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Why do crazy atheists have terrible beards?

Skepsikyma
Posts: 8,927
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3/2/2016 8:27:16 PM
Posted: 1 year ago
In my experience, as a general rule, the more hardcore an atheist is, the more hideous and misshapen their beard becomes (if they have one). The same often holds true for some religious sects.

Would anyone like to hazard a guess as to why this is? Is God afflicting those who anger him with terrible facial hair? Is this proof that Catholicism is the true faith? Most popes seem to have excellent personal grooming habits.

Exhibit A: http://i.ytimg.com... <- this man looks like the bad guy from Pocahontas.

Christopher Hitchens also had a brief, disastrous flirtation with facial hair.

Exhibit B: https://sp.yimg.com... vs. http://seekershub.org... (Bin-Bayyah seems to have discovered trimmers, while Osama died before doing so.)
"See now Oblivion shimmering all around us, its very tranquility deadlier than tempest. How little all our keels have troubled it."
- Lord Dunsany -

"Over her head the stars, the thoughts of God in the heavens,
Shone on the eyes of man, who had ceased to marvel and worship"
- Henry Longfellow -

"We enjoy, we see nothing by direct vision; but only by reflection, and in anatomical dismemberment."
- Thomas Carlyle -
DanneJeRusse
Posts: 13,644
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3/2/2016 8:34:24 PM
Posted: 1 year ago
At 3/2/2016 8:27:16 PM, Skepsikyma wrote:
In my experience, as a general rule, the more hardcore an atheist is, the more hideous and misshapen their beard becomes (if they have one). The same often holds true for some religious sects.

Would anyone like to hazard a guess as to why this is? Is God afflicting those who anger him with terrible facial hair? Is this proof that Catholicism is the true faith? Most popes seem to have excellent personal grooming habits.

Exhibit A: http://i.ytimg.com... <- this man looks like the bad guy from Pocahontas.

Christopher Hitchens also had a brief, disastrous flirtation with facial hair.

Exhibit B: https://sp.yimg.com... vs. http://seekershub.org... (Bin-Bayyah seems to have discovered trimmers, while Osama died before doing so.)

Maybe, it's the brains v. beauty adage, most have one or the other while few have both.
Marrying a 6 year old and waiting until she reaches puberty and maturity before having consensual sex is better than walking up to
a stranger in a bar and proceeding to have relations with no valid proof of the intent of the person. Muhammad wins. ~ Fatihah
If they don't want to be killed then they have to subdue to the Islamic laws. - Uncung
There would be peace if you obeyed us.~Uncung
Without God, you are lower than sh!t. ~ SpiritandTruth
matt8800
Posts: 2,333
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3/3/2016 2:51:20 AM
Posted: 1 year ago
At 3/2/2016 8:27:16 PM, Skepsikyma wrote:
In my experience, as a general rule, the more hardcore an atheist is, the more hideous and misshapen their beard becomes (if they have one). The same often holds true for some religious sects.

Would anyone like to hazard a guess as to why this is? Is God afflicting those who anger him with terrible facial hair? Is this proof that Catholicism is the true faith? Most popes seem to have excellent personal grooming habits.

Exhibit A: http://i.ytimg.com... <- this man looks like the bad guy from Pocahontas.

Christopher Hitchens also had a brief, disastrous flirtation with facial hair.

Exhibit B: https://sp.yimg.com... vs. http://seekershub.org... (Bin-Bayyah seems to have discovered trimmers, while Osama died before doing so.)

You realize that Jesus had a beard, right? lol
Skepsikyma
Posts: 8,927
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3/3/2016 2:55:53 AM
Posted: 1 year ago
At 3/3/2016 2:51:20 AM, matt8800 wrote:
At 3/2/2016 8:27:16 PM, Skepsikyma wrote:
In my experience, as a general rule, the more hardcore an atheist is, the more hideous and misshapen their beard becomes (if they have one). The same often holds true for some religious sects.

Would anyone like to hazard a guess as to why this is? Is God afflicting those who anger him with terrible facial hair? Is this proof that Catholicism is the true faith? Most popes seem to have excellent personal grooming habits.

Exhibit A: http://i.ytimg.com... <- this man looks like the bad guy from Pocahontas.

Christopher Hitchens also had a brief, disastrous flirtation with facial hair.

Exhibit B: https://sp.yimg.com... vs. http://seekershub.org... (Bin-Bayyah seems to have discovered trimmers, while Osama died before doing so.)

You realize that Jesus had a beard, right? lol

We don't have any historically accurate depictions of that beard, though. I can't really judge its relative fabulousness.
"See now Oblivion shimmering all around us, its very tranquility deadlier than tempest. How little all our keels have troubled it."
- Lord Dunsany -

"Over her head the stars, the thoughts of God in the heavens,
Shone on the eyes of man, who had ceased to marvel and worship"
- Henry Longfellow -

"We enjoy, we see nothing by direct vision; but only by reflection, and in anatomical dismemberment."
- Thomas Carlyle -
Skepsikyma
Posts: 8,927
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3/3/2016 2:58:47 AM
Posted: 1 year ago
Seriuosly though... this is just eerie

Aron Ra: http://www.skepticmoney.com...

Governor Ratcliffe: http://img14.deviantart.net...
"See now Oblivion shimmering all around us, its very tranquility deadlier than tempest. How little all our keels have troubled it."
- Lord Dunsany -

"Over her head the stars, the thoughts of God in the heavens,
Shone on the eyes of man, who had ceased to marvel and worship"
- Henry Longfellow -

"We enjoy, we see nothing by direct vision; but only by reflection, and in anatomical dismemberment."
- Thomas Carlyle -
Double_R
Posts: 4,886
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3/3/2016 3:13:12 AM
Posted: 1 year ago
At 3/2/2016 8:27:16 PM, Skepsikyma wrote:
In my experience, as a general rule, the more hardcore an atheist is, the more hideous and misshapen their beard becomes (if they have one). The same often holds true for some religious sects.

Would anyone like to hazard a guess as to why this is? Is God afflicting those who anger him with terrible facial hair? Is this proof that Catholicism is the true faith? Most popes seem to have excellent personal grooming habits.

Exhibit A: http://i.ytimg.com... <- this man looks like the bad guy from Pocahontas.

Christopher Hitchens also had a brief, disastrous flirtation with facial hair.

Exhibit B: https://sp.yimg.com... vs. http://seekershub.org... (Bin-Bayyah seems to have discovered trimmers, while Osama died before doing so.)

Oh yea well theists have small penis's. Allow me to prove it...

[insert photos of a few random theists with a small penis's]

See? Assertion proven.
Skepsikyma
Posts: 8,927
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3/3/2016 3:22:15 AM
Posted: 1 year ago
At 3/3/2016 3:13:12 AM, Double_R wrote:
At 3/2/2016 8:27:16 PM, Skepsikyma wrote:
In my experience, as a general rule, the more hardcore an atheist is, the more hideous and misshapen their beard becomes (if they have one). The same often holds true for some religious sects.

Would anyone like to hazard a guess as to why this is? Is God afflicting those who anger him with terrible facial hair? Is this proof that Catholicism is the true faith? Most popes seem to have excellent personal grooming habits.

Exhibit A: http://i.ytimg.com... <- this man looks like the bad guy from Pocahontas.

Christopher Hitchens also had a brief, disastrous flirtation with facial hair.

Exhibit B: https://sp.yimg.com... vs. http://seekershub.org... (Bin-Bayyah seems to have discovered trimmers, while Osama died before doing so.)

Oh yea well theists have small penis's. Allow me to prove it...

[insert photos of a few random theists with a small penis's]

See? Assertion proven.

I've performed extensive sampling, and I haven't found a statistically significant correlation either way.
"See now Oblivion shimmering all around us, its very tranquility deadlier than tempest. How little all our keels have troubled it."
- Lord Dunsany -

"Over her head the stars, the thoughts of God in the heavens,
Shone on the eyes of man, who had ceased to marvel and worship"
- Henry Longfellow -

"We enjoy, we see nothing by direct vision; but only by reflection, and in anatomical dismemberment."
- Thomas Carlyle -
Double_R
Posts: 4,886
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3/3/2016 3:24:50 AM
Posted: 1 year ago
At 3/3/2016 3:22:15 AM, Skepsikyma wrote:
At 3/3/2016 3:13:12 AM, Double_R wrote:
At 3/2/2016 8:27:16 PM, Skepsikyma wrote:
In my experience, as a general rule, the more hardcore an atheist is, the more hideous and misshapen their beard becomes (if they have one). The same often holds true for some religious sects.

Would anyone like to hazard a guess as to why this is? Is God afflicting those who anger him with terrible facial hair? Is this proof that Catholicism is the true faith? Most popes seem to have excellent personal grooming habits.

Exhibit A: http://i.ytimg.com... <- this man looks like the bad guy from Pocahontas.

Christopher Hitchens also had a brief, disastrous flirtation with facial hair.

Exhibit B: https://sp.yimg.com... vs. http://seekershub.org... (Bin-Bayyah seems to have discovered trimmers, while Osama died before doing so.)

Oh yea well theists have small penis's. Allow me to prove it...

[insert photos of a few random theists with a small penis's]

See? Assertion proven.

I've performed extensive sampling, and I haven't found a statistically significant correlation either way.

But we have some photos, so it must be true.
Skepsikyma
Posts: 8,927
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3/3/2016 3:25:54 AM
Posted: 1 year ago
At 3/3/2016 3:24:50 AM, Double_R wrote:
At 3/3/2016 3:22:15 AM, Skepsikyma wrote:
At 3/3/2016 3:13:12 AM, Double_R wrote:
Oh yea well theists have small penis's. Allow me to prove it...

[insert photos of a few random theists with a small penis's]

See? Assertion proven.

I've performed extensive sampling, and I haven't found a statistically significant correlation either way.

But we have some photos, so it must be true.

I can't take your work for it until I've examined the evidence personally.
"See now Oblivion shimmering all around us, its very tranquility deadlier than tempest. How little all our keels have troubled it."
- Lord Dunsany -

"Over her head the stars, the thoughts of God in the heavens,
Shone on the eyes of man, who had ceased to marvel and worship"
- Henry Longfellow -

"We enjoy, we see nothing by direct vision; but only by reflection, and in anatomical dismemberment."
- Thomas Carlyle -
Skepticalone
Posts: 6,547
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3/3/2016 4:35:23 AM
Posted: 1 year ago
At 3/2/2016 8:27:16 PM, Skepsikyma wrote:
In my experience, as a general rule, the more hardcore an atheist is, the more hideous and misshapen their beard becomes (if they have one). The same often holds true for some religious sects.

Would anyone like to hazard a guess as to why this is? Is God afflicting those who anger him with terrible facial hair? Is this proof that Catholicism is the true faith? Most popes seem to have excellent personal grooming habits.

Exhibit A: http://i.ytimg.com... <- this man looks like the bad guy from Pocahontas.

Christopher Hitchens also had a brief, disastrous flirtation with facial hair.

Exhibit B: https://sp.yimg.com... vs. http://seekershub.org... (Bin-Bayyah seems to have discovered trimmers, while Osama died before doing so.)

/me examines beard

It's not THAT terrible... ;-)
The moment you declare a set of ideas to be immune from criticism, satire, derision, or contempt, freedom of thought becomes impossible. - Salman Rushdie

The whole problem with the world is that fools and fanatics are always so certain of themselves, and wiser people so full of doubts. - Bertrand Russell
desmac
Posts: 5,078
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3/3/2016 8:06:31 AM
Posted: 1 year ago
Why do crazy atheists have terrible beards?

For the same reason crazy theists have beards, They are crazy.
ironslippers
Posts: 545
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3/3/2016 8:59:35 AM
Posted: 1 year ago
alopecia is an indicator of the ability to reason
Everyone stands on their own dung hill and speaks out about someone else's - Nathan Krusemark
Its easier to criticize and hate than it is to support and create - I Ron Slippers
desmac
Posts: 5,078
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3/3/2016 9:24:32 AM
Posted: 1 year ago
At 3/3/2016 8:59:35 AM, ironslippers wrote:
alopecia is an indicator of the ability to reason

Do you have any citations to back up this bald assertion?
TREssspa
Posts: 567
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3/3/2016 9:32:19 AM
Posted: 1 year ago
Why do crazy atheists have terrible beards?
__________
'Cause they are crazy'
- TREssspa, masturabator nay masterquoter, DDO.
dee-em
Posts: 7,441
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3/3/2016 10:17:11 AM
Posted: 1 year ago
Are the dwarves in The Hobbit atheists? Because there is some serious beard work going on there.
Fatihah: It's like your mother making spaghetti and after you taste it and don't like it, you say "well my mom must not exist". Not because their is no logical evidence but because she doesn't do what you want.
Skepsikyma
Posts: 8,927
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3/3/2016 4:37:01 PM
Posted: 1 year ago
At 3/3/2016 10:17:11 AM, dee-em wrote:
Are the dwarves in The Hobbit atheists? Because there is some serious beard work going on there.

No, they follow Aule, Vala of the forge and craftsmen, who formed them from the stone against the wishes of Eru Iluvatar.
"See now Oblivion shimmering all around us, its very tranquility deadlier than tempest. How little all our keels have troubled it."
- Lord Dunsany -

"Over her head the stars, the thoughts of God in the heavens,
Shone on the eyes of man, who had ceased to marvel and worship"
- Henry Longfellow -

"We enjoy, we see nothing by direct vision; but only by reflection, and in anatomical dismemberment."
- Thomas Carlyle -
Skepsikyma
Posts: 8,927
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3/3/2016 4:37:37 PM
Posted: 1 year ago
At 3/3/2016 9:24:32 AM, desmac wrote:
At 3/3/2016 8:59:35 AM, ironslippers wrote:
alopecia is an indicator of the ability to reason

Do you have any citations to back up this bald assertion?

Frankly, I find the evidence to be quite appallingly thin.
"See now Oblivion shimmering all around us, its very tranquility deadlier than tempest. How little all our keels have troubled it."
- Lord Dunsany -

"Over her head the stars, the thoughts of God in the heavens,
Shone on the eyes of man, who had ceased to marvel and worship"
- Henry Longfellow -

"We enjoy, we see nothing by direct vision; but only by reflection, and in anatomical dismemberment."
- Thomas Carlyle -
Skepsikyma
Posts: 8,927
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3/3/2016 4:39:00 PM
Posted: 1 year ago
At 3/3/2016 5:10:17 AM, RuvDraba wrote:
At 3/2/2016 8:27:16 PM, Skepsikyma wrote:
Is this proof that Catholicism is the true faith?

I think it's proof that the only true faith is Sikhism

Unlike Catholics [http://1899281406.rsc.cdn77.org...], Muslims [http://molempire.com...] and Hasidic Jews [http://www.freewilliamsburg.com...], Sikhs [http://www.buzzfeed.com...] have all the beard buff.

[https://mulattodiaries.files.wordpress.com...]

This is the best proof of God's existence that I've ever seen: https://img.buzzfeed.com...
"See now Oblivion shimmering all around us, its very tranquility deadlier than tempest. How little all our keels have troubled it."
- Lord Dunsany -

"Over her head the stars, the thoughts of God in the heavens,
Shone on the eyes of man, who had ceased to marvel and worship"
- Henry Longfellow -

"We enjoy, we see nothing by direct vision; but only by reflection, and in anatomical dismemberment."
- Thomas Carlyle -
RuvDraba
Posts: 6,033
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3/3/2016 6:16:39 PM
Posted: 1 year ago
At 3/3/2016 4:39:00 PM, Skepsikyma wrote:
At 3/3/2016 5:10:17 AM, RuvDraba wrote:
At 3/2/2016 8:27:16 PM, Skepsikyma wrote:
Is this proof that Catholicism is the true faith?
I think it's proof that the only true faith is Sikhism
Unlike Catholics [http://1899281406.rsc.cdn77.org...], Muslims [http://molempire.com...] and Hasidic Jews [http://www.freewilliamsburg.com...], Sikhs [http://www.buzzfeed.com...] have all the beard buff.
[https://mulattodiaries.files.wordpress.com...]

This is the best proof of God's existence that I've ever seen: https://img.buzzfeed.com...

Further down the same page, Skeps, is a gentleman trying very hard to be the guy Ali G takes off, by out-bearding him: [https://img.buzzfeed.com...]

Which leads me to ask, as I'm sure has also occurred to you:

How much of the authority of faith comes from trading on celebrity? How much from historical revisionism? I think the Beard asks these questions by its very existence in a way that an unhirsute mouth alone cannot ask in thousands of words.

Food for thought... or at least a place to catch the food for thought should you miss it the first time.
brontoraptor
Posts: 11,685
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3/4/2016 2:16:35 AM
Posted: 1 year ago
At 3/2/2016 8:27:16 PM, Skepsikyma wrote:
In my experience, as a general rule, the more hardcore an atheist is, the more hideous and misshapen their beard becomes (if they have one). The same often holds true for some religious sects.

Would anyone like to hazard a guess as to why this is? Is God afflicting those who anger him with terrible facial hair? Is this proof that Catholicism is the true faith? Most popes seem to have excellent personal grooming habits.

Exhibit A: http://i.ytimg.com... <- this man looks like the bad guy from Pocahontas.

Christopher Hitchens also had a brief, disastrous flirtation with facial hair.

Exhibit B: https://sp.yimg.com... vs. http://seekershub.org... (Bin-Bayyah seems to have discovered trimmers, while Osama died before doing so.)

We need to see Jesus and see what beard or lack of beard He sports. Clean beard? Then God likes clean beard. Bityy bit of beard, then God likes bitty bit of beard. No beard....
"What Donald Trump is doing is representing the absolute heartbreak, and anger, and frustration at a government gone mad."

http://youtu.be...
RoderickSpode
Posts: 2,674
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3/4/2016 6:09:40 PM
Posted: 1 year ago
At 3/2/2016 8:27:16 PM, Skepsikyma wrote:
In my experience, as a general rule, the more hardcore an atheist is, the more hideous and misshapen their beard becomes (if they have one). The same often holds true for some religious sects.

Would anyone like to hazard a guess as to why this is? Is God afflicting those who anger him with terrible facial hair? Is this proof that Catholicism is the true faith? Most popes seem to have excellent personal grooming habits.

Exhibit A: http://i.ytimg.com... <- this man looks like the bad guy from Pocahontas.

Christopher Hitchens also had a brief, disastrous flirtation with facial hair.

Exhibit B: https://sp.yimg.com... vs. http://seekershub.org... (Bin-Bayyah seems to have discovered trimmers, while Osama died before doing so.)
I think it may be an ongoing school of thought that having a long beard, no matter how bad looks, is (for the lack of a better term) cool. For an atheist, it looks intellectual, for a Muslim, more traditional, etc.

Kind of like the old school of thought that just having long hair is cool. That's why if you look at an old movie made in the 70's, or older high school yearbook photos you might notice males with awful looking long hair. Ugly cowlicks, lopsided parted hair, etc. Back then, they apparently thought just because their hair was long it must've been cool. Eventually many people figured out that this is not the case, and if someone has bad hair, best to keep it nice and short. Apparently this concept hasn't hit the beard scene yet.