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lovelife
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8/16/2010 8:45:26 PM
Posted: 6 years ago
For lack of a better word (I know its there can;t think of it tho) anyway I'm having an internal deate over if parents keeping tabs on every site you go to and everything you post, every account you have, everyone you talk to, as a teen is an infringement of rights.

On one side the vast majority of stuff is not their business. If I wanna rant about how I can't stand something about them, and take the steps I would for anybody else I would rant about I don't see why they should be able to find out anyway and make me feel like I have no where to turn.

On the other side I see there are dangers on the internet

On the first side why is it their business if I wanna look at porn?

On the second side, maybe some porn sites would try to pressure you into illegal acts.

On the first side not being exposed to the risks could harm you further later IRL, its important to know what the dangers are, how they ACTUALLY appear (not dramatizations of it), and how to avoid them without someone watching and controlling your every move.

and so on and so forth.

So what do you all believe, cause this is confusing me.
Without Royal there is a hole inside of me, I have no choice but to leave
Puck
Posts: 6,457
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8/17/2010 3:03:32 AM
Posted: 6 years ago
At 8/16/2010 8:45:26 PM, lovelife wrote:
For lack of a better word (I know its there can;t think of it tho) anyway I'm having an internal deate over if parents keeping tabs on every site you go to and everything you post, every account you have, everyone you talk to, as a teen is an infringement of rights.

What right are we talking about?

I'm presuming this is their internet access payed by them that you are using. Bad parenting arguably for sure, violation of rights, meh. 'Right' to privacy is a adjunct to property rights, if it's your computer then it's presumably force that's being employed in one aspect or another (force is the violation). If it's not then once again we are back to meh. :P
Cerebral_Narcissist
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8/17/2010 3:11:25 AM
Posted: 6 years ago
We do accord children full human rights of self-determination because they are children. As the child ages we relax this, granting them certain rights on the way onto full adult hood.

I would not allow a young child to have anything to do with the internet, this will relax over time but I can imagine the early teen years would still involve a 'family' computer in a communal area with another adult present and for say something like an hour a day. No webcam facility, no online pictures.

But then I am probably going to be more strict than most.
I am voting for Innomen because of his intelligence, common sense, humility and the fact that Juggle appears to listen to him. Any other Presidential style would have a large sub-section of the site up in arms. If I was President I would destroy the site though elitism, others would let it run riot. Innomen represents a middle way that works, neither draconian nor anarchic and that is the only way things can work. Plus he does it all without ego trips.
I-am-a-panda
Posts: 15,380
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8/17/2010 4:10:21 AM
Posted: 6 years ago
At 8/16/2010 8:45:26 PM, lovelife wrote:

On the second side, maybe some porn sites would try to pressure you into illegal acts.

What is this I don't even.

How can a porn site pressure you into an illegal act? When I watch Porn there isn't a banner saying "I dare you to try a dp" or " You should shark joggers in your local park".

Regardless of it being your computer, I'm fairly sure it's your parents internet, so they have the right to restrict you from whatever they want. As for me, as long as you have AVG and use Google, I would let you do whatever you want on the Internet. If you get a virus, it's your problem an your responsibility to get rid of.
Pizza. I have enormous respect for Pizza.
nonentity
Posts: 5,008
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8/17/2010 11:21:39 AM
Posted: 6 years ago
At 8/17/2010 4:10:21 AM, I-am-a-panda wrote:
At 8/16/2010 8:45:26 PM, lovelife wrote:

On the second side, maybe some porn sites would try to pressure you into illegal acts.

What is this I don't even.

How can a porn site pressure you into an illegal act?


LOL!
lovelife
Posts: 14,629
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8/17/2010 11:40:16 AM
Posted: 6 years ago
At 8/17/2010 3:03:32 AM, Puck wrote:
At 8/16/2010 8:45:26 PM, lovelife wrote:
For lack of a better word (I know its there can;t think of it tho) anyway I'm having an internal deate over if parents keeping tabs on every site you go to and everything you post, every account you have, everyone you talk to, as a teen is an infringement of rights.

What right are we talking about?

I'm presuming this is their internet access payed by them that you are using. Bad parenting arguably for sure, violation of rights, meh. 'Right' to privacy is a adjunct to property rights, if it's your computer then it's presumably force that's being employed in one aspect or another (force is the violation). If it's not then once again we are back to meh. :P

Keystroke logs and the such.

Yes it is my computer I got it from my dad for my 8th bday. (ps he isn't one of the ones that are here)
Without Royal there is a hole inside of me, I have no choice but to leave
lovelife
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8/17/2010 11:42:55 AM
Posted: 6 years ago
At 8/17/2010 3:11:25 AM, Cerebral_Narcissist wrote:
We do accord children full human rights of self-determination because they are children. As the child ages we relax this, granting them certain rights on the way onto full adult hood.

I would not allow a young child to have anything to do with the internet, this will relax over time but I can imagine the early teen years would still involve a 'family' computer in a communal area with another adult present and for say something like an hour a day. No webcam facility, no online pictures.

But then I am probably going to be more strict than most.

My parents do the opposite. The older I am the more restrictions. I can't post pics of me or anything actually cause it could possibly be linked to me, but she can post pics of me on fb and then tag me in them.
Without Royal there is a hole inside of me, I have no choice but to leave
lovelife
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8/17/2010 11:46:53 AM
Posted: 6 years ago
At 8/17/2010 4:10:21 AM, I-am-a-panda wrote:
At 8/16/2010 8:45:26 PM, lovelife wrote:

On the second side, maybe some porn sites would try to pressure you into illegal acts.

What is this I don't even.


idk never been to a porn site so idk wtf their all about (besides porn)
its like 4chan I have no cle what its about beyond stupidity.

How can a porn site pressure you into an illegal act? When I watch Porn there isn't a banner saying "I dare you to try a dp" or " You should shark joggers in your local park".

Regardless of it being your computer, I'm fairly sure it's your parents internet, so they have the right to restrict you from whatever they want. As for me, as long as you have AVG and use Google, I would let you do whatever you want on the Internet. If you get a virus, it's your problem an your responsibility to get rid of.

I was just wondering if it was right for them to do such. Not if they have the right.
Parents have the right to indoctrininate their children. That doesn't make it right.
Parents have the right to keep their children locked up away from the world as long as they give them 3 meals a day. I wouldn't say thats right either.
Without Royal there is a hole inside of me, I have no choice but to leave
I-am-a-panda
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8/17/2010 11:53:50 AM
Posted: 6 years ago
At 8/17/2010 11:46:53 AM, lovelife wrote:
At 8/17/2010 4:10:21 AM, I-am-a-panda wrote:
At 8/16/2010 8:45:26 PM, lovelife wrote:

On the second side, maybe some porn sites would try to pressure you into illegal acts.

What is this I don't even.


idk never been to a porn site so idk wtf their all about (besides porn)
its like 4chan I have no cle what its about beyond stupidity.


How can a porn site pressure you into an illegal act? When I watch Porn there isn't a banner saying "I dare you to try a dp" or " You should shark joggers in your local park".

Regardless of it being your computer, I'm fairly sure it's your parents internet, so they have the right to restrict you from whatever they want. As for me, as long as you have AVG and use Google, I would let you do whatever you want on the Internet. If you get a virus, it's your problem an your responsibility to get rid of.

I was just wondering if it was right for them to do such. Not if they have the right.
Parents have the right to indoctrininate their children. That doesn't make it right.
Parents have the right to keep their children locked up away from the world as long as they give them 3 meals a day. I wouldn't say thats right either.

I gave my view and what should be done.
Pizza. I have enormous respect for Pizza.
Cerebral_Narcissist
Posts: 10,806
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8/17/2010 12:05:04 PM
Posted: 6 years ago
At 8/17/2010 11:42:55 AM, lovelife wrote:
At 8/17/2010 3:11:25 AM, Cerebral_Narcissist wrote:
We do accord children full human rights of self-determination because they are children. As the child ages we relax this, granting them certain rights on the way onto full adult hood.

I would not allow a young child to have anything to do with the internet, this will relax over time but I can imagine the early teen years would still involve a 'family' computer in a communal area with another adult present and for say something like an hour a day. No webcam facility, no online pictures.

But then I am probably going to be more strict than most.

My parents do the opposite. The older I am the more restrictions. I can't post pics of me or anything actually cause it could possibly be linked to me, but she can post pics of me on fb and then tag me in them.

I am hoping to start off strict and ease up with time. If I keep track of their internet history I will tell them first, I dont want to use key loggers though.
I am voting for Innomen because of his intelligence, common sense, humility and the fact that Juggle appears to listen to him. Any other Presidential style would have a large sub-section of the site up in arms. If I was President I would destroy the site though elitism, others would let it run riot. Innomen represents a middle way that works, neither draconian nor anarchic and that is the only way things can work. Plus he does it all without ego trips.
lovelife
Posts: 14,629
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8/17/2010 12:09:25 PM
Posted: 6 years ago
At 8/17/2010 12:05:04 PM, Cerebral_Narcissist wrote:
At 8/17/2010 11:42:55 AM, lovelife wrote:
At 8/17/2010 3:11:25 AM, Cerebral_Narcissist wrote:
We do accord children full human rights of self-determination because they are children. As the child ages we relax this, granting them certain rights on the way onto full adult hood.

I would not allow a young child to have anything to do with the internet, this will relax over time but I can imagine the early teen years would still involve a 'family' computer in a communal area with another adult present and for say something like an hour a day. No webcam facility, no online pictures.

But then I am probably going to be more strict than most.

My parents do the opposite. The older I am the more restrictions. I can't post pics of me or anything actually cause it could possibly be linked to me, but she can post pics of me on fb and then tag me in them.

I am hoping to start off strict and ease up with time. If I keep track of their internet history I will tell them first, I dont want to use key loggers though.

Wish I had you as a parent then. The bad part is if I'm on a comp next to theirs and they are like "hey what are you doing?" I'll let them see no problem explain whats going on and just go on with it.
(my stepmom did that. HAd no problem with that scenario)
Its when they get sneaky that I get pissed. Like when my dad stole every account I had that pissed me off.
Without Royal there is a hole inside of me, I have no choice but to leave
Cerebral_Narcissist
Posts: 10,806
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8/17/2010 4:55:24 PM
Posted: 6 years ago
At 8/17/2010 12:09:25 PM, lovelife wrote:
At 8/17/2010 12:05:04 PM, Cerebral_Narcissist wrote:
At 8/17/2010 11:42:55 AM, lovelife wrote:
At 8/17/2010 3:11:25 AM, Cerebral_Narcissist wrote:
We do accord children full human rights of self-determination because they are children. As the child ages we relax this, granting them certain rights on the way onto full adult hood.

I would not allow a young child to have anything to do with the internet, this will relax over time but I can imagine the early teen years would still involve a 'family' computer in a communal area with another adult present and for say something like an hour a day. No webcam facility, no online pictures.

But then I am probably going to be more strict than most.

My parents do the opposite. The older I am the more restrictions. I can't post pics of me or anything actually cause it could possibly be linked to me, but she can post pics of me on fb and then tag me in them.

I am hoping to start off strict and ease up with time. If I keep track of their internet history I will tell them first, I dont want to use key loggers though.

Wish I had you as a parent then. The bad part is if I'm on a comp next to theirs and they are like "hey what are you doing?" I'll let them see no problem explain whats going on and just go on with it.
(my stepmom did that. HAd no problem with that scenario)
Its when they get sneaky that I get pissed. Like when my dad stole every account I had that pissed me off.

Well your parents sound like they may be trying, but well... you know. You are nearly adult, it wont be long until you move out.

The way I look at it I have a right to protect my kids from certain things, but when they are young adults (as in teenagers) they have a right to a certain amount of privacy. My gay son might not be ready to tell me that he is gay for instance, I would not want to find out by look at his MSN logs of private personal conversations. You have to give kids some respect.
I am voting for Innomen because of his intelligence, common sense, humility and the fact that Juggle appears to listen to him. Any other Presidential style would have a large sub-section of the site up in arms. If I was President I would destroy the site though elitism, others would let it run riot. Innomen represents a middle way that works, neither draconian nor anarchic and that is the only way things can work. Plus he does it all without ego trips.
lovelife
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8/17/2010 5:48:19 PM
Posted: 6 years ago
Yep I see your point. I know they have that right, but should they?

I agree wwith the gay son thing. I went out saying I was bi and lez had fake comp sex with other girls just to make him mad if he was reading it without 100% lying.
Without Royal there is a hole inside of me, I have no choice but to leave
PARADIGM_L0ST
Posts: 6,958
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8/18/2010 2:44:51 AM
Posted: 6 years ago
At 8/16/2010 8:45:26 PM, lovelife wrote:
For lack of a better word (I know its there can;t think of it tho) anyway I'm having an internal deate over if parents keeping tabs on every site you go to and everything you post, every account you have, everyone you talk to, as a teen is an infringement of rights.:

Have you given them a reason not to trust you?

On one side the vast majority of stuff is not their business.:

Everything in their house is their business.

On the first side why is it their business if I wanna look at porn?:

Not to sound as if I'm condescending you, but if you're their underage daughter, it is their business. That is very disconcerting for a parent because they know how naive you are by virtue of your age and inexperience with the intricacies of life.

On the first side not being exposed to the risks could harm you further later IRL, its important to know what the dangers are, how they ACTUALLY appear (not dramatizations of it), and how to avoid them without someone watching and controlling your every move.:

The catch-22 is often with overly controlling parents; they end up pushing their kids further towards whatever it is they want to keep them away from. There is a delicate balance in parenthood, and where the line begins and ends is difficult to know, because it needs to be tailored differently for each family.

So what do you all believe, cause this is confusing me.:

It's confusing for everyone. As a parent, and as someone who's been a minor, I have firsthand experience with both. Since I don't know you or your parents, it is difficult to offer good advice because I don't have the details necessary to objectively evaluate it.
"Have you ever considered suicide? If not, please do." -- Mouthwash (to Inferno)
lovelife
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8/18/2010 9:44:28 AM
Posted: 6 years ago
At 8/18/2010 2:44:51 AM, PARADIGM_L0ST wrote:
At 8/16/2010 8:45:26 PM, lovelife wrote:
For lack of a better word (I know its there can;t think of it tho) anyway I'm having an internal deate over if parents keeping tabs on every site you go to and everything you post, every account you have, everyone you talk to, as a teen is an infringement of rights.:

Have you given them a reason not to trust you?


Not really. I'm generally a good kid that hasn't ever done anthing not to be trustworthy. I babysit for them, I cook for them, I clean for them, I don't do drugs, I don't party, I don't have sex, I don't drink, steal, I don't vandalize property, I'm pretty much a good kid. The only thing they might use against me is a year ago when I was being untrusted for no reason at all my dad talked to my bf and that pissed him off and I was accused of sneaking because I didn't tell anyone. Catch 22 tho cause if I told mom she'd tell him and he'd get pissed off and treat me the same way. I know because he told me before I had a bf.

On one side the vast majority of stuff is not their business.:

Everything in their house is their business.


Not always. And thats an argument that really kinda pisses me off. Is the color of underwear I wear their business? Well is my underwear their business at all?

On the first side why is it their business if I wanna look at porn?:

Not to sound as if I'm condescending you, but if you're their underage daughter, it is their business. That is very disconcerting for a parent because they know how naive you are by virtue of your age and inexperience with the intricacies of life.


What do you mean? Its better to look at porn to have curiosity and interest satisfied then possibly getting pregnant.

On the first side not being exposed to the risks could harm you further later IRL, its important to know what the dangers are, how they ACTUALLY appear (not dramatizations of it), and how to avoid them without someone watching and controlling your every move.:

The catch-22 is often with overly controlling parents; they end up pushing their kids further towards whatever it is they want to keep them away from. There is a delicate balance in parenthood, and where the line begins and ends is difficult to know, because it needs to be tailored differently for each family.


Yep thats my main point.

So what do you all believe, cause this is confusing me.:

It's confusing for everyone. As a parent, and as someone who's been a minor, I have firsthand experience with both. Since I don't know you or your parents, it is difficult to offer good advice because I don't have the details necessary to objectively evaluate it.
Without Royal there is a hole inside of me, I have no choice but to leave
Anacharsis
Posts: 139
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8/18/2010 3:29:42 PM
Posted: 6 years ago
It's a very difficult balancing act trying to give your children all the freedom they can handle and which will help them to develop more ability to do things on their own without violating your own sense of safety too far. Certainly all parents get this wrong at some time or another. I sure do. As for them increasing the restrictions as you get older it may be a situation where the things they hear about kids getting into didn't exist, weren't prevalent or just not as dangerous when they were kids. Maybe they never thought about a lot of the issues that you're raising, so when it comes up they have to react. Many people react from fear, especially when it comes to their kids. They are attempting to protect you even if they don't know what they're protecting you from and may even be completely ineffective. It's a sign that they love you.

There may also be dangers that you don't know about in some things. I'll take your example of porn. I know I can't control if my kids really want to look at porn. I can limit it, but that may just make it more enticing. So, I told them plainly that the reason they shouldn't look at such things is that once you get such images in your head it can be hard to get them out and that it tends to twist the way we view people and relationships. It could lead you to do things that would not be the most positive. That's not very tangible, certainly not a physical danger. But I think it's true and it is definitely non-obvious.

You might try explaining why you feel stifled in the current environment and ask what it would take to convince them that they should trust you. Afterall, as the wise parents that they are they must have certainly instilled some amount of wisdom in you, right?

You're the oldest in your family, aren't you? Parents always mess up the most with oldest one. They're learning.
PARADIGM_L0ST
Posts: 6,958
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8/18/2010 4:26:11 PM
Posted: 6 years ago
Everything in their house is their business. : :

Not always. And thats an argument that really kinda pisses me off. Is the color of underwear I wear their business? Well is my underwear their business at all?:

Yes. I know the color of my daughter's underwear because I bought it. There are certain boundaries that family's can establish as the child matures, as a show of solidarity. (Like promising not to read your diary, to show respect for your privacy). But from a legal perspective, the house and all that is in it is the business of the owners.

What do you mean? Its better to look at porn to have curiosity and interest satisfied then possibly getting pregnant.:

Look at it from a parents perspective though. Would a 15-year old boy be looking a porn so he won't have sex? No, he's still gonna be horny every second of the day, regardless of whether or not he masturbates.

Your parents may see your trysts with porn as a pretext to the real deal. I'm not saying it is right or wrong. God knows I was all about porn at your age. I'm just saying, it might cause them to raise an eyebrow.

And just so you know, yes, there is a societal double standard between raising boys and girls. The fact that you are female means they will try and protect you more than your brothers (if you have any). Sad, but true.
"Have you ever considered suicide? If not, please do." -- Mouthwash (to Inferno)
lovelife
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8/18/2010 6:23:17 PM
Posted: 6 years ago
At 8/18/2010 3:29:42 PM, Anacharsis wrote:
It's a very difficult balancing act trying to give your children all the freedom they can handle and which will help them to develop more ability to do things on their own without violating your own sense of safety too far. Certainly all parents get this wrong at some time or another. I sure do. As for them increasing the restrictions as you get older it may be a situation where the things they hear about kids getting into didn't exist, weren't prevalent or just not as dangerous when they were kids. Maybe they never thought about a lot of the issues that you're raising, so when it comes up they have to react. Many people react from fear, especially when it comes to their kids. They are attempting to protect you even if they don't know what they're protecting you from and may even be completely ineffective. It's a sign that they love you.

There may also be dangers that you don't know about in some things. I'll take your example of porn. I know I can't control if my kids really want to look at porn. I can limit it, but that may just make it more enticing. So, I told them plainly that the reason they shouldn't look at such things is that once you get such images in your head it can be hard to get them out and that it tends to twist the way we view people and relationships. It could lead you to do things that would not be the most positive. That's not very tangible, certainly not a physical danger. But I think it's true and it is definitely non-obvious.

You might try explaining why you feel stifled in the current environment and ask what it would take to convince them that they should trust you. Afterall, as the wise parents that they are they must have certainly instilled some amount of wisdom in you, right?

You're the oldest in your family, aren't you? Parents always mess up the most with oldest one. They're learning.

I see what your saying and thats more or less how I'm stuck.

Yes I'm the oldest of 5 kids. 3 bros one sis and she's a twin. The oldest is 8.

Lol yeah I can be immature at times. Like one day I had to get up at 4 am so I wouldn't go to sleep because a little sleep is worse than none.

My dad saw that as me trying to sneak on the comp and do "bad things" so he made me stay downstairs and disconnected the internet. My responce was to play my music as loud as possible in my room directly under his room while I was in the other room reading a book.

Immature and after about 10 mins I saw it was wrong and turned it off.
Without Royal there is a hole inside of me, I have no choice but to leave
lovelife
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8/18/2010 6:26:46 PM
Posted: 6 years ago
At 8/18/2010 4:26:11 PM, PARADIGM_L0ST wrote:
Everything in their house is their business. : :

Not always. And thats an argument that really kinda pisses me off. Is the color of underwear I wear their business? Well is my underwear their business at all?:

Yes. I know the color of my daughter's underwear because I bought it. There are certain boundaries that family's can establish as the child matures, as a show of solidarity. (Like promising not to read your diary, to show respect for your privacy). But from a legal perspective, the house and all that is in it is the business of the owners.


Thats creepy. I hate when parents buy their kids underwear. It makes me feel like I don't even have privacy in the most intamite part of my body.

What do you mean? Its better to look at porn to have curiosity and interest satisfied then possibly getting pregnant.:

Look at it from a parents perspective though. Would a 15-year old boy be looking a porn so he won't have sex? No, he's still gonna be horny every second of the day, regardless of whether or not he masturbates.


Not trying to keep him away from porn might help tho. Just look at INH's example of like Saudia Arabia and all the gay people.

Your parents may see your trysts with porn as a pretext to the real deal. I'm not saying it is right or wrong. God knows I was all about porn at your age. I'm just saying, it might cause them to raise an eyebrow.


They should know thats not me. ps the only porn I ever saw was one they left on in their room when they had me go in there to baby sit at 3 am.

And just so you know, yes, there is a societal double standard between raising boys and girls. The fact that you are female means they will try and protect you more than your brothers (if you have any). Sad, but true.

>.< wtf?!?! Thats messed. More or less I can protect myself. I'm young still yes, and I do need some help and GUIDANCE but not steps on how to live my life or special treatment for my stupid gender. I never asked to be a girl and I never liked it much.
Without Royal there is a hole inside of me, I have no choice but to leave
PARADIGM_L0ST
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8/19/2010 3:00:07 AM
Posted: 6 years ago
Thats creepy. I hate when parents buy their kids underwear. It makes me feel like I don't even have privacy in the most intamite part of my body.:

Creepy? She's only 11! She has no way of buying the panties, nor the transportation to go buy them even if she did.

Not trying to keep him away from porn might help tho. Just look at INH's example of like Saudia Arabia and all the gay people.:

Oh, no, I understand fully and agree to a very large extent. I'm just trying to get you to look at it from the perspective of a parent. With any luck, your parents will remember what it's like to be 15.

They should know thats not me. ps the only porn I ever saw was one they left on in their room when they had me go in there to baby sit at 3 am.:

Well, don't be too eager to watch it. Most porn is ridiculous.

>.< wtf?!?! Thats messed. More or less I can protect myself. I'm young still yes, and I do need some help and GUIDANCE but not steps on how to live my life or special treatment for my stupid gender. I never asked to be a girl and I never liked it much.:

Yeah, it's bullsh*t.
"Have you ever considered suicide? If not, please do." -- Mouthwash (to Inferno)
Anacharsis
Posts: 139
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8/19/2010 3:51:43 PM
Posted: 6 years ago
At 8/18/2010 6:26:46 PM, lovelife wrote:
At 8/18/2010 4:26:11 PM, PARADIGM_L0ST wrote:

And just so you know, yes, there is a societal double standard between raising boys and girls. The fact that you are female means they will try and protect you more than your brothers (if you have any). Sad, but true.

>.< wtf?!?! Thats messed. More or less I can protect myself. I'm young still yes, and I do need some help and GUIDANCE but not steps on how to live my life or special treatment for my stupid gender. I never asked to be a girl and I never liked it much.

I don't have any daughters, but I can imagine I would be a lot more protective of them then of my boys. You may think you can protect yourself until you've actually had a physical conflict with a grown man. Sorry, but it's no contest unless you're 180lb body builder or martial arts expert. Women and girls are the most common targets of rape and abduction, not boys or young men. Daughters are also a lot more subject to the effects of pregnancy on their lives than the guys who may knock them up. There are good reasons for a double standard in some instances. With a desire to promote equality we try not to impose such differences too far but we're not at the point in our social evolution where we can disregard them.
InsertNameHere
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8/19/2010 4:40:12 PM
Posted: 6 years ago
At 8/19/2010 3:51:43 PM, Anacharsis wrote:

I don't have any daughters, but I can imagine I would be a lot more protective of them then of my boys. You may think you can protect yourself until you've actually had a physical conflict with a grown man. Sorry, but it's no contest unless you're 180lb body builder or martial arts expert. Women and girls are the most common targets of rape and abduction, not boys or young men. Daughters are also a lot more subject to the effects of pregnancy on their lives than the guys who may knock them up. There are good reasons for a double standard in some instances. With a desire to promote equality we try not to impose such differences too far but we're not at the point in our social evolution where we can disregard them.

That's true actually. Even I don't always feel safe going out. I'm a tiny woman, less than 5 feet tall so I'm especially vulnerable. I should just take my friend's advice and either carry a knife or learn martial arts.
lovelife
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8/19/2010 5:00:02 PM
Posted: 6 years ago
At 8/19/2010 3:00:07 AM, PARADIGM_L0ST wrote:
Thats creepy. I hate when parents buy their kids underwear. It makes me feel like I don't even have privacy in the most intamite part of my body.:

Creepy? She's only 11! She has no way of buying the panties, nor the transportation to go buy them even if she did.

I was capable of buying my own at age 11. I even did secretely but wasn't actually trusted to do so. I was trusted to spend $100 on other clothes tho. I just brought some of my own money too.


Not trying to keep him away from porn might help tho. Just look at INH's example of like Saudia Arabia and all the gay people.:

Oh, no, I understand fully and agree to a very large extent. I'm just trying to get you to look at it from the perspective of a parent. With any luck, your parents will remember what it's like to be 15.


I can see, and understand...but not fully. Itss ridiculous.

They should know thats not me. ps the only porn I ever saw was one they left on in their room when they had me go in there to baby sit at 3 am.:

Well, don't be too eager to watch it. Most porn is ridiculous.


I noticed.

>.< wtf?!?! Thats messed. More or less I can protect myself. I'm young still yes, and I do need some help and GUIDANCE but not steps on how to live my life or special treatment for my stupid gender. I never asked to be a girl and I never liked it much.:

Yeah, it's bullsh*t.

Well put.
Without Royal there is a hole inside of me, I have no choice but to leave
lovelife
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8/19/2010 5:01:59 PM
Posted: 6 years ago
At 8/19/2010 3:51:43 PM, Anacharsis wrote:
At 8/18/2010 6:26:46 PM, lovelife wrote:
At 8/18/2010 4:26:11 PM, PARADIGM_L0ST wrote:


And just so you know, yes, there is a societal double standard between raising boys and girls. The fact that you are female means they will try and protect you more than your brothers (if you have any). Sad, but true.

>.< wtf?!?! Thats messed. More or less I can protect myself. I'm young still yes, and I do need some help and GUIDANCE but not steps on how to live my life or special treatment for my stupid gender. I never asked to be a girl and I never liked it much.

I don't have any daughters, but I can imagine I would be a lot more protective of them then of my boys. You may think you can protect yourself until you've actually had a physical conflict with a grown man. Sorry, but it's no contest unless you're 180lb body builder or martial arts expert. Women and girls are the most common targets of rape and abduction, not boys or young men. Daughters are also a lot more subject to the effects of pregnancy on their lives than the guys who may knock them up. There are good reasons for a double standard in some instances. With a desire to promote equality we try not to impose such differences too far but we're not at the point in our social evolution where we can disregard them.

I was raped. I refuse to tell my parents tho because it would make my life even more miserable. From that I learned to toughen up and attack anyone that gets too close. Not cling to mommy and daddy. And yeah I was like 11-12 he was like 16.

And I will kill him one day.
Without Royal there is a hole inside of me, I have no choice but to leave
lovelife
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8/19/2010 5:03:13 PM
Posted: 6 years ago
At 8/19/2010 4:40:12 PM, InsertNameHere wrote:
At 8/19/2010 3:51:43 PM, Anacharsis wrote:

I don't have any daughters, but I can imagine I would be a lot more protective of them then of my boys. You may think you can protect yourself until you've actually had a physical conflict with a grown man. Sorry, but it's no contest unless you're 180lb body builder or martial arts expert. Women and girls are the most common targets of rape and abduction, not boys or young men. Daughters are also a lot more subject to the effects of pregnancy on their lives than the guys who may knock them up. There are good reasons for a double standard in some instances. With a desire to promote equality we try not to impose such differences too far but we're not at the point in our social evolution where we can disregard them.

That's true actually. Even I don't always feel safe going out. I'm a tiny woman, less than 5 feet tall so I'm especially vulnerable. I should just take my friend's advice and either carry a knife or learn martial arts.

I carry a knife, and going to learn taekwondo.
Without Royal there is a hole inside of me, I have no choice but to leave
Danielle
Posts: 21,330
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8/19/2010 5:05:49 PM
Posted: 6 years ago
At 8/19/2010 5:03:13 PM, lovelife wrote:
I carry a knife, and going to learn taekwondo.

We have pepper spray... I should take up martial arts again... Hmm.
President of DDO
lovelife
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8/19/2010 7:49:21 PM
Posted: 6 years ago
At 8/19/2010 5:05:49 PM, theLwerd wrote:
At 8/19/2010 5:03:13 PM, lovelife wrote:
I carry a knife, and going to learn taekwondo.

We have pepper spray... I should take up martial arts again... Hmm.

Yeah I need to get pepper spray. I didn't carry it because you aren't allowed anything to defend yourself in public school (hence I left) so now I should get some.
Without Royal there is a hole inside of me, I have no choice but to leave
RayCastle
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7/24/2013 8:55:50 AM
Posted: 3 years ago
Parents should check their children's sites they are going .watching porn is a bad thing so they are keeping a watch on you. if you have done nothing wrong let them search.