Amazon.com Widgets

Should parents of unruly kids be blamed for the kids' bad behavior?

  • In summation, yes. It is the parents inability to punish a child that causes their behaviour to become 'unruly'.

    To a certain age, most commonly the age in which a child legally becomes an adult and therefore develops a psychological reasoning they can look after themselves, children will often do as their parents ask. From an early age it is the parents responsibility to operate in a way that would teach the child whether its actions are accepted and praised or unacceptable and are punished. An easy example to support this is the ever growing rebellious nature of children these days; being only 16 years of age myself, and having witnessed such occasions; parents refrain from actually punishing their children. Most often I see young children between the ages of 3 - 7, screaming and being irritating in general, as opposed to dealing with the child, the majority of parents would simply ignore them, causing the incessant irritation to continue until the child was finally removed from my presence and I could continue my previous activity while retaining my concentration and sanity.
    Then, considering children of an older age than that, and sometimes surpassing my own; it is most common to witness the child refusing to do as they parent asks. My younger sister as the best example, she is now 10 years of age and is being brought up by my mother, a rather unsatisfactory parent. When I visit my mother's house I am constantly confronted by my younger sister refusing to do as my mother would ask, and while most would argue its simply due to her age, where she is beginning to think for herself and will question why she has to do things such as keep her room tidy, however; this is not the case. It is because my mother does not punish her. She will reward my sister for doing things, as opposed to punishing her for not doing them. It is not enough to simply give them a reason to do something, but rather give them a reason to avoid not doing it. My father, were I or my brother to refuse to do as I was told, or did something unacceptable; would immediately smack us, and I do not regret it. It taught us, and to this day I (though not my brother necessarily now at the age of 18), will do exactly as my father asks (within reason) without complaint. To support this I offer my own evidence of dealings with my sister, while never would I smack my own sister, I do punish her. If ever she were to not do as either my mother asks, or I if I am babysitting (such as tidy her room), I will confiscate an item every 10 minutes she has not done as she is asked, ranging from a toy to her very duvet and pillows so she has to sleep in the cold. It is not a horrible thing to do, as the cane in schools was not; it is simply a method of teaching and getting the desired results.

  • Kids Are Their Parents' Responsibility

    Children who by definition are not responsible for themselves must be considered the responsibility of their own parents. The parents of unruly or disruptive kids, whose behavior upsets civil society, must be held accountable by society and should share the burden of having awful children that the rest of society has to deal with because without consequences the awfulness will be tacitly encouraged.

  • In many cases, yes.

    Many parents do not teach their kids proper manners and are not stern enough with them when they need to be. You do not have to smack or strike a child to make them respect and pay attention to you. You can teach them the proper way to live through nurtering and stern explanation when it's needed.

  • It Depends On The Age

    For young children, bad behavior should be blamed on the parents. If your kid is screaming in the store at age 3, that's a good sign you need to leave and punish the child for their behavior. If you insist on not doing this, it is purely out of your own laziness to perform your duties as a parent. Yes, it's terribly inconvenient to do this, however letting children control the situation only sets you up for failure later on down the road. At some point parents do lose the ability to control unruly behavior, generally in the teen years. When this the case, I think parents may have caused the problem, but they no longer have the control to fix and therefore shouldn't be blamed directly.

  • Children are their Own People

    While parenting clearly plays a significant role in the upbringing and demeanor of a child, it is important to remember that ultimately, the child is his or her own person, and not a pet of his or her parents. It is expecting too much of parents to insist that their children never misbehave at the risk of facing punishment themselves as parents.


Leave a comment...
(Maximum 900 words)
No comments yet.