I have two partners - one is my husband under the law and the other my husband in my heart as a second husband is illegal (which I find highly irrational). I love both my men and they love me. The relationships I have meet different needs of mine and I definitely need both in my life. It is very hard sometimes because my law husband would prefer monogamy but he works hard to be open and he benefits greatly in many ways and makes his choice freely as he does not wish for the alternative. It is a great responsibility but one I cherish deeply and feel privileged to enjoy.
Personally I believe the question is wrong. Plural marriage can benefit both sexes. There are obvious economic benefits, there's also the matter of fertility and diversity among families which benefits children. Polygamy isn't the only form of plural marriage. Also men and women cheating is far more destructive to society. I don't believe plural marriage is for everyone but it has its place. I personally don't support gay marriage. It adds nothing to society and its legalization poses far more threat to by granting benefits based on nothing more than sexual preferable. And as to the argument of "born that way" show me a gay infant.
I support it, as to the bible, the monogamous marriage was pushed by the Romans. In the old testament, the Jewish faith, polygamy was allowed to about 1950 . Jesus never mentioned it, only Paul when it states that a bishop should only have one wife, that means they should be married, thus there were polygamists. Polygamy is not a sex issue but an economic issue. It is easier for a family to exist if all help and work. They live better. Today most monogamist marriages end in divorce, so there is serial polygamy. If gays can now marry, why cannot heterosexuals cohabit or marry ? I with my three women are not legally married, only legally married to One. , but we call ourselves husband and wife, and no one has a right to tell me who o when I have any or all in my bed. It is more common than you think.
The world is changing by the minute. The American work force has changed drastically over the last thirty years. Women now receive more college degrees than men and thus have a higher earning potential. Men on the other had have begun a trend of regression by choosing not to go to college and taking less paying and successful careers. Why on Earth would an educated woman choose a lesser partner just because he's single? An expansion to my argument would be that if you were to look at statistical data you could easily see that women out number men in every age group past child hood. So logic would dictate that woman have fewer choices in a partners than men. With a smaller pool of mates to choose from this leaves women with the choice to hope there is a good single man left, try and take another woman's husband, or live in a plural marriage. I see no reason what so ever that three adults couldn't make a healthy and happy life together. As for the legal side it's only a matter of time until outdated laws get overturned. We as a society need to practice acceptance of others and be more open minded in general.
If you can't contribute an intelligent remark; please bite your lip and be quiet!
Cheating? *sigh* Jealousy much?
God meant? *sigh* Ever actually picked up the book and went throught the text? Or you have psychic abilities and can read God's mind? *sigh*
99,9%? *sigh* Making up numbers sure works in your "advantage." Leave non-Western countries out of it; they have no I-net and cannot even post here!
Unless consensual and honest and not imposed by religions NO *sigh* finally someone who gets it, but put it on the wrong side..! Sorry, but ALL relationships should be like that! A guy having sex with a woman, without any other partners or people involved, against the woman's will is still called rape, no matter how "pretty" you want to describe it!
According to some article I read at some point that I don't remember and am certainly not going to bother to source. *sigh* Very intelligent remark indeed... Actually; biologically speaking; a man only "needs" to stay with a woman for about 4 years, until the child is old enough to walk and survive "on it's own" without the help of the father, so if that's your argument, than entire society is nonsense, forcing men to behave against mother nature in this fake illusion of "needing" to stay with one woman for the rest of their life.
* Respects his woman/ women
* Treats his woman/'en as equals, even though he is the decision maker in the end
* Never uses violence
* Does not hurt anybody's feelings (on purpose, accidents always happen, in the end; we are "just" human and DO make mistakes)!
* But when he does; he WILL regret it, apologize and make it right!
There are MEN and ***holes everywhere, both in "normal" relationships, as well as in any other kind of relationship!
But people are too stupid to actually think for themselves and only look at small percentages or reason from their own pathetic narrowminded self-absorded "I'm better than all the rest" Egocentric point of view, so if you're one of those people; by all means; Bite your lip and $%^ up!
Thank you :)
Ps. Happily married, more than enough money for 10 lifetimes, everyone healthy, what more could you need? :)
I'm a shy person who loves her husband but would not mind sharing him with a woman-also a friend as long as we are all contributing. It would be nice to have a confidante and friend all the time. I find it more "normal" then homosexuality or bi or polyandry.
Full time help and companionship, being a part of a large family... Many have some down sides but no one can argue it doesn't also have great benefits. From safety to the pooling together of skills, no one could ever convince me monogamy is a happy lifestyle. Look at the number of divorces.
If your brother is dead and his wife stays alone, you can't leave her and her children. You accept her and her children if she has and after sometimes she becomes your wife. This principe worked and is working in my country. Also it is helpful if your wife can't give birth baby, for having baby you take second wife
As a man of American upbringing I can say without a doubt few men or women are equipped to care for and love and put others first. Only now at 35 after submitting my self and living with a wife who love's the all mighty more that self, can I see the beauty of each womans inner person and how to care for each being sure she is fulfilled. Now accepting a new wife, not being irresponsible and having to many children to attend We are all deeply fulfilled in a way never possible before or apart. Each wife loves the other and are happy to chat away all night long.. They are best friends! The new wife was added only with 100% agreement between everyone and only after a long exty ended courting period. Every desire is addressed and troubles are resolved collectively, but with my headship.
This life sets me free from lust and desire and guilt. I also know that I personally could not give the attention each wife and child needs if I had more wives.
I can not imagine life without every sweet soul in the home!
In this modern time this could never work without training men to live this life and without free choosing all under submission to the all mighty, and others WELL being must come first!
I have been in a relationship with one man for 10 years. I am also bisexual. My husband is Straight. It was I who presented the Idea to him and we both agreed on what was going to be OK and not. Later our mutual wife came into the picture. She could not have children but she is a wonderful mother. My husband was concerned at first but it also made our relationship stronger and we don't cheat on one another. we finally went overseas to get legally married. She is Bi and so am I and it works well for us. Imposing your own ideas on us is the only problems we face. But we all also work and our husband is not a leach. He works his butt off and we both along with the children love him. PS,. Religion had nothing to do with it, We are atheists btw.
God meant for a marriage to be between one man and one woman. Anything else is adultery. End of story. A marriage is sacred and not meant to be tainted with temptation. Sex is supposed to be with one man and one woman. Not two or three. I do not mean to bash anyone's "religion" but I cannot see justifying sleeping with 3 or 4 people and saying you are truly in love with each one the same as the others. There will be one who out stands the rest, that you cannot live without, and that is who you are meant to be married to.
Women are not meant to share a mate. They are genetically engineered to have one, and protect them. It's not only degrading, but sexist. What type of woman would want to share her man with several other women? It's like a breeding colony, where the women are nothing but incubators and items to men.
People can say all they want about how great it is for the kids having multiple moms and woman having all kinds of help around the house or how it strengthens family bonds to have such a large family but in reality lets be honest. It all comes down to sex. Ask any guy and he'll say the same thing. Its a sexual perversion that gullible woman are brainwashed to believe.
You are to be with one person and one person only. As per the bible, if you are not living in the word of God then your living your life the way YOU feel that YOU want it. If you want a reliable person to talk to besides your husband, or want some kind of companionship that you can confide in, go get yourself damn friend. One that won't be sleeping with your husband. Polygamy is not only disgusting but it wrong. Quit making up your own bible and live by the only true one out there. If your husband wants another wife, he's being a pervert.
I'm sure there are happy and healthy polygamous marriages. However if you just use logic... Such as the ratio between men and women is about 50/50, so if one man can have even just 2 wives, that means someone will go without a wife. This is unfair. Also, if my husband wants additional spouses, then he has to accept that I should be allowed to do so. If the world works this way, I think there would be a lot of chaos.
99.9% cases of a man taking other wives, is his choice, without the consentment of the wife.
Men do it not to help the wife but to satisfy his earthly sexual appetite and power and pride, as well of competing with other men.
More women resulting in more children, more mouth to feed, more space to accomodate reducing the economic wealth of the family and more conflicts than unity.
Men spend more time with some wives than others, don't know much about all his children. He fail to satisfy all the wives sexually and economically.
in so many polygamous relationships either the women hate on each other, or ignor the husband by becoming lesbians. Specially between the 1st and 2nd wives, who get less attention overtime.
when a society have options such as polyandry(one wooman many men), same sex relationship (single of mutiple), bi-sexual relationships, people can join to remain celibate, single but sexually independent (males, females and gays), then polygamyhabe it rightful place; other than that, it's just a Patriarchal (male supremesy ego which leave the community poorer with no balance, no harmony, no proper family planning, no population control; leading to no economic growth, high unemployment etc.
most polygamous countries, are the poorest on earth.
Marriage is between man and woman not man woman woman woman. I believe that you should be committed to one person not multiple because I would consider that cheating. First gay marriage was legalized now polygamy and after that what next? Legalizing teens to drink? I believe that polygamy should never be legalized.
Marriage is meant to be a beautiful and positive thing. It should be an equal partnership, rather than an imbalance. A polygamous women may give her husband 100% of herself, but only gets 50% from her husband in return.
In any loving relationship, there should be give and take. In a healthy monogamous relationship, both partners understand the others needs and do what they can to fulfill them. In a polygamous relationship, things become unfair. A woman might give all her attention and time to the husband, but only get a third or a quarter of his.
Why would you want to share your husband and kids and house? Makes no sense
Who would want to share everything and have more drama under one roof? The guy is using different females every night thats so nasty !!!! I don't get how anyone would want that !! Women are always jealous no matter what