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Are rape victims who dress provocatively "asking for it"?

  • NO, but....

    I am a staunch feminist and loving father of three young daughters, and yet I think this question deserves a more complex answer than a simple YES or NO. I think (I hope) we all agree that the way a woman chooses to dress is NEVER the cause of a sexual crime committed against her (as in, she is not the instigator of that crime. The criminal is.) HOWEVER-- I live in the real world, that is full of scumbag individuals who I cannot control. Is it wrong to teach my children to NOT hang out in unsafe neighborhoods where they, as suburban, naive, children, are more likely to be mugged or murdered? Am I teaching them that THEY are at fault of they get mugged or murdered? Obviously not. I'm simply teaching them to be aware of their surroundings. In the same way, I want my daughters to be aware that they exist in a world where sexual predators exist, and that these predators often treat women aggressively who dress a certain way. Do I wish I could change that? Absolutely. Can I shield my daughters from all sexual deviants out there? No way.
    I know that many rape victims aren't dressed provocatively when they were attacked (but also that many are.) I believe that women should be free to dress how they want, regardless of someone else's potential reaction. I know men aren't these helpless sexual beasts who go crazy when a certain amount of skin is revealed. I'm only saying this: I've partied, clubbed, bar hopped, enough to see and hear first hand how certain scantily clad women are treated by bad men. There is some balance to be had. Do I think it's right that men "cat call" women and oogle their bodies when they go out at night? No. Will that change? No. Can women choose to dress more modestly as a means of avoiding those awful men, yes. Just the same as I'll never be able to stop all the murders and muggings, but I can certainly be aware of the neighborhoods I'm traveling through...

  • Asking for it

    So answer this question, we have to go to the heart of the problem - dressing. Why do you want to dress provocatively in the first place? What exactly is the reason for doing so? If you want to dress to draw attention to yourself, then be prepared to receive both good and bad attention.

    While the perpetrator is very much to be blamed for rape, I believe that the victim who dresses provocatively is equally at fault. It is one thing to say that the perpetrator could not control his desires, but it is quite another to place the entire responsibility on him. After all, it's your clothes those spark that desire in the first place.

  • Flaws of Feminism

    This debate generates a lot of feminist hate because many women believe "I should be able to wear whatever I want and have no fear of rape." First of all, no one is completely free to dress however he or she pleases. Second of all, although no one deserves rape, there are ways to prevent it. Women are strong, and do not deserve to be sexually assaulted. Strong women also have respect for themselves. Wearing provocative clothing doesn't mean they deserve to be raped, but it increases the vulnerability of women. For example, let's say I leave my iPhone in my car. The smart thing to do would be to stash it in a cubby and lock my car. However, let's say that I leave it in the front seat of the car, leave the windows down, and leave the car unlocked. And it gets stolen. Did I deserve to have my phone stolen? No. Was the theft a crime? Of course. But could I have taken precautions to prevent it? Yes.
    You see, women who dress provocatively don't deserve rape, and rape will always be a crime. But women are strong enough to defend themselves! Here's another example. Women, especially in college, are raped when they get wasted and are totally unconscious. And many liberal feminists say that "you can't blame the victim; she didn't deserve to be raped!". Well, of course she didn't deserve to be raped, but by saying that you can't "blame the victim", feminists inadvertently undermine the perceived strength of women by saying that women are too weak to defend themselves by not getting drunk to the point of unconsciousness.
    So in conclusion, no one deserves to be raped. But let me remind you, the topic of this debate isn't if women who dress provocatively deserve rape. It asks if women who dress provocatively "ask for it". Well, in a way, yes. Rape is a crime, and the women is never to blame for rape. But women are strong and powerful enough to prevent rape to an extent by choosing to have respect for themselves.

  • Nkt exactly. But it's certainly an invitation...

    I've had this debate before, a few times.

    Nkw think please. If the odds of you getting cancer are say 45%, but increases with the additiin of smoking would you smoke? Well most do regardless, it's a decision you make knowing what COULD potentially occur. YOU took the risk, you may not have 'asked' for it yet who would? Common sense says to avoid increasing your odds of getting in danger or getting harmed. So why do it anyways?

    Examples...

    Well known rich guy walks down a highl cime street with jewelry and cash. Asking to be robbed? No. Yet we can all agree its a highly stupid move and most likely wouldnt feel too bad for him.

    Drive a car with extremely dark tints and gets pulled over twice a month. Well hey thats what happens. Cops tend to associate tinted windows with illegal activity, slight risk but the point is there.

    Female stripper gets off her 2am shift at the club and decides to take a walk through the park(idk why)and well gets raped. Common sense of anyone anywhere says thats a bad move so why risk it?

    All im saying is with everything theres a possibility of increasing or decreasing risk. But when one decides to increase the risk in more than one way and something happens they are partially at fault. They should imo have to take a common sense class....

    No clothes+late night walk+high crime =One damn good chance of being raped.......

    So hows about we all just keep our clothing on when it decreases the odds of anything happening, and take it off when the odds are already well in our favor?

  • Nkt exactly. But it's certainly an invitation...

    I've had this debate before, a few times.

    Nkw think please. If the odds of you getting cancer are say 45%, but increases with the additiin of smoking would you smoke? Well most do regardless, it's a decision you make knowing what COULD potentially occur. YOU took the risk, you may not have 'asked' for it yet who would? Common sense says to avoid increasing your odds of getting in danger or getting harmed. So why do it anyways?

    Examples...

    Well known rich guy walks down a highl cime street with jewelry and cash. Asking to be robbed? No. Yet we can all agree its a highly stupid move and most likely wouldnt feel too bad for him.

    Drive a car with extremely dark tints and gets pulled over twice a month. Well hey thats what happens. Cops tend to associate tinted windows with illegal activity, slight risk but the point is there.

    Female stripper gets off her 2am shift at the club and decides to take a walk through the park(idk why)and well gets raped. Common sense of anyone anywhere says thats a bad move so why risk it?

    All im saying is with everything theres a possibility of increasing or decreasing risk. But when one decides to increase the risk in more than one way and something happens they are partially at fault. They should imo have to take a common sense class....

    No clothes+late night walk+high crime =One damn good chance of being raped.......

    So hows about we all just keep our clothing on when it decreases the odds of anything happening, and take it off when the odds are already well in our favor?

  • Like looking for someone to mug

    Let me preface by saying that I completely agree with the fact that woman do not want to be rapped, and there are many cultures in other countries (I'm talking to you India and Egypt) where women are considered the one's at fault of sexual crimes and a proper woman is not to leave he house alone, or wearing "tight" clothes. These problems are a problem of the way men are taught to view women in these cultures: as submissive to the man, as better seen than heard. And no matter how much women in these cultures try and cover up and travel in groups and stay away from "risky" areas they will be the victims of these horrendous crimes.

    On the other hand, after reading arguments from both sides I still have a problem with people who say that the woman should expect that nothing will happen to them no matter how scantily clad they dress, and no matter where they may go. To speak like this is to be naive of the way the real world works. While it is important as a culture to teach our sons to respect woman, I think woman should learn to respect themselves.

    Think of it like this, you are a wealthy person walking in a shady neighborhood. You are dress in an Armani suit, a gold Rolex on your wrist, and just as you are pulling your cash stuffed wallet out of your pocket a hooded robber holds a gun to your head and tells you to hand over the wallet and the watch. No any person will not say that person wanted to be robbed. Nor is that person is that person at fault for walking in any neighborhood or for being wealthy.

    However, and I think most would agree with me, that common street sense would say that it would be best for that person to have kept that Rolex either in pocket or hidden under sleeve. And that he should probably avoid pulling out valuable property in the open. And most people would say this because there are bad people out there, and those people are looking to do bad things regardless of who you are.

    I think the same thing applies to women. We have every right to dress as we want, and go where we want with the fear of being hurt or attacked. But we have to be wise and street smart as well. Wearing something that is very revealing, what we would call "sexy" will invite both good and bad attention. And just like that robber, that rapist is the one who is "asking for it" and will not take no for an answer. But making yourself a more visible target does not help, and is not wise.

    Of course, this does not apply to every situation, but for those who are attacked by people they don't know, who they just met at a bar/club, there are just some precautions that should be taken.

  • Yes sir e

    Girls r obv to blame they just dress like skanks and then get surprised when a man fancies them. Like if u gonna dress liek a slut u gonna get treated and USED liek a slut jesus fuck. You woman need to cover up if u dont wanna get raped

  • They deserve it as they are asking for it

    They deserve it as they are asking for itthey deserve it as they are asking for itthey deserve it as they are asking for itthey deserve it as they are asking for itthey deserve it as they are asking for itvvvthey deserve it as they are asking for itvvvvvvvvthey deserve it as they are asking for it

  • They dress provocatively, sexualizing themselves

    They are literally dressing for sexual attention or knowing that they will arouse the sexual interest of their intended target/audience. They are definitively asking for sexual attention by that person. So when the person responds to their request, how is that misunderstood? They are probably seeking sexual attention with the hope of some wining and dining first before giving up the sex they baited the audience with but how many have the patience?

  • A Young Woman and I believe scantily clad women and girls ask for it

    Some suggest that dressing should not affect others but it obviously does. Otherwise Victoria Secret and most clothing stores would go out of business. Clothing allows the wearer to communicate things. So one can easily see someone wearing revealing clothing wants to reveal things to viewers, someone wearing provocative clothing wants to provoke others but to provoke them to want? Ignoring them completely as their clothing is not meant to communicate anything..How else would they get male attention, though and feel wanted? By being interesting? That's too much work!
    However the intent then is provoking them to..Think of the wearer as sexually desirable. So..You want viewers to consider you sexually desirable but don't want them to act on it. Why do you impose such a rule in the first place, then? It's selfish to gain all you want out of a situation, communicate your sexual availability and desirability but have no intention of following through. Not everyone has self control. So why tempt every possible male for your ego and expect all of them to be passive?

    Secondly, some suggest that short clothing is better for hotter weather. Lies. I live in the Caribbean. It's pretty close to the equator. It gets very hot. "Summer all year long". I have never had a need to wear short clothes. Long sleeve pants and shirts have helped me not to burn in the sun while still enjoying the breeze. Not only that, it prevents my skin from being attacked by mosquitoes and mosquitoes often are transmitters of disease. Not only here in the Caribbean but in Egypt and other dry, hot climates the dress is long and breezy allowing for proper ventilation and modesty. It's a lot more unhealthy to wear shorts as a woman as it provides a better environment for yeast and other bacteria to flourish. All in the name of vanity and low self esteem needing boosting from random lecherous glances.


    Thirdly, I take great pride in working out and perhaps have a pride unbecoming of a young woman about how I look in my natural state. I enjoy being covered and the idea that only a special man will see me. All others who expose themselves really pale in comparison and among female peers, they ALWAYS look on in shock at how I was created. I have had girls comment "but your skin is clear and it looks great, why don't you wear shorts?" 1. Morals 2. I'm preserving that for a special someone. 3. Many rapists and murderers are free and walking in the streets right next to us. When one casts such a wide net, in trying to attract as much attention to herself as possible, these guys get pulled in as well. 4. I prefer to bore them and the average guy and look unappealing than trying to attract someone based on something as temporary as looks. In less than 10 years, those same tactics won't work as well and you become more desperate.

  • The cause of rape? Rapists.

    Please stop blaming victims for their own rape. When you do that, you are supporting the rapists out there. This is why 9 out of 10 rapists never see a day in jail, in America. Women are already very aware of potential danger. We think about it all the time. Now some think they should give huge lectures on what to do to NOT be raped. Since most rapes happen by those that we trust, clothing is irrelevant. Please educate yourselves on this subject. Always blame the rapist, the one who did the actual CRIME, and not the victim. Stop promoting old myths. Listen to rape victims. Most will tell you that what they were wearing were jeans and sweatpants. By putting the blame on the victim, you are supporting the rapist. How many have you helped today?

  • Nobody asks for it

    I don't believe that anyone truly asks to be raped, regardless of their choice in warddrobe. Just because someone is wearing a short skirt or baring a lot of skin, does not mean that someone should take advantage of them. Not to mention, most rape victims aren't dressing provocatively when they are victimized.

  • Short dresses should not equal rape

    Dressing in a certain manner does not mean that it is okay for that person to be raped by another person. I don't think anyone ever "asks" to be raped. Don't judge a book by its cover. Nobody, regardless of their choice of garments, should be raped. Not to mention, victims who don't dress provocatively are just as often victimized.

  • No, but the author of this question is :-)

    Come on now. There are only 2 types of people who could answer Yes here. 1. Those who are too stupid to know better, or at least to stupid to know how stupid answering yes would make them look. And 2, those who are merely trolls trying to see what artificial controversy they can stir up.

  • Just an excuse....

    People have the right to dress however they want, for example a women may wear a short skirt because it makes her feel confident and good about herself not because she 'wants' to be raped. This is simply a pathetic excuse, it places the blame on the victim rather than the perpetrator. The blame is only down to one person and that is the rapist.

  • It's not an invitation...

    That's not even why rapists rape. They rape women because a women appears to be vulnerable. Wearing less clothes does not make you vulnerable. Talking on a cell phone or being distracted makes you appear vulnerable. Statistically rapists will go after one who is wearing baggy pants because they're easier to take off. And also wearing less clothes does not mean you have lack of respect...

  • NO way women are asking for it

    Women are not asking to be raped because who in their right minds would ever wish that upon themselves, or even anyone else. Men need to be taught to not rape and to handle their sexual aggression with their right hand instead of raping innocent women. There's no argument there

  • NO way women are asking for it

    Women are not asking to be raped because who in their right minds would ever wish that upon themselves, or even anyone else. Men need to be taught to not rape and to handle their sexual aggression with their right hand instead of raping innocent women. There's no argument there

  • Are you f***ing kidding me?

    Of course not. People have the right to dress in a way that they see comfortable. This is not usually a crime, nor should it be. HOWEVER, rape is a crime, and it should be everywhere. A rapist is wrong to act on his/her urges. A victim is not wrong to dress as they wish. It's a little thing called freedom and human rights. A rapist invades the human rights of the victim. The victim has the freedom to dress as they wish, as it hurts no one directly (in the way rape does, which is why it is not an issue of freedom but an invasion on human rights.)

  • If they asked for it, it would be called 'sex'.

    Nobody asks for rape. If I wear tight shorts or a thin top, I want boys to notice me-not force them off of me. Rape by definition is unwilling. Besides, if I 'wanted it' or 'enjoyed it' would I even be complaining? No. They are absolutely not asking for it.


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