They didn't necessarily take care of us. There are plenty of parents who abandon or abuse their children. No one should be forced to be around physically abusive people regardless of their relationship. Furthermore, some parents can be mentally abusive or disown their children for having different beliefs. Whatever the cause of a family split, no one should be forced to be around someone they don't want to be around. Choosing a friend and then abandoning them is a different story (though I wouldn't claim you should be forced to support a friend either) because you get to choose your friends. You don't get to choose your family.
Generally, it's what people do, and it makes sense why, but I am for people being able to make their own individual decisions based on their specific experiences regardless of what others think about them.
Everyone reading this has/had parents who devoted their life to us. They did everything and anything for us. They taught us valuable lessons that we couldn't learn anywhere else. Parents are/were our whole entire world. Why wouldn't we take care of them. It's 100% disrespectful and rude to say 'no' to this question. So my answer is yes.
I brought you into the f***ing world, and I can take you f***ing out of it (warning: I may have paraphrased a bit). Hey, man, but listen, your parents are the reason you're alive. You gotta give them a little credit for that. Not that "getting it on" (trying not to get my post censored, because if I say f*** no one bats an eye but I say sex and everyone loses their minds) is hard or something, but do you know how hard it hurts to give birth to a baby? Do not complain about pain till you been in that game. Don't tell me you don't owe your parents a little bit at least.
Parents provide for the care of their children. After years of hard work they will be getting older so their adult children should take care of their elderly parents as necessary. Caring for the needs of your family members is the minimum behavior that can do to honor their parents. This should be a reciprocal relationship of love. It is a legally and morally obligation for a well-raised person.
As an example , when we are borned the first face to see is mother and then our father . And they are the one who we see at the end of our life too . Besides that , they have came trough many kinds of people and problems to take care of us .
Our parents raised us for a long time. We may argue with our parents every now and then and we may say, " i hate you." But hate is a strong word. Your parents will always love you. No matter what their condition is we should return the favor and take care of them as if they were taking care of us. No matter what condition we are in, our parents are the ones to look after us. So why not just return the favor and take care of our parents.
I think a parent's main responsibility is to raise their children to be functioning adults. I hear many parents happily say "I'm going to kick my kid out as soon as they turn 18." So you're going to throw your kid out on the street with no career training, no education, just a high school diploma if they are lucky, into a questionable job market, with no experience, little driving experience, no sex education, no savings, nothing? And then you expect these kids to come back and care for you when you are vulnerable and frail?
My dad threw me out at 17. Then he acts like I am responsible for abandoning him. I haven't spoke to him since. I've accepted that he abandoned me and have moved on. I've explained to distant family members that I'm not a puppet to be manipulated at will. I'm not there for people who are not there for me.
At 17, I started working three jobs to support myself. I couldn't afford to go to college right away. I worked dead end job after dead end job. Unfortunately, in my late teens and twenties I let guys walk all over me and use me and I had a number of bad relationships simply because i didn't know any differently. I was never taught that I had value or was capable of love or being loved in return. I had no family to rely on, guide me, or look out for my best interests.
But I overcame it. I taught myself how to set boundaries in relationships, how to not get involved with toxic people, how to not need other people, how to save money, how to budget, how to build credit, open a checking account, how to overcome obstacles and failure.
I've gone to college for a number of different things. Explored a lot of careers. Have finally chose Computer Science and am slowly working on it.
I don't dump my problems on other people, but I know that if I did people would tell me "You're an adult and responsible for your own life."
That's what people tell their 18 year olds. "You're an adult and responsible for your own life." And then they are shocked when their 50 year old child doesn't take care of them when they're old and spends little time with them. That child is simply saying "You're an adult now and responsible for yourself."
Children are products of their environments. I have not loyalty to my father, as I was never shown any loyalty by him.
My parents are divorced. My father has taken the time to ensure that his life plan includes financing for long term care should he need assistance during his elder years. I can respect him for that and I appreciate that he was responsible enough for himself to make a plan for something like that. My mother, retired early, made several terrible financial decision despite advice from myself and others and now expects for me to take care of her in my own home. I think is ridiculous that I am expected to care for her after her many poor life decisions. My parents may have cared for me over the years, but my independence grew during their care for me and eventually I became fully independent and am now a successful adult. Care for an elder parent only becomes more and more burdening as time goes by. Everyone knows they are going to grow old and eventually need assistance, they should plan on that. Being in my late twenties I already have a plan in place for retirement funds that should be enough to cover ALL of my expenses UNTIL I die. This includes the cost of assisted living, because I KNOW I will need it and dont want to burden anyone else with taking care of me.. Except for me.
Everyone knows they will get old and need care. Why should that be someone else's responsible. They should take out insurance for themselves. To have children and expect them to take care of you when you get old is a little selfish. I didn't ask to be born. They gave me life to make my own decisions.
You spend 16-18 years with two people and people automatically think that's reason enough to care for them, nope. As people age they change they are not the same people, we take care of children because they can't take care of themselves, older people should make arrangements or bow out gracefully anyway they can.
My 88-year-old widowed father and I share a house, and I do most of the housework, cooking, maintenance, shopping, etc. -- if I wasn't here, he would have to had to sell up and move into a nursing home after Mom died three years ago. I don't at all mind keeping house for Dad, running errands, etc. However, I also work full time, and because I'm single and earn a relatively low income, I cannot afford to quit to look after Dad if and when he becomes incapacitated and unable to care for himself anymore. We also can't afford home care, so I don't know what's going to happen in the future. I can't be in two places at once, and there is no one else to help out. I have a sister, but she has made it fairly clear that she doesn't want to be Dad's "baby sitter" so all this is on my shoulders. It's very worrying and stressful when you know you are not going to be able to cope with the situation when the person becomes immobile, confused, incontinent, etc. Dad and I ran into that with Mom during her final illness -- she lost her mobility, kept falling, and we couldn't get her up off the floor without calling an ambulance. She ended up dying in hospital while waiting for a bed in a local care home. We had no other solution but to send her someplace where there were people who could at least lift her. People argue that our parents cared for us when we were little, so we owe them -- BUT it's a lot easier to look after a sick child than a sick adult. There's a big difference there. Children are mobile and lightweight -- elderly parents are not. That's a huge physical barrier.
If one wants to take care of his parents that is fine, of course.
But one shouldn't be forced to do so if he does not want to do it.
If someone had really bad parents, why would he take care of them?
If one can't afford it, why would you want to force him to do it?
To all these people saying we owe our parents to take care of them I can only say, that I was never asked to be born. I never signed any contract that said that I have to "repay" my parents for raising me.
Parents usually have their own, selfish reasons to have a child and they are responsible for the work and trouble they had raising it.
If somebody refuses to take care of his parents, he will have some reasons for it.
And he should have the freedom to choose.