The Republican Party is not supportive of gay rights and gay marriage, so if by treating gay republicans different than democrats you mean telling them they are not republicans then yes, they should be treated differently. Being supportive of one political party or another is not very difficult, but agreement with the party platform is generally a must. There are many strains of conservatism, and their inter party arguments do help to attract many to their cause, and adapt over time, but if I understand the original posters real question of should/would/will Republicans accept gays is that they will not. To do so would anger their much larger base that is against gays and gay rights. The potential slight increase in support by new gay republicans is not worth the political loss of support by many who already accuse some of being RINOs (Republican In Name Only). As a young republican myself, and someone not against you or gays personally, I can say that you are not a republican, and will not be until your inclusion is worth the political damage the party would take. Republican leadership is already losing ground among young people, they do not need to offend their older base. One day they may accept gays, but I doubt it, the party will not survive if it continually moves toward the center, not to say that they should move any more right, but becoming what may now be a "moderate" party will only hoist the democrats even higher above us politically than they already are, when it comes to members and votes, as far right individuals wont vote for them any more.
There are far more pressing concerns in a nation of over 300 million people with regard to a broken education system, energy policy, monetary policy, the economy, taxation, regulation, the bloated welfare state, and so forth. To me, this doesn't require a point by point rebuttal. The idea that people people define themselves by their sexual fetishes, what they do in their bedrooms, is bizarre. To further have this 2-3% of the population demanding a special enclave within the two major parties is an absurdity. I will have to agree with Mr. Robert Bork when he suggested we're 'Slouching Toward Gomorrah'