour. A third party ignited drama, and caused all my friends to turn their backs on me, after I moved like 175 miles away. I went back home to visit and everyone was cold to me. The same person also spread rumors about me here, in a town where gossip spreads like wildfire, so people are standoffish to me here as well. I've learned to give people their space, and if they believe lies about me more than what they know about me from interacting with me, than there's nothing I can do about it.

The worst thing is I don't even know wtf I supposedly did, people won't tell me why they changed toward me.
Wylted
Posts: 21,167
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6/21/2016 2:54:59 AM
Posted: 5 months ago
WTF are you talking about? I did knock on the door, and her facial expression was like wtf are you doing here.

Yep, and you would have never seem that facial expression and know her true feelings if she hid them in a letted.
Neither one of us had ever violated one another that caused the friendship to sour. A third party ignited drama, and caused all my friends to turn their backs on me, after I moved like 175 miles away. I went back home to visit and everyone was cold to me. The same person also spread rumors about me here, in a town where gossip spreads like wildfire, so people are standoffish to me here as well. I've learned to give people their space, and if they believe lies about me more than what they know about me from interacting with me, than there's nothing I can do about it.

The worst thing is I don't even know wtf I supposedly did, people won't tell me why they changed toward me.

Fvck em, if they believe rumors their friendship is not valuable anyway.
Emmarie
Posts: 1,907
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6/21/2016 3:22:23 AM
Posted: 5 months ago
At 6/21/2016 2:54:59 AM, Wylted wrote:
WTF are you talking about? I did knock on the door, and her facial expression was like wtf are you doing here.

Yep, and you would have never seem that facial expression and know her true feelings if she hid them in a letted.
Neither one of us had ever violated one another that caused the friendship to sour. A third party ignited drama, and caused all my friends to turn their backs on me, after I moved like 175 miles away. I went back home to visit and everyone was cold to me. The same person also spread rumors about me here, in a town where gossip spreads like wildfire, so people are standoffish to me here as well. I've learned to give people their space, and if they believe lies about me more than what they know about me from interacting with me, than there's nothing I can do about it.

The worst thing is I don't even know wtf I supposedly did, people won't tell me why they changed toward me.

Fvck em, if they believe rumors their friendship is not valuable anyway.
I wouldn't say fvck em though, I wish them joy and love. They are people that I loved.
The ironic thing is that the guy who badmouthed me thought I would change and become cold hearted and mean spirited, like he is, if I had no friends, but i haven't - so I disproved him, that he was cold hearted due to him being misunderstood and that he had no friends. I also learned that I never had friends to begin with so he kinda did me a favor.
Rightreform
Posts: 190
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6/22/2016 2:39:49 AM
Posted: 5 months ago
At 6/19/2016 11:13:28 PM, ILoveSitarMusic wrote:
At 6/19/2016 10:57:54 PM, Omniscient_Debater wrote:
At 6/19/2016 7:26:02 PM, ILoveSitarMusic wrote:
At 6/19/2016 7:24:29 PM, bballcrook21 wrote:
At 6/19/2016 7:18:09 PM, ILoveSitarMusic wrote:
At 6/19/2016 6:55:30 PM, bballcrook21 wrote:
At 6/19/2016 6:14:58 PM, ILoveSitarMusic wrote:
I had a conflict with a friend two years ago, and I desire to make peace. We are both Christian, and the Bible says to make peace when conflicts arise. How do I do this?

You do it by not posting stupid crap in the forums.
Reported for trolling.

I'm shaking in my boots.
Youy need to leave this post. I will not tolerat a troll.

He's not a troll, Bballcrook is a serious member from what I have read, and I assure that you he doesn't tell you this to piss you off or get a laugh.
Yes he is a troll. His first comment was a troll comment.

There are four ways to contend with people:
1.Ignore them
2Assign them to someone else, such as a spouse, colleague, parent, or friend, and hope that this person will be our knight and defend us from our problems.
3. Contend with them irrationally-spontaneously combusting and grimacing at each new glitch.
4. Face our situations head-on, approaching them logically and thoughtfully, with preparedness and thoroughness.


BBallcrook21 chooses number 3
Emmarie is right, and more mature encouraging you to choose number 4
and I am proud of you for choosing this route and trying to make peace. You did not simply choose to ignore the problem or let anyone else handle it for you. And thankfully you would not act as bballcrook21 Who is said to be highly respected! HA! But you handled him using number 4 again. Great job!