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'Twas the Night Before Cliff-mas

DoubtingDave
Posts: 380
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12/28/2012 9:30:44 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
I saw this poem while reading through The Heritage Foundation which I got to tour today.



"Twas the night before Cliff-mas, and all through the House
Not a member was working, no ideal to espouse;
Their offices closed, the members all gone,
No solution for a budget plan had yet to be drawn.

Our Congress had spent a year feuding again,
While uncertainty and poor growth plagued businessmen;
The economy had slowed, unemployment was high,
Things weren"t looking up for a taxpayer, like I.

On December 31st tax rates were scheduled to rise,
Which many agreed was not in itself wise.
With this, another date caught the country"s fiscal fixation"
The second of January was set for across-the-board sequestration.

I"d heard all the talk, all the senators saying,
"If we"re spending this much, someone has to be paying!"
The rhetoric from the news droned on in my head,
As I turned off my light, and crawled into bed.

When out on the Mall there arose such a clatter,
I sprang from my bed to see what was the matter.
It was the President! His sudden arrival was thrilling,
He went after the Congress, he called them by building:

"Now, Senate! Now, Hart! Now, Russell and Dirksen!
On House! on Rayburn! on, Longworth and Cannon!
The fiscal cliff is approaching! We need to make cuts!
Bad policy and spending got us into this rut!"

Out came the lawmakers, their cheeks from sleep rosy,
I saw Boehner, Reid, McConnell and Pelosi;
They gathered together, their eyes straight ahead,
Some seemed optimistic, as the president said:

"We need to end this uncertainty, if we are to stay strong,
I know we can do it, if we all get along.
We won"t hurt the middle class, we"ll raise taxes on the wealthy!
It"s right for everyone to pay a fair share to keep our economy healthy!"

Reid stepped up as well, his voice rather hoarse,
"We know that we need to include a few cuts, of course.
This deficit spending hurts our economy in the long-run,
But for now, raising some taxes will help everyone!"

"Now hold on one minute," Boehner said with a sigh,
"You know the tax increase you propose is too high!
The wealthy you speak of"they aren"t you and me;
They"re middle-class, and small business owners you see!"

"You won"t close the tax loopholes, you won"t lower our debt!
You"ll create a situation where new investors will sweat!
We need tax reform, to resolve all this clutter!"
He stepped back with a nod"the crowd started to mutter.

Was he right? Was it true? Could reform solve it all?
Or would a tax hike spur investment and keep us from a fall?
It was the same talk I"d heard, the same from before"
So I ran down the stairs, and I opened the door:

"You say you"ll manage the tax code, and cut wasteful spending,
But it"s these political struggles that keep our economy pending!
We need real reform, not this spending obsession;
"Else this cliff should put us in another recession!"

The lawmakers started, they had not known I was there;
And they sputtered and scattered and ran without care;
I watched them go and yelled after them, as they took flight:
"Avoid the fiscal cliff for all, and to YOU a good-night!"
The Great Wall of Fail

"I have doubts that anti-semitism even exists" -GeoLaureate8

"Evolutionists think that people evolved from rocks" -Scotty

"And whats so bad about a Holy war? By Holy war, I mean a war which would aim to subdue others under Islam." -Ahmed.M

"The free market didn't create the massive wealth in the country, WW2 did." -malcomxy

"Independant federal regulators make our capitalist society possible." -Erik_Erikson
DoubtingDave
Posts: 380
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12/28/2012 9:31:07 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
LINK http://blog.heritage.org...
The Great Wall of Fail

"I have doubts that anti-semitism even exists" -GeoLaureate8

"Evolutionists think that people evolved from rocks" -Scotty

"And whats so bad about a Holy war? By Holy war, I mean a war which would aim to subdue others under Islam." -Ahmed.M

"The free market didn't create the massive wealth in the country, WW2 did." -malcomxy

"Independant federal regulators make our capitalist society possible." -Erik_Erikson
TheElderScroll
Posts: 643
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12/28/2012 10:13:24 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
At 12/28/2012 9:31:07 PM, DoubtingDave wrote:
LINK http://blog.heritage.org...

Nice. Try another one:

Two beloved political parties, both alike in dignity,
In fair Washington D.C., where we lay our scene,
From ancient grudge break to new mutiny,
Where civil blood makes civil hands unclean.
From forth the fatal loins of these two foes
A pair of star-cross'd lovers take their "life";
Whose misadventur'd piteous overthrows
Doth with their reelection loss bury their parties' strife.
16kadams
Posts: 10,497
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12/28/2012 10:14:47 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
At 12/28/2012 10:13:24 PM, TheElderScroll wrote:
At 12/28/2012 9:31:07 PM, DoubtingDave wrote:
LINK http://blog.heritage.org...

Nice. Try another one:

Two beloved political parties, both alike in dignity,
In fair Washington D.C., where we lay our scene,
From ancient grudge break to new mutiny,
Where civil blood makes civil hands unclean.
From forth the fatal loins of these two foes
A pair of star-cross'd lovers take their "life";
Whose misadventur'd piteous overthrows
Doth with their reelection loss bury their parties' strife.

I had to memorize the original one for English last year. I hated that book >.<

Clever, though.
https://www.youtube.com...
https://rekonomics.wordpress.com...
"A trend is a trend, but the question is, will it bend? Will it alter its course through some unforeseen force and come to a premature end?" -- Alec Cairncross
TheElderScroll
Posts: 643
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12/28/2012 10:21:59 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
At 12/28/2012 10:14:47 PM, 16kadams wrote:
At 12/28/2012 10:13:24 PM, TheElderScroll wrote:
At 12/28/2012 9:31:07 PM, DoubtingDave wrote:
LINK http://blog.heritage.org...

Nice. Try another one:

Two beloved political parties, both alike in dignity,
In fair Washington D.C., where we lay our scene,
From ancient grudge break to new mutiny,
Where civil blood makes civil hands unclean.
From forth the fatal loins of these two foes
A pair of star-cross'd lovers take their "life";
Whose misadventur'd piteous overthrows
Doth with their reelection loss bury their parties' strife.

I had to memorize the original one for English last year. I hated that book >.<

Clever, though.

The Tragedy of Romeo and Juliet turns out to be the misery of many students.
But still, the play is highly entertaining. The most memorable line (I believe) is:
She doth teach the torches to burn bright!