Life has so much magic and wonderful things to experience, warm memories to be created - why would we lie to our children to create something that's not real and simply not necessary? I hate the idea of lying to my kids. I look at their questions and my day to day choices with them such as following through with the simplest of promises as a way to prove to them they can trust me. Period. The truth matters, in all circumstances. How could I lie to my children, even if it carries good intent, and then expect them to be truthful in every area with me?
Children learn by what we DO. Saying nice things to people rather than harsh, ugly words is called kindness. But telling lies to manipulate children or others is wrong. It teaches that my selfish desires justify being deceitful to others, to get what I want. It also creates irrational fears in children that may last a lifetime, preventing them from reaching their full potential, emotionally as well as intellectually. So why lie to your child about stupid stuff like the Easter bunny? Just explain it is a silly story that some people like to pretend and play games about. I raised 3 children this way, who are now in their 30's and incredibly successful in their relationships and careers. Honesty is the basis for all relationships and good character traits. It is not optional to being a good human being.
These figures are such a huge part of every childhood. Many kids are devastated when they discover that they do not exist. As parents, we want honesty from our children, and we try to teach them to always tell the truth. Why should they be expected to do that when we lied to them for so long about something that was such a huge part of their growing up? It's a huge betrayal, in my opinion.
More beauty in this world than the Easter Bunny, Santa, God & The Tooth fairy. We don't need to make up fiction, when there is already so many beautiful things in this world.
Lying to children then telling them not to lie is reprehensible. It makes as much sense as smacking a child for being violent.
Telling your children about Santa Claus is not unethical. It is part of the magic of the holidays. No harm is done in a child believing that Santa Claus will give them presents if they are good. With children, sometimes they need a little more incentive to behave, and Santa Claus provides that. There are also families that aren't religious, so their children still get to celebrate in the holidays without the religious aspect.
Parents should tell their kids the truth about fictional characters, such as Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny. If they do not tell their children that these characters do not exist, their children can face quite a bit of humiliation in school and around friends. It is okay to let a child believe these things for the first few years of their life, but as soon as they start to interact with other kids, they should be told the truth.
Angels on high, a pregnant virgin, God in a manger, a guiding star… are impossibilities. Yet, “all things are possible with God.” [Yes, you need to believe in the virgin birth to be a Christian] We ask our children to trust us on these claims with their lives. Then we add a fictitious, omniscient fat guy with a red-nosed reindeer to the mix. At a certain age we matter-of-factly disclose that we were just kidding about the chimney intrusion, the Elven workshop, and the works-based naughty-or-nice judgment. “Those parts are make-believe, the rest is gospel truth. Trust me, son.”…… I never want my children to have this existential monologue in junior high: “Daddy told me about a six day creation, virgin birth, Easter Bunny, Santa Claus, angels, and fairies. Then he said he was only joking about half the stuff. I felt gullible for falling for it. Mmm. I wonder if my science teacher is right about Evolution? What other nonsense has been fed to me as fact?” I want my children to grow up knowing that their dad never, ever lies to them. About anything. This may lead to some awkward moments in life, like a premature discussion about where babies come from. But surely adding a stork to the catalogue of misinformation can’t be a better tactic than opting for truth in every situation.
Deceiving your child at such a young age sabotages the foundation of trust between the parent and the child. When a child finds out from his/her peers about the lie, they start wondering what else their parents have lied about. What is real? What happens when your child stays up the entire night waiting for the fictitious man that never shows up? Once that 'magic' is broken, the child becomes desensitized to other possibilities, to the real meaning of giving. The entire premise of behave and be rewarded or you won't receive any gifts is nothing short of blackmail and behavior conditioning. The truth is most parents do it because it was done to them, they want their child to relive the moments and experiences they felt. In many aspects, the entire deception is built solely for the parents happiness and not necessarily for the child. You can still celebrate Christmas, enjoy the holidays and partake in gifting without lying to your child. If you feel that you must lie to your child about a fictional character in order to satisfy your quench for happiness and fulfillment, perhaps you should think about your own childhood. You want to teach your children about values, ethics and giving? Do real meaningful activities, volunteer at a soup kitchen with your child, purchase small gifts or do crafts together to gift at a local orphanage, show to your child the real meaning of gifting. If you need Santa Clause to produce these magical memories, then it just shows that you lack creativity and imagination which apparently was not inherited by your own experiences of celebrating fictional characters. I find it alarming that such a large percentage think it is okay to do this, it explains why newer generations have such little respect toward their parents. Deception does not encourage imagination, it encourages distrust.
Just because everyone else is doing it doesn't make it right......
Observance of customs and laws can very easily be a cloak for a lie so subtle that our fellow human beings are unable to detect it. It may help us to escape all criticism, we may even be able to deceive ourselves in the belief of our obvious righteousness. But deep down, below the surface of the average man's conscience, he hears a voice whispering, "There is something not right," no matter how much his rightness is supported by public opinion or by the moral code.
-Carl G. Jung
Parents should not lie to their children; it sets a bad example for them. How can they instruct their kids not to lie when they deceive their kids themselves all for the sake of a little fun? Children have active imaginations and can dream up make believe scenarios, but parents need to be truthful, so children know they can be trusted.
Just a fun game? Lets allow Jesus to answer that question for us:
"And all manner of all liars shall not enter the Kingdom of God" Rev 21:8
"And all who love and maketh a lie shall not dwell in the Holy City of New Jerusalem of Heaven (Rev: 22:14)
Christan is not, you should still strive to be perfect - Which lying about Santa is not. Lying to your children is a work of Satan and will keep out of heaven unless you repent and practice truth.
In the gospel, JESUS called Satan "The father of all lies". So it no surprise that Satan is the author of the Santa Claus lie. (Satan being an anagram for Santa.)
You are living a delusion if you lie about Santa and think it is acceptable to lie. How can anyone say something like that? They know it is wrong.
So will churches lift up Jesus and remove the lie of Santa??? Don't bet on it!! £££ They can't do this because many people will be enraged taking their donations and replacing him with a Satan loving pastor. Here is Jesus's message. "It is better to tie your neck around a stone and jump into the sea than lead one of these little ones astray."
Ask the majority of adults if they would change their holiday memories of Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny, or the Tooth Fairy, and I am sure they would say "no". That is why these so-called lies prevail: because, ultimately, they only create overwhelmingly positive childhood memories.
Santa Claus is based on Saint Nicholas who gave all his wealth to the poor and sick. He helped people and his piety inspired stories for cultures all over the world. He is known in many different names and under many other pretences but the main reason for Santa Claus is just to spread the spirit of Christmas. As I kid growing up I had such fun on Christmas Eve with all my cousins looking for clues that Santa was at my house and watching out for him and his infamous reindeer. It was the joy of being with my extended family and eating great food that got me excited for Christmas, not the presents that Santa would bring. I was not mad at my parents for lying to me about Santa. It came gradually to me as I got older and started to listen to the facts. It's the spirit of Christmas that matters, not the fact that Santa doesn't exist. And much to the dismay of others, Santa is now a part of the spirit of Christmas.
The perception of the world around us, is a mix of facts and fiction. In the upbringing of children, we tell stories or events about many things, in fact even the concept of God and religion also does not have any proof, even God could be considered fictional. So, I believe there is no harm in responsible introduction of fictional characters such as Santa Clause, the Easter Bunny and the Tooth Fairy.
These stories are just that - lovely stories told to children with fictional characters that have become 'larger than life' and part of our cultural fabric. I don't know many parents who present these stories as hard fact, and even their 'deceptions' (dime - or dollar - under the pillow) are pretty transparent.
Fictional characters like Santa Claus and the Tooth Fairy provide a valuable asset in teaching children good behavior. Telling children that Santa Claus rewards good children provides a means of guiding conduct that parents wish to reinforce. The Tooth Fairy provides a means of teaching about dental care. These can be of valuable assistance in teaching children and encouraging good behavior. As such, they are completely ethical in and of themselves, and provide a valuable social function.
Imaginative children typically do better in school, and not just in art and writing classes. Children who have been raised with a belief in fantasy characters, such as Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny, and the Tooth Fairy will have a stronger conception of magical phenomenon, which are obviously imagined concepts. They therefore will be better able to utilize their imagination, which is an early precursor to creative problem solving ability. By lying to their children about fantasy characters, parents are actually helping their children develop important skills.
Children enjoy the imaginary world of fairy tales, movies and legends, like the Easter Bunny, Santa Claus and the Tooth Fairy. There is no evidence that such fantasy characters have an ill effect on children. Some parents choose to not participate in these traditions, just as some parents do not raise their kids in a particular religion. But, it is not unethical to do so. It is simply a parenting choice, without danger to the child on either side of the question.
I don't believe for one minute that it's unethical to lie about something that has been told to young children for many, many years. Children all over the world have enjoyed many Christmas Eve's putting food and a drink out for Rudolph and Santa and also putting a tooth under their pillow for the tooth fairy to bring them some money. To them, it's a little game.
However, for the parent, it's also a little bit of interaction and quality time with their child that people sometimes don't get enough of.
Every child grows up with the idea of some fictional character like Santa Clause or the Easter Bunny. This is not detrimental to their psyche, since once they grow up, they realize on their own that these characters are fake. There is no reason why it should be considered unethical since it does no damage to children. A thing that does damage children is parents teaching them about another fictional character: god. And that children cannot realize on their own that it is false because their parents never acknowledge that fact either.
We tell our children all sorts of fairy tales when they are young. When they get old enough to sort out fact and fiction (around age seven), they realize that there is no such thing as Santa, along with Cinderella and Pinocchio. At this point, we should respect their reasoning ability, and let them in on the secret when they ask about Santa.
When a parent tells their child that Santa brings them presents at Christmastime it is a great opportunity for the parent to be generous to their child without recognition. This is an incredibly Christ-centered teaching that says not to let your right hand know what your left hand is doing. While lying is generally unethical, it is because it carries bad intentions and desires to bring about negative consequences, whereas these 'lies' are simply an opportunity to do good without being honored for it.
Some of my favorite memories of childhood are directly related to those fictional characters. Part of being a child is the belief in "real" magic, the possibility of the impossible. These fictional characters are simply a part of that magic. It's also these fictional characters and other stories of magic that teach a child to think "outside of box." It helps to develop their ability to solve problems that seem impossible. Denying a child these stories would lead them into an adulthood without hope, filled with impossible obstacles.
There is nothing more exciting than seeing your child's excitement Christmas morning. Every year for a few moments I start to believe again (even though I was up the night before putting toys together and arranging presents under the tree). Kids will have the rest of their lives to grow into cynical grumpy adults. Just for a few holidays a year let us all have a little magic.
I think childhood fairy tales are an important part of childhood. They create such excitement in a child as well as stimulate the imagination. Many psychologists feel it is healthy, and the child will choose when to stop believing.