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Does Age Really Matter?

lil_Oreo
Posts: 61
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6/21/2009 1:27:21 AM
Posted: 7 years ago
does age really matter? cant a 13 go out waith a 16.
or a 16 go out with a 20? does it really matter?


(I saw this question posted on a different site and was hoping to get some opinions, but nobody really gave one)

So what do you think?
When the Power of Love overcomes the Love of Power, the world will know Peace.
Lexicaholic
Posts: 526
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6/21/2009 1:43:41 AM
Posted: 7 years ago
At 6/21/2009 1:27:21 AM, lil_Oreo wrote:
does age really matter? cant a 13 go out waith a 16.
or a 16 go out with a 20? does it really matter?


(I saw this question posted on a different site and was hoping to get some opinions, but nobody really gave one)

So what do you think?

Difficult question. I would say that age does matter if you want a lasting relationship, because those who share age also share some common experiences due to cultural immersion in similar times.

Morally, it matters only to the extent that there is the danger of one person using experience or force of personality to dominate or manipulate the other ... though I see that often enough in same age relationships. I would imagine that at some point along the continuum we could do comparisons of relative cognition, such as Piaget did, and find some point at which the likelihood of a harmful relationship between the two individuals is greater than the likelihood of a mutually beneficial relationship and should be discouraged. That task I will leave to someone more personally invested than I.
http://mastersofcreationrpg.com... - My new site and long-developed project. Should be fun.
Rezzealaux
Posts: 2,251
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6/21/2009 1:59:36 AM
Posted: 7 years ago
"Does Age Really Matter?"

Things only matter if you think they do.
Does age matter to you? There's your answer.
: If you weren't new here, you'd know not to feed me such attention. This is like an orgasm in my brain right now. *hehe, my name is in a title, hehe* (http://www.debate.org...)

Just in case I get into some BS with FREEDO again about how he's NOT a narcissist.

"The law is there to destroy evil under the constitutional government."
So... what's there to destroy evil inside of and above the constitutional government?
lil_Oreo
Posts: 61
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6/21/2009 3:22:00 AM
Posted: 7 years ago
At 6/21/2009 1:59:36 AM, Rezzealaux wrote:
"Does Age Really Matter?"

Things only matter if you think they do.
Does age matter to you? There's your answer.

Actually, age does matter to me. Alot. I honestly think its rather (um) questionable when an older guy or girl is in a relationship with someone 3 or 4 years younger than them. It sort of makes me wonder what's wrong with them if they can't find someone they're own age to be with.

-btw, this isn't a personal question(or situation), i just thought it was an interesting topic-
When the Power of Love overcomes the Love of Power, the world will know Peace.
Lexicaholic
Posts: 526
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6/21/2009 3:34:15 AM
Posted: 7 years ago
At 6/21/2009 1:59:36 AM, Rezzealaux wrote:
"Does Age Really Matter?"

Things only matter if you think they do.
Does age matter to you? There's your answer.

Absolute self-interest, eh? No interest in justification for why you would believe something?
http://mastersofcreationrpg.com... - My new site and long-developed project. Should be fun.
Lexicaholic
Posts: 526
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6/21/2009 3:39:09 AM
Posted: 7 years ago
At 6/21/2009 3:22:00 AM, lil_Oreo wrote:
At 6/21/2009 1:59:36 AM, Rezzealaux wrote:
"Does Age Really Matter?"

Things only matter if you think they do.
Does age matter to you? There's your answer.

Actually, age does matter to me. Alot. I honestly think its rather (um) questionable when an older guy or girl is in a relationship with someone 3 or 4 years younger than them. It sort of makes me wonder what's wrong with them if they can't find someone they're own age to be with.

3 to 4 years? I'm actually fine with five years up or down. Futurists in higher age categories may have more in common with younger generations than they would with their less considerate same age peers. What is wrong with someone may be exactly what makes someone right for someone else.

Of course, looking at your profile I see you are handling it from a different age category from where I am, and would have perfectly valid concerns if one of your peers was involved with someone significantly more experienced by consequence of the age difference. It levels off after a while.
http://mastersofcreationrpg.com... - My new site and long-developed project. Should be fun.
lil_Oreo
Posts: 61
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6/21/2009 3:49:29 AM
Posted: 7 years ago
At 6/21/2009 3:39:09 AM, Lexicaholic wrote:

Of course, looking at your profile I see you are handling it from a different age category from where I am, and would have perfectly valid concerns if one of your peers was involved with someone significantly more experienced by consequence of the age difference. It levels off after a while.

True, true. I was referring to people 20 and under. Sorry, forgot to mention that.
When the Power of Love overcomes the Love of Power, the world will know Peace.
s0m31john
Posts: 1,879
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6/21/2009 5:03:36 AM
Posted: 7 years ago
I don't see too much of a problem. Although I wouldn't approve of younger people (13-17) having physical relationships. But that's just because I'm a bitter 18 year old that's never even held a girl's hand. ;_;
Rezzealaux
Posts: 2,251
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6/21/2009 10:39:09 AM
Posted: 7 years ago
At 6/21/2009 3:34:15 AM, Lexicaholic wrote:
At 6/21/2009 1:59:36 AM, Rezzealaux wrote:
"Does Age Really Matter?"

Things only matter if you think they do.
Does age matter to you? There's your answer.

Absolute self-interest, eh? No interest in justification for why you would believe something?

Any justification for anything will eventually end up having the form "Because I want X". Science would be "Because I want accurate depictions of the natural world." Philosophy would be "Because I want integrity and happiness". Might as well cut the crap and jump straight to the point - Debate *IS* about truth, isn't it? ;)
: If you weren't new here, you'd know not to feed me such attention. This is like an orgasm in my brain right now. *hehe, my name is in a title, hehe* (http://www.debate.org...)

Just in case I get into some BS with FREEDO again about how he's NOT a narcissist.

"The law is there to destroy evil under the constitutional government."
So... what's there to destroy evil inside of and above the constitutional government?
Danielle
Posts: 21,330
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6/21/2009 11:14:06 AM
Posted: 7 years ago
If you're referring to people aged 20 and younger, then yes, age makes a difference. Speaking broadly, I'd imagine that a 2 year age different maximum is probably what is "most healthy." This is not only because of one's maturity but also their life experiences and goals. An 18 year old may be ready to have sex while a 16 year old may not. Plus, having an older partner may increase situations of various pressures being induced upon the younger individual, etc.
President of DDO
Danielle
Posts: 21,330
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6/21/2009 11:15:02 AM
Posted: 7 years ago
At 6/21/2009 5:03:36 AM, s0m31john wrote:
I don't see too much of a problem. Although I wouldn't approve of younger people (13-17) having physical relationships. But that's just because I'm a bitter 18 year old that's never even held a girl's hand. ;_;

Well maybe if you stopped being such a douche... ... ...
President of DDO
Ragnar_Rahl
Posts: 19,297
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6/21/2009 11:21:12 AM
Posted: 7 years ago
Am I a douche too?
It came to be at its height. It was commanded to command. It was a capital before its first stone was laid. It was a monument to the spirit of man.
Rezzealaux
Posts: 2,251
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6/21/2009 11:23:55 AM
Posted: 7 years ago
At 6/21/2009 11:21:12 AM, Ragnar_Rahl wrote:
Am I a douche too?

And then, the first thought in my head was "R_R is trying to hit on L".
: If you weren't new here, you'd know not to feed me such attention. This is like an orgasm in my brain right now. *hehe, my name is in a title, hehe* (http://www.debate.org...)

Just in case I get into some BS with FREEDO again about how he's NOT a narcissist.

"The law is there to destroy evil under the constitutional government."
So... what's there to destroy evil inside of and above the constitutional government?
Lexicaholic
Posts: 526
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6/21/2009 12:59:38 PM
Posted: 7 years ago
At 6/21/2009 10:39:09 AM, Rezzealaux wrote:
At 6/21/2009 3:34:15 AM, Lexicaholic wrote:
At 6/21/2009 1:59:36 AM, Rezzealaux wrote:
"Does Age Really Matter?"

Things only matter if you think they do.
Does age matter to you? There's your answer.

Absolute self-interest, eh? No interest in justification for why you would believe something?

Any justification for anything will eventually end up having the form "Because I want X". Science would be "Because I want accurate depictions of the natural world." Philosophy would be "Because I want integrity and happiness". Might as well cut the crap and jump straight to the point - Debate *IS* about truth, isn't it? ;)

Oh, I agree with you that "because I want X" is the reason. The question becomes: "What objective do I seek to accomplish with X?" If I want to recover from an illness, and am convinced that snake oil is the cure, then my want is not being rationally met by my method. So saying I should take snake oil because I want to isn't enough ... I need to think about what I want to accomplish with the snake oil to know whether or not I should.
http://mastersofcreationrpg.com... - My new site and long-developed project. Should be fun.
Rezzealaux
Posts: 2,251
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6/21/2009 1:14:15 PM
Posted: 7 years ago
At 6/21/2009 12:59:38 PM, Lexicaholic wrote:
At 6/21/2009 10:39:09 AM, Rezzealaux wrote:
At 6/21/2009 3:34:15 AM, Lexicaholic wrote:
At 6/21/2009 1:59:36 AM, Rezzealaux wrote:
"Does Age Really Matter?"

Things only matter if you think they do.
Does age matter to you? There's your answer.

Absolute self-interest, eh? No interest in justification for why you would believe something?

Any justification for anything will eventually end up having the form "Because I want X". Science would be "Because I want accurate depictions of the natural world." Philosophy would be "Because I want integrity and happiness". Might as well cut the crap and jump straight to the point - Debate *IS* about truth, isn't it? ;)

Oh, I agree with you that "because I want X" is the reason. The question becomes: "What objective do I seek to accomplish with X?" If I want to recover from an illness, and am convinced that snake oil is the cure, then my want is not being rationally met by my method. So saying I should take snake oil because I want to isn't enough ... I need to think about what I want to accomplish with the snake oil to know whether or not I should.

Aaaand I have no idea what OP is trying to accomplish.
: If you weren't new here, you'd know not to feed me such attention. This is like an orgasm in my brain right now. *hehe, my name is in a title, hehe* (http://www.debate.org...)

Just in case I get into some BS with FREEDO again about how he's NOT a narcissist.

"The law is there to destroy evil under the constitutional government."
So... what's there to destroy evil inside of and above the constitutional government?
Lexicaholic
Posts: 526
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6/21/2009 2:00:54 PM
Posted: 7 years ago
At 6/21/2009 1:14:15 PM, Rezzealaux wrote:

Aaaand I have no idea what OP is trying to accomplish.

Heh, OP was looking for justifications for dating older and younger people. Admittedly, a justification comes down to a question of "Why do you care?" OP stated why she cared ... she was worried that young people could be taken advantage of by older people. Therefore, OP's objective was that young people not be taken advantage of, and the question is whether or not an age difference tends to lead to young people being taken advantage of. If it doesn't, OP couldn't have an argument against it. If it does, she does. I guess we should look up statistics on sexual offenses and inter-age dating.
http://mastersofcreationrpg.com... - My new site and long-developed project. Should be fun.
wjmelements
Posts: 8,206
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6/21/2009 2:05:04 PM
Posted: 7 years ago
God is not omnipotent.

"And the LORD was with Judah; and he drave out the inhabitants of the mountain; but could not drive out the inhabitants of the valley, because they had chariots of iron." - Judges 1:19

I know this isn't the place for this, but I feel this quote is out of place. "he" is lower case and obviously referring to Judah.
in the blink of an eye you finally see the light
feverish
Posts: 2,716
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6/21/2009 2:06:19 PM
Posted: 7 years ago
At 6/21/2009 1:27:21 AM, lil_Oreo wrote:
cant a 13 go out waith a 16.

No.

or a 16 go out with a 20? does it really matter?

Yes. (imo)

I think under 16s should stick pretty much to their own year groups as there is likely to be a big difference in physical as well as emotional development.

I think by 16 (the age of consent in the UK) most people are likely to be as physically mature and in many cases as emotionally responsible as any other young adult.
It depends on the individuals but as I think Lexicaholic said age is not necessarily a factor in whether a relationship is emotionally abusive or appropriate. 5 years would seem to me a sensible upward gap for a mature 16 year-old and it probably gets wider as you get older.

I think it would be perfectly acceptable for a youthful 30 year-old woman to go out with a mature 20-year old man and visa versa. A 30 year-old with a 45 year-old, 40 with 60, 70 with 100, maybe there's an equation for this stuff.

Catherine Zeta-Jones and Michael Douglas, Cameron Diaz and Justin Timberlake, Demi Moore and Ashton whatsit, they're all at it. It may look gross sometimes but if they're happy, who's to stop them?
patsox834
Posts: 406
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6/21/2009 2:13:22 PM
Posted: 7 years ago
At 6/21/2009 11:15:02 AM, theLwerd wrote:
At 6/21/2009 5:03:36 AM, s0m31john wrote:
I don't see too much of a problem. Although I wouldn't approve of younger people (13-17) having physical relationships. But that's just because I'm a bitter 18 year old that's never even held a girl's hand. ;_;

Well maybe if you stopped being such a douche... ... ...

Heh heh...amusing.

Self-pity tends to lead to self-loathing. Just sayin'.
patsox834
Posts: 406
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6/21/2009 2:19:52 PM
Posted: 7 years ago
At 6/21/2009 11:21:12 AM, Ragnar_Rahl wrote:
Am I a douche too?

http://www.wordreference.com...

I can quite confidently say that you're not a shower, considering that a shower doesn't possess any characteristics which would allow it to take advantage of any means which are available for typing...

That was a douchey answer, eh?

....
Rezzealaux
Posts: 2,251
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6/21/2009 2:45:09 PM
Posted: 7 years ago
At 6/21/2009 2:00:54 PM, Lexicaholic wrote:
[...]Therefore, OP's objective was that young people not be taken advantage of, and the question is whether or not an age difference tends to lead to young people being taken advantage of.[...]

So are we talking about making a law?

At 6/21/2009 2:05:04 PM, wjmelements wrote:
I know this isn't the place for this, but I feel this quote is out of place. "he" is lower case and obviously referring to Judah.

And obviously, the LORD was with Judah until he started losing. Then He had nothing to do with the matter. Yes, running away is how God keeps his 100.00% win ratio. Such omnipotence is to be feared and respected.
: If you weren't new here, you'd know not to feed me such attention. This is like an orgasm in my brain right now. *hehe, my name is in a title, hehe* (http://www.debate.org...)

Just in case I get into some BS with FREEDO again about how he's NOT a narcissist.

"The law is there to destroy evil under the constitutional government."
So... what's there to destroy evil inside of and above the constitutional government?
Logical-Master
Posts: 2,538
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6/21/2009 2:54:58 PM
Posted: 7 years ago
At 6/21/2009 3:34:15 AM, Lexicaholic wrote:
At 6/21/2009 1:59:36 AM, Rezzealaux wrote:
"Does Age Really Matter?"

Things only matter if you think they do.
Does age matter to you? There's your answer.

Absolute self-interest, eh? No interest in justification for why you would believe something?

I would go about saying that you or I are no more "self-interested" than he is. :D
To add: He is absolutely correct. "Matter" (in the context used here) is entirely dependent on how you are physically or mentally effected by something. Nevertheless, I'm pretty sure the topic was made to gather a general consensus of what people think rather than to discuss if something objectively "matters."
Lexicaholic
Posts: 526
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6/21/2009 5:47:35 PM
Posted: 7 years ago
At 6/21/2009 2:45:09 PM, Rezzealaux wrote:
At 6/21/2009 2:00:54 PM, Lexicaholic wrote:
[...]Therefore, OP's objective was that young people not be taken advantage of, and the question is whether or not an age difference tends to lead to young people being taken advantage of.[...]

So are we talking about making a law?

Not necessarily. Rather just determining if there is a rational relationship between age difference and accomplishing the objective so that we could posit a law. Making a law requires years of painful consideration.

And obviously, the LORD was with Judah until he started losing. Then He had nothing to do with the matter. Yes, running away is how God keeps his 100.00% win ratio. Such omnipotence is to be feared and respected.
XD sigged.
http://mastersofcreationrpg.com... - My new site and long-developed project. Should be fun.
Rezzealaux
Posts: 2,251
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6/21/2009 6:18:41 PM
Posted: 7 years ago
At 6/21/2009 5:47:35 PM, Lexicaholic wrote:
Not necessarily. Rather just determining if there is a rational relationship between age difference and accomplishing the objective so that we could posit a law. Making a law requires years of painful consideration.

Age probably does matter if we're talking about the common definition of "taking advantage", but I'd be against a law about it. People should figure out for themselves if it's a good idea to be in a relationship with someone whose age is clearly different from theirs. It'd be better protection for them, in a sense - they have to be on guard at all times. There's a city-load of evidence showing that less laws means more safety: in Drachten, the removal of traffic lights have reduced the amount of accidents, and increased the speed of flow of traffic. We can at least rationally suspect that the same situation - that is, less laws means more safety - would hold for relationships.

http://www.telegraph.co.uk...

Then again, I'm against all laws. But that's a story for another topic, another day.
: If you weren't new here, you'd know not to feed me such attention. This is like an orgasm in my brain right now. *hehe, my name is in a title, hehe* (http://www.debate.org...)

Just in case I get into some BS with FREEDO again about how he's NOT a narcissist.

"The law is there to destroy evil under the constitutional government."
So... what's there to destroy evil inside of and above the constitutional government?
pcmbrown
Posts: 198
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7/13/2009 12:15:55 PM
Posted: 7 years ago
At 6/21/2009 5:03:36 AM, s0m31john wrote:
I don't see too much of a problem. Although I wouldn't approve of younger people (13-17) having physical relationships. But that's just because I'm a bitter 18 year old that's never even held a girl's hand. ;_;

go on some sort of '40 Year-Old Virgin'esque quest
"Did I shock you with this discovery.? Of curse not..!!"-banker