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Parents should not force their children to learn things they dislike?

Asked by: RAXR
  • You can bring an animal to water, but you can't make it drink.

    If you force a child to do anything against his or her will, they will respond with resistance. Be it eating their vegetables, doing activities they don't like, or in the case of this debate, learning about something that they don't care for. Everyone has been a kid once, so everyone should know this from experience.

    We have all rebelled at some point in our adolescent lives against what we perceived as oppression against our free will. In these instances, we may have eventually succumbed to the force of our parent's orders, but we did not go graciously with them. Our efforts were lacking and uninspired at best.

    The fact of the matter is this, you can force a child to read about something, force them to take a class about it, and even try to force them to learn from it, but in the end you cannot force them to care about it. That has to come from the child, and only if they chose to care will they ever choose to learn.

    Sure, they can memorize a few facts about things they don't matter to them to pass their exams, but that's not learning. They'll never go further with it, and they'll just forget everything they had supposedly been taught once they're no longer forced to study it.

    If you want kids to learn, you need to make them care. They have to feel enthusiastic and truly interested in the subject before any true knowledge and wisdom can be gained. But, as I've explained, that enthusiasm will not come through force. It must be made with encouragement.

    Don't just drop a book on a child and tell them "you must read this because it's important." Well why should they care that it's important? Just because you told them so? No.

    Instead we should try to encourage the child to want to read the book on his or her own. We should explain to them why we think it's important and show them what they can gain through learning it. But in the end, we should allow them to decide whether or not it is something that they wish to pursue.

    If they do like the idea of it, then great. They'll be enthusiastically interested and truly care about spending time to learn it. If not, introduce them to a new subject and see if they get any spark for it.

    But above all, let them be the masters of their own lives. They know better than anyone else in the world about what it is they like, so let them choose the book.

  • Who's life is this?

    If it’s the kids life, it’s the kids choice. You can’t force your kid to do something they don’t like. It will only make your relationship with your child slowly crumble. If you try to take away something they love, and tell them that if they don’t do whatever it is you want them to do, they won’t get it back. This only causes the child to feel pressured. If you try to solve this with violence, such as hitting and spanking, it will only cause the child to be scared of you, not listen to you. How does hitting help? It only makes the kid scared of you, no gain, no loss, you only see your child suffer. If only my parents knew this. (I am the child, and I’m writing this). They always call me lazy, and useless. They were born in Asia, but I was born in the U.S. things don’t work the same here, I’m just as average as all the other kids. And they pressure me to shine, and to be outstanding, but do they even care about what I want? When they call me lazy, and tell me that I sleep too much, why do you think that is? Because I put all my energy and time into trying to impress them. They compare me to my cousins, and my best friends. Which is what hurts the most, is that I envy my BEST FRIENDS. Why is this the world we live in? Why can’t we all be free to do whatever we please? With no one to tell us we're not good enough, or that we are wrong.

  • It is the childrens' life, not the parents'.

    If the parents do not support or believe that their childrens' choice is any good, then they do not have to pay for the studies. In this case, it would be only but fair tjat the parents' did not pay for the siblings' studies either. It is the child's life and future at hand. Paying the child for studies that the child does not want to do will only create resentment for the behalf of the child.

  • I think so yes

    My father always force me to study and eat the things that I really dislike..What would you do when your parents are forcing you..Probably you will cry....I will listen to them because I am scared of the scoldness of my parents...But for me they are correct and also incorrect...Please don't think that your parents hates you, they love you very much...

  • Put yourself in their shoes

    Imagine going to work one day, and your boss wants you to do something that you are not comfortable with, or talk about something you dislike strongly. What would you do? I would quit. It feels like that for a kid. Some parents complain that the child doesn't have to throw a tantrum every time, but they can't 'quit'. What else can you do? If something is important for a child to learn, they can find out on their own. They are not helpless or stupid. Adults have more experience, and that is the only difference. But experience doesn't matter with something like this.

  • It is the child's life.

    I'm currently in high school and my parents want me to become a doctor or lawyer. Yes, medicine does sound intresting to me, but it is extremely competitive. They often tell me that if I don't get into medicine, I have to be a lawyer. I'm a fairly smart sudent who gets 80-90s, but aparantely it's not good enough. They often tell me that I must achieve better grades, which makes me feel dumb. Children will often be unhappy when they grow uo because of the job that their parents tell them to do. Think about this: would you rather have a job that you don't enjoy doing, but you get a lot of money, or would you rather have a job you love doing, but don't acheive as much money.

  • It is the childrens' life, not the parents'.

    If the parents do not support or believe that their childrens' choice is any good, then they do not have to pay for the studies. In this case, it would be only but fair tjat the parents' did not pay for the siblings' studies either. It is the child's life and future at hand. Paying the child for studies that the child does not want to do will only create resentment for the behalf of the child.

  • Children Should Make Their Own Choice

    If A Child Wants To Study Geography, For Example, Or Even Computer Sciences, Instead Of Business Studies, Why Should He Be Kept Away From The Geography/Computer Subject?! Why?!

    The Child Wanted To Study Tourism/Weather & Computer Sciences, But His Dream Was BROKEN DOWN By His Parents!!!

    Is That Fair?! Did They Even Consider What The Child Wants?!

    P.S. I'm The One Who Suffered!!!

  • Children Should Make Their Own Choice

    If A Child Wants To Study Geography, For Example, Or Even Computer Sciences, Instead Of Business Studies, Why Should He Be Kept Away From The Geography/Computer Subject?! Why?!

    The Child Wanted To Study Tourism/Weather & Computer Sciences, But His Dream Was BROKEN DOWN By His Parents!!!

    Is That Fair?! Did They Even Consider What The Child Wants?!

    P.S. I'm The One Who Suffered!!!

  • Parents are not always right

    Firstly some parents want their child to go to specific career. What if their child doesn’t want to go in that career? For example a parents say to his or her child you should go to in computer science but what if his or her child wants to become a teacher. Sometimes because of their parents force listen to them and go wherever their parents want them to go. Then when their child doesn’t get good marks they freak out but then it’s too late to change everything. So It is not good that parents force their child to go in specific career.

  • Parents are not always right

    Firstly some parents want their child to go to specific career. What if their child doesn’t want to go in that career? For example a parents say to his or her child you should go to in computer science but what if his or her child wants to become a teacher. Sometimes because of their parents force listen to them and go wherever their parents want them to go. Then when their child doesn’t get good marks they freak out but then it’s too late to change everything. So It is not good that parents force their child to go in specific career.

  • Primary and Secondary Education is about learning to think, not learning subjects

    There is a common misconception that they teach students subjects like English so that they can review literary Technics in later life. We all know that this doesn't really happen if your not involved in an english career but does this make english class and literary study irrelevant and pointless? Of course not. If you want to work in even a basic sales job, you need to have fluent and fluid conversational skill to sell your product. Nobody buys a product from a guy who says "yeah sure look, it's a grand old chair ya know". Also, studying books and such opens your mind to studying philosophical viewpoints and such to be a more educated person, with less bias and racism. This is just english but examples of this type of thing can be found everywhere.
    I personally never liked maths in school, bane of my life and I failed it a lot. But one thing it thought me was dealing with difficult situations by working hard to fit the pieces together. If i had been given the choice to leave it forever, I would have and now, I'd have absolutely not problem solving or reasoning in my head, or at least not the the level you get with education
    So the students will just have to take the information and pass the exams and deal with it cuz after all, its only for a few years and they gain a lot from something they'll never directly use again.

  • Not Everything in Life is Fair

    Whether we like it or not, life will throw hurdles and make us use our thinking/strategy skills to the fullest. Adolescents will be going through a process of self-discovery and hormonal imbalances. This WILL include sexual curiosity and the need for "the talk". Discussing important topics like that will help children to prepare themselves for the realities of the real world as they get older.


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