Aren't we the UNITED States? I never really understood the 'states rights' thing. We're UNITED for a reason - human rights law and policy should apply to everyone who lives in the union - not just in states that happen to have legislatures that agree. As an aside, a human right should NEVER be a referendum on a ballot, either. Where would we be if past civil rights legislation was voted on by the public? The 'majority' is not always morally or ethically right.
The state should never be able to govern the rights of individuals. This country is supposed to be free. If two people love each other there is no reason that they should not be allowed to marry. When we start taking rights away from someone to be able to marry the one they love we are overstepping our boundaries.
States will argue it's their right to see marriage how they want, but at a certain point your right to live in a previous century has to go away. People want this, more than those that do not. It's time to start acknowledging all people as, well, people. This is a fight that won't conclude soon.
If a couple is receiving federal benefits from being legally married, then yes, regardless of which state they are in, they should be able to apply (get married) for those benefits. Otherwise, it would be considered a form of discrimination that depending on geo-location, you would be qualified to receive those benefits.
There is so much controversy about who can be married and where they are allowed to do so. I think it is just ridiculous. Everyone should be able to be married if they want to, and they should not have t cross state lines to do so. Who are you or I to tell someone they cannot get married? It is just ridiculous.