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Jesus

lovelife
Posts: 14,629
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9/18/2010 9:39:19 PM
Posted: 6 years ago
For the purpose of this topic lets assume that
1) Jesus was real
2) Son of God
3) Born of the virgin Mary
4) Mary really was a virgin

Now I want to know, if Jesus was born now, what do you think the paternity test would show?
Without Royal there is a hole inside of me, I have no choice but to leave
InsertNameHere
Posts: 15,699
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9/18/2010 9:42:20 PM
Posted: 6 years ago
"Are you a virgin?" "Yes. I think I'm pregnant." "Wha...?!" *pregnancy test* "Holy sh*t! It's true!" "Yes it's holy, yes it is."

Just a lame attempt to be funny. >.< I fail, I know.
Korashk
Posts: 4,597
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9/18/2010 10:32:45 PM
Posted: 6 years ago
http://en.wikipedia.org...
When large numbers of otherwise-law abiding people break specific laws en masse, it's usually a fault that lies with the law. - Unknown
Puck
Posts: 6,457
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9/18/2010 10:45:23 PM
Posted: 6 years ago
At 9/18/2010 10:38:39 PM, lovelife wrote:
I was expecting creative answers...

As opposed to ones dealing with reality? :P
InsertNameHere
Posts: 15,699
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9/18/2010 10:48:43 PM
Posted: 6 years ago
At 9/18/2010 10:47:37 PM, badger wrote:
At 9/18/2010 10:46:38 PM, badger wrote:
i'd be the father.

joke :)

Yea, we all know God is the father. ;)

Lrn2Theology
lovelife
Posts: 14,629
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9/18/2010 10:49:56 PM
Posted: 6 years ago
At 9/18/2010 10:45:23 PM, Puck wrote:
At 9/18/2010 10:38:39 PM, lovelife wrote:
I was expecting creative answers...

As opposed to ones dealing with reality? :P

Exactly. Reality surrounds us daily, I want some non-reality sometimes too. And I have no interesting fiction books at the moment.
Without Royal there is a hole inside of me, I have no choice but to leave
lovelife
Posts: 14,629
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9/18/2010 10:50:28 PM
Posted: 6 years ago
At 9/18/2010 10:49:56 PM, lovelife wrote:
At 9/18/2010 10:45:23 PM, Puck wrote:
At 9/18/2010 10:38:39 PM, lovelife wrote:
I was expecting creative answers...

As opposed to ones dealing with reality? :P

Exactly. Reality surrounds us daily, I want some non-reality sometimes too. And I have no interesting fiction books at the moment.

And thus religion was born, lmao.
Without Royal there is a hole inside of me, I have no choice but to leave
the-good-teacher
Posts: 444
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9/19/2010 3:38:58 AM
Posted: 6 years ago
At 9/18/2010 9:39:19 PM, lovelife wrote:
For the purpose of this topic lets assume that
1) Jesus was real
2) Son of God
3) Born of the virgin Mary
4) Mary really was a virgin

Now I want to know, if Jesus was born now, what do you think the paternity test would show?

------------
Reply.

I believe this is exactly what the tests will show.

Chromosome count "24" - 23 from the Mother, 1 from the father "Y" (boy)

this is an impossible count, 46 is normal, 23 from each parent, I believe 44 can be found in cases of down syndrome children,

The count would show that Jesus did not have an earthly Father.

-------------------------------o O--^5 ----
Cerebral_Narcissist
Posts: 10,806
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9/19/2010 7:23:43 AM
Posted: 6 years ago
At 9/18/2010 9:39:19 PM, lovelife wrote:
For the purpose of this topic lets assume that
1) Jesus was real
2) Son of God
3) Born of the virgin Mary
4) Mary really was a virgin

Now I want to know, if Jesus was born now, what do you think the paternity test would show?

Well that depends.

Is the substance of Jesus, such as his DNA divine? Or is it simply that his soul is divine? If it is siimply his soul when why do we have the nonsense ideas that sin is inherited down the male line and indeed the transubstantiation. The eating of the flesh and blood of christ, yet another intellectual piece of utter nonsense that we have to accept on the top of a whole bunch of nonsensical ideas.

So anyway, the DNA would either show he was solely the product of his mother. Or simply that he had a father, or that half his DNA was wierd God DNA.

In the first case there would be cries of hoax, mass conversions and people saying things like... well snakes can do it. If he had normal DNA from a 'father' the claims would be denied. If he had God DNA we would have proof of God... or aliens or somesuch!
I am voting for Innomen because of his intelligence, common sense, humility and the fact that Juggle appears to listen to him. Any other Presidential style would have a large sub-section of the site up in arms. If I was President I would destroy the site though elitism, others would let it run riot. Innomen represents a middle way that works, neither draconian nor anarchic and that is the only way things can work. Plus he does it all without ego trips.
lovelife
Posts: 14,629
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9/19/2010 8:14:15 AM
Posted: 6 years ago
At 9/19/2010 7:23:43 AM, Cerebral_Narcissist wrote:
At 9/18/2010 9:39:19 PM, lovelife wrote:
For the purpose of this topic lets assume that
1) Jesus was real
2) Son of God
3) Born of the virgin Mary
4) Mary really was a virgin

Now I want to know, if Jesus was born now, what do you think the paternity test would show?

Well that depends.

Is the substance of Jesus, such as his DNA divine? Or is it simply that his soul is divine? If it is siimply his soul when why do we have the nonsense ideas that sin is inherited down the male line and indeed the transubstantiation. The eating of the flesh and blood of christ, yet another intellectual piece of utter nonsense that we have to accept on the top of a whole bunch of nonsensical ideas.

So anyway, the DNA would either show he was solely the product of his mother. Or simply that he had a father, or that half his DNA was wierd God DNA.

In the first case there would be cries of hoax, mass conversions and people saying things like... well snakes can do it. If he had normal DNA from a 'father' the claims would be denied. If he had God DNA we would have proof of God... or aliens or somesuch!

What would god DNA look like? What would it do? And how would it affect him?
Without Royal there is a hole inside of me, I have no choice but to leave
SuperRobotWars
Posts: 3,906
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9/19/2010 9:26:38 AM
Posted: 6 years ago
Jesus is pronounced hey-seus!
(and black)
Minister Of Trolling
: At 12/6/2011 2:21:41 PM, badger wrote:
: ugly people should beat beautiful people ugly. simple! you'd be killing two birds with the one stone... women like violent men and you're making yourself more attractive, relatively. i met a blonde dude who was prettier than me not so long ago. he's not so pretty now! ha!
:
: ...and well, he wasn't really prettier than me. he just had nice hair.
I-am-a-panda
Posts: 15,380
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9/19/2010 9:30:58 AM
Posted: 6 years ago
At 9/19/2010 9:26:38 AM, SuperRobotWars wrote:
Jesus is pronounced hey-seus!
(and black)

?
Pizza. I have enormous respect for Pizza.
Cerebral_Narcissist
Posts: 10,806
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9/19/2010 9:53:56 AM
Posted: 6 years ago
At 9/19/2010 8:14:15 AM, lovelife wrote:
At 9/19/2010 7:23:43 AM, Cerebral_Narcissist wrote:
At 9/18/2010 9:39:19 PM, lovelife wrote:
For the purpose of this topic lets assume that
1) Jesus was real
2) Son of God
3) Born of the virgin Mary
4) Mary really was a virgin

Now I want to know, if Jesus was born now, what do you think the paternity test would show?

Well that depends.

Is the substance of Jesus, such as his DNA divine? Or is it simply that his soul is divine? If it is siimply his soul when why do we have the nonsense ideas that sin is inherited down the male line and indeed the transubstantiation. The eating of the flesh and blood of christ, yet another intellectual piece of utter nonsense that we have to accept on the top of a whole bunch of nonsensical ideas.

So anyway, the DNA would either show he was solely the product of his mother. Or simply that he had a father, or that half his DNA was wierd God DNA.

In the first case there would be cries of hoax, mass conversions and people saying things like... well snakes can do it. If he had normal DNA from a 'father' the claims would be denied. If he had God DNA we would have proof of God... or aliens or somesuch!

What would god DNA look like? What would it do? And how would it affect him?

No idea. That is like asking someone what a magic horse would eat for breakfast!
I am voting for Innomen because of his intelligence, common sense, humility and the fact that Juggle appears to listen to him. Any other Presidential style would have a large sub-section of the site up in arms. If I was President I would destroy the site though elitism, others would let it run riot. Innomen represents a middle way that works, neither draconian nor anarchic and that is the only way things can work. Plus he does it all without ego trips.
PARADIGM_L0ST
Posts: 6,958
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9/19/2010 10:29:39 AM
Posted: 6 years ago
At 9/18/2010 9:39:19 PM, lovelife wrote:
For the purpose of this topic lets assume that
1) Jesus was real
2) Son of God
3) Born of the virgin Mary
4) Mary really was a virgin

Now I want to know, if Jesus was born now, what do you think the paternity test would show?:

No one here could know, so it's pointless to even speculate.
"Have you ever considered suicide? If not, please do." -- Mouthwash (to Inferno)