Im 16, and I have my won job. I occasionally will purchase my own ice cream or a Gatorade with my hard earned money, and my mom will demand I share it with my sister. I hate it, because I bought it, not her. I feel like she has no right to take my stuff and give it away.
I am a 10 year old and my parents have control over most things that I have. During school vacation and weekends they make me do even more work. The entire point of weekends and school vacations is to spend quality time with your family and do the things that you want to do yourself. NOT to spend even more time doing work.
Parents often think that because they brought their child into existence, and they raised them, they have the right to control their life and do whatever they want to. Children are human too, and they have the right to not do things against their will. Sometimes, parents physically abuse their children and call it "discipline", but most times, this discipline is caused by a parent's inability to control their emotions, and goes too far.
Controlling a child, especially a teenager, into submission breeds rebelliousness and resentment and will only come back to bite the parent once the child is out of the parents grasp. If force is needed for a child to do something the parent wants, then it is likely something that needs to not happen. Breaking the will of a child through force creates an adult who is weaker mentally and morally because they were taught to not think for themselves.
Parents are too single minded to understand that the children they gave birth to also have rights and are considered a person with equal rights. Parents that consume their child is this belief that they have the rest of their life planned out for them and when they reach 18 they have a single mindset just like the parent did. Children didn't choose to come in this world the least is to give a fair control over children to adults.
Parents can do anything, short of abuse etc, to their children. They can do anything, and can completely ignore simple rights and freedoms of both humans and first world citizens as location applies. The children have no say, and Parents and guardians can make the argument of "because i say so" no matter how good the opposing argument is. The premise of parenting is to teach their children about the world, give them simple ethics and ideas, and allow them to have a safe environment in which to grow and form opinions. They can, for example, force religion upon their children, ignoring rights to choose and can shape and completely change the child's outlook on life as well as significantly altering the child's life in general. This is just one example of the ludicrous rights and power they have over children. Parents can do anything while ignoring simple rights that adults have, and have almost complete, unfair reign over children.
I have my own opinions on this topic. I feel that all Parents should know when to use their authority, and when to negotiate and be fair. For instance, if I had a child that lied to me about something, I wouldn't ground my child or such, I would get him or her to sit down, tell them I know the truth, ask them why they lied and why they felt like it wasn't right to tell me the truth, and then reasonably discipline them (punish sounds a bit too harsh of a word).
Now crime is very different. Most likely I'd call the cops if it's bad enough, but I don't really have any examples that I don't consider bad enough to explain at the moment.
Now I also know if there are 2 parents, it's definitely unfair. Because if the Parents get really bad enough, they can call the police, tell them their child or adult child they did this and that, and since there are 2 Parents, one can be the " witness " and bam! The kid is hauled to jail most likely (my Parents called the police on me many times, but I've never been arrested, and hopefully I never do get arrested).
I'm 21 by the way, and am going to look for an Apartment in the next week after the first of the year. I currently go to College full time and work full time. I pay rent to stay at home (cash, not do chores or such, though I have asked to do chores so I can save my money).
Speaking of that last sentence in my parenthesis in the last paragraph, I feel that it should be an option whether to pay cash for rent or do chores if you're the adult child living at home. I wish that was the case regardless, but unfortunately it isn't. I also wished your parent or parents have to get a written document of agreement with such terms and go by that, and give the adult child notice to when the terms are changing and sit down and possibly talk about fair terms to agree on and document and sign and date.
I want it to where it's fair on both sides, yet there's a sense of authority and such being used. I'm the person that won't take advantage of anyone, yet want the opposition to be fair in all ways too. I realize my message can definitely be summarized, but I'm not really good with that, so I apologize for that.
My point is, use your authority, but be fair about it, but don't let your own offspring take advantage of it. I feel just because you decided to have kids or got raped (I hope it isn't the case), got pregnant, gave birth, decided to keep and raise the kid or kids yourself or with another human being, I feel it doesn't give you the right to be unruly.
Parents should not be able to control their children as they are people with human rights, too. Children should have the same rights as adults since we are all human, and in order to have total respect, we need to treat everybody equally in this country of the USA. Thanks.
Parents can often arrange things that their child does not wish to do, such as learn to play an instrument or see an old "family" friend, without the child agreeing to. The child may then rebel and say that they will not go. An argument often occurs next and the child will tell their parents to go away, leave them alone or something less respectable depending on the age of the child. The parents then may say something like "you don't tell me what to do. I tell you what to do. In situations like this the child is not given the power they deserve while the parent dictates everything. The parents will often then utilise their unjust power to take away the things that the child enjoys such as playing outside with friends or playing on their Xbox. These events then develop unhealthy relationships between parent and child which could cause the child to despise their parents for a sustained amount of time.
When parent think they are helping, they are usually being overprotective. Just stop and relax! Kids are normally rebellious, so you don't have to give reasons to. Just see what works for both of you and then you'll be fine! Life could be so much easier if we accepted this.
The fact that most of the "yes" votes are children should say something about the poll.
Sorry to say it, yes-sayers, but you are children and don't have perspective. Oh, you're 16? Sorry, still a child. "But I'm 18. I'm legally an adult!" Sure, old enough to be legally responsible for your actions and just young enough for a few more years to have no idea how to handle those responsibilities.
There was one decent yes vote. The one dated 12-30-2014. That was the only decent vote. I disagree with it, but can respect the opinion. You'll notice, yes-sayers, that as the age increases among your opinions, that the apparent level of perspective of the opinion owner widens.
"Children should have the same rights as adults since we are all human" You know what comes along with rights? Responsibilities. Why don't children have the same rights? They're not actually capable of bearing the burden of the responsibilities.
If you voted yes, are you under the age of 23? Your brain hasn't fully developed, yet. Male and under the age of 25? Yours hasn't fully developed, yet. It has no bearing on your intelligence, but your perspective is limited by lack of life experience, lack of adult experience, really lack of experience in every aspect that develops your perspective as an adult.
Understand this aspect as well: this doesn't apply to all adults, either. There are children emancipated at 15 with a clearer view of the world than 55-year old adults. However, even then, it's tenuous because of their lack of experience.
How do I know you don't have enough perspective? Fairness. You think it's unfair for a parent to tell you what to do? Really? Are you God's gift to the world? Are they undeserving of your presence? For the most part, adults choose to have children, ready for them or not. Mostly not. Regardless of how ready parents are, the financial aspect is still what it is. Let's lay fairness in this relationship down the way adults have to accept it, since you want to be adults.
Fairness to adults when it comes to relationships with the rest of the world is basically just balanced trade. We agree that if I do X for you, you will provide me with Y.
The relationship you accidentally fall into is not one you get to really be mad about, especially given how likely it is (since you're on debate.Org) that you are in a first-world country with parents who feed you. Kids don't really get to be mad about "fairness" because in all "fairness," not only do they not provide any value other than happiness. From an objective standpoint, children are one of the greatest liabilities an adult could incur.
Raising you to 10, 16, 18-years old took more time, effort, and cost to simply keep you alive- much less anything else on top of that your parents did or didn't give you- than you could reasonably ever consider pay back.
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Kids in today's society are growing up to become single minded delinquents who believe the world comes to them. Parents are allowing their children to get away things because of may reasons that society is oblivious to. By saying 'no' the parent then has to deal with their child's complaints and temper tantrums as they are frustrated, where if a parent says 'yes' there is no issues and the child learns that they can do anything as it makes their parents life much easier. Also by not being more strict on rules, teenagers and children push and push to see where their limits can take them and for it takes to get into trouble-the best part about this is that the parent doesn't give their child any trouble for the delinquent behavior. Furthermore encouraging the child to behave in such a way.
No, parents don't seem to have much control anymore. Kids can run wild, and if parents do something about it, they are "mean." We're told we are not supposed to spank kids. If they want, kids can report spanking as "beating" - then you know what happens. Anything can be interpreted as "abuse" these days.