I remember as a teen being man handled by my Father after my disrespectful rows and complaints, he dragged me into the living room so forcefully I was knocked down in the end of it. I couldn't see it then but that really woke me up and put me in my place.
Another time when I was a child my mother spanked me way too harshly for spending all my money. This is not a good example because I was not given an equal level of punishment for my wrong doing, and that simply was not a good reason for it.
I feel that too many people these days blatantly go against any kind of physical punishment to their children after hearing horror stories, they don't realize that a controlled burst of action to their child is sometimes ever so effective to their mental well being.
However this does sacrifice the relationship between the parent and the child, not in a bad way but maybe a transition from the parent being a puppy dog who gets everything for their child to a person who worked hard to provide for them and that they command respect.
Every child is different. We are all born with certain chemical combinations and variations in our brains.
My sisters never received a spanking when I was growing up, but I did(male child).
Reasons: My sisters were naturally more well behaved than I was. For the first 10 years of my life my mother was the primary. From 11 or so on my father took the reigns. It is different being a male in society. If you don't learn to keep your compulsions, emotions, and passions in check a male is more likely to wind up in prison. My father kept me from becoming a deviant.
Keeping in mind that it wasn't like my parents spanked me unabashedly every day for every little offense. It was for big things....I stole a candy bar, and received corporal punishment for that. My father additionally took me to the store, and apologize to the manager, and then made me pay for it from my own money.
Summation: Each child is different, and there is no ''handbook'' for parenting as if one size fits all. It's the hardest and most involved job on the planet. There is a difference between controlled spanking, and no holes barred beating. Just as there is a difference between murder, and killing out of necessity or self defense.
People oversimplify this issue today I'm afraid.
The fact is that some children respond to discipline in different ways. For example I never listened to anything when threatened with (and receiving) corporal punishment, while my brother did. In contrast my brother never listened to anything when threatened with (and receiving) punishment such as sitting in the naughty corner. So I know this is personal experience, but it does prove a point and I am sure its something everyone is familiar with.
People these days think that spanking kids is "wrong" and is apparently borderline abuse. My parents got spanked as kids, and they turned out just fine. I'm 14, and my mom will still pop me on the mouth if i talk back to her. Im not saying parents should beat their children or paddle them, but a nice smack on the bottom will straighten them up.
Children are such runts these days and when they need to straighten up they could use a spanking. Now I'm not saying beat them senselessly, but just a mild spanking. When it comes to groundation vs. Corporal Punishment we can see that being grounded doesn't nessisarially teach them anything while giving them a spanking and using force as a threat can get them to straighten up almost immidiately.
Why still use violence when you can achieve the same goal with words or reason it really is only the tool of a tyrant. Seriously if your only method of handling a situation is violence you should be looked up. We live in a society today that despises violence why should it then be allowed simply because its towards a child. It tends to leave a unhealthy mindset towards violence and an very unhealthy attitude towards authority (LISTEN TO ME OR IL WILL BEAT YOU) simplistic yes but this is really all violence / threat of violence boils down to.
This is like saying,"you did something that I don't like, so I'm going to cause you pain" and that is exactly the message (and the only message) that children receive from spankings. Respect and fear are NOT the same thing. Respect is something you earn by being worthy of respect, fear is something you inspire through violence and threat of pain and/or suffering. I DO NOT respect people who have to resort to violence to enforce their authority. Such people do not deserve authority in the first place and are proving how irresponsibly they abuse their power. People who cannot handle positions of power responsibly should not be allowed to have any power over others.
I also think that it is essential that we remember the purpose for punishment. If you are punishing your children simply because you get some type of satisfaction from it or out of a need for revenge (the only true reason such actions could have), then you are not a good parent, you are an @sshole. The reason we punish children is to help them learn and grow, not just to make them feel bad for defying our f*cking dominance and control over those who are smaller and defenseless against us (the very idea of "putting them in their place" proves the intention). Children do not actually learn ANYTHING useful from spankings. They don't learn why their actions might be wrong. They don't learn how their actions might affect others or how to treat others. They don't learn any of the reasons for acting any differently or why other actions might be better. They don't learn other possible actions they could have taken. They don't even learn to respect authority. All that they learn is that their parents are @ssholes that want to cause them pain, and the children are correct in feeling this way since they usually do what they do because they don't know any better or because they don't really understand (they are learning everything for the first time, you know). It is your job as a parent to educate your children, but if a man OR woman uses physical violence against any other person (whether that person be a man, woman, or child) for any reason other than self-defense, then that person is a jack@ss and doesn't deserve anyone's respect, least of all the defenseless children that are the victims of their unjustified and pointless violence.
It is your responsibility to educate your children as to how the world works. Children will almost always take the best action if they actually know what it is and why it is best. Help your children to understand why they should behave in one way instead of the other. Your primary job as a parent ( besides providing their basic needs) is as an educator. If you fail as an educator to your children, then you have failed as a parent, period.