Unfortunately, I've already broken up. One of the reasons why, was because of my mom. Yay. :( I found it incredibly hard once I broke up with him. I felt like my mom didn't understand. And it didn't help when she would drink and say things about him. I suppose now I learned to deal with it. I don't like it though.
Love can be great and beautiful, but it can also be blind and foolish. I will sincerely trust my mother's opinion as she obviously has much better experience within these matters.
It is always good to hear advice, especially that of a parent who knows you very well. Additionally, they could be bad traits that this girl/guy you love is letting off, that could lead to consequences in the future. You however will not be able to perceive them as "love" has masked your perception.
Blatantly stating "its my life" is a statement filled with folly. "I can do anything I want" you say, but remember not everything is beneficial...
I trust my mother's judgment, and would trust her if she felt a person I was involved with was not right for me. There have been times, in the past, where I have stuck with a person, even when she disapproved. And, in the end, she was always right. She knows me better than anyone. I will not make the mistake of not listening to her again.
I would dump the girl I love if my mother didn't approve of her. My mother is a Christian and a good judge of character. I am confident that if my mother, who supports me completely, told me she didn't like a girl I was dating, then it would be in my best interest to stay away from that girl. Most likely, there is something about this girl that I didn't catch in the first place that is wrong. I would trust my mother's judgment.
My mother actually works in the same work area as this girl that I'm currently dating. Yes my mother has a perspective of the girl that I don't have. But her reasons for her not wanting me to date this person aren't adding up. I've talk to this person daily and I get to know them better with each conversation. I'm happy with the person I'm dating. They were honest and straight up with me from day one! Its my life I'd rather say "Oh well" than "what if" in this circumstance. I'll just have to let it play out and see what happens.
If your mom loved you that much (not saying she doesn't love you but . . .) she would learn to accept the person you are with and then she will realize that they aren't a bad person! She will learn to love them and accept them as part of the family. If your partner is that important to you, then you shouldn't let anyone stop you from loving the person who you love most!
My boyfriend's mother isn't nice to me simply b/c she is just worried I'm taking her baby away. She never gave it a chance to get to know me. She wouldn't even look at me. It's a racist thing. But my boyfriend and I are going to see our relationship through no matter what.
Seriously, it's your damn life. Why should you care what your parents, grandparents, siblings, uncles, aunts, whatever, think of your girlfriend? Most people are aware society is filled with idiots. What most people are not really ready to accept is that amongst their family there might exist a bunch of those. I wouldn't dump my girlfriend if my mother didn't like her at all. It isn't her call. It's mine. She's had her life, her choices and her consequences and yes, you might argue "Well, my mother has a lot of experience and she's just trying to show me what's better for me", but whatever works for her doesn't necessarily apply to you. You're different people. And even if my mother was right and I was wrong, if this girl wasn't right for me, I'd still prefer to be mistaken with a decision of mine than be uncertain because of someone else's decision. Ditto.
I actually have this going on right now. The mother of the guy I love doesn't like me, but yet she also doesn't really know me. I have only met her maybe 2 or 3 times. He broke up with me, and didn't talk to me for the longest time. Yet, if any guy ever tries to get interested in me he is the first to try to talk to me! He wants me in his life, but feels as though I don't belong. :-/ Crazy I know! Bottom line: If my mother didn't like him (and she doesn't because of the way he has treated me) then it still wouldn't affect my decision to try to be with him. However, he did say his mother would probably run him off if he ever saw me. I think that is ridiculous. No one can stop you from seeing someone if you truly love them. In the end I would fight to do whatever it took if I had to. All because of one simple fact: At the end of my life I am the only person who has to live with my decisions and whatever regrets I may have. I would regret more not fighting to be with the person I love then to regret letting someone else ruin it for me.
This is a hard question to answer since each situation is different. But I lean towards no because it's true, this is MY life. I don't want to have any regrets when my time is done so I refuse to let anyone or anything stand in the way of my happiness. I agree that as your parents, your mother or father would only have the best intentions for you. By saying that they don't want you dating someone they most likely only have the best intentions. Like hoping to protect you from something negative having to do with your partner. But just because they have pure motives that does not make them right. They may dislike your choice of a partner for a number of reasons. What you should do is find out what those reasons are. Sit down with your parents and find out what the true reasons are for their discontent with your partner. Tell them how you feel about him or her and listen to what they have to say as well. Some parents may have superficial or other inappropriate reasons to dislike them. If this is the case and you truly cannot change their mind, forget them. I don't mean never speak to them again or anything rash like that, what I mean is it's your life and if you full heartedly love this person, then you'll stick with them no matter what. And if your parents love you they will come to accept this person because what good, loving, true parents really want at the end of the day is for their child to be happy.
If you have a girlfriend who makes you happy and who you love to spend time with it shouldn't matter what others think. Hold onto the people that make YOU happy and feel loved no matter how much others disagree with it. If your Mother doesn't like your girlfriend ask her why and get them to talk it out to see if they can sort things out.
Because of my personal relationship with my mother, I have grown to value her opinion more than anyone else's, and I will think about her -reasons- for not liking the love of my choosing, but she is incapable of dictating who I love. The way I see it, she doesn't have to love him, sleep with him, or be around him, and as long as I am happy, why the hell would it matter to her? She should trust me to make proper decisions myself
Love has no boundaries. Any outside influences between a couple are always present but true love should generally prevail.
Your parents do have your best interests at heart but they don't own your heart and completely understand it or love with it.
You were born into this world as an individual unique person, granted the privilege of choice and those liberties we all often forget (or take advantage of). Being that unique person we should not judge our partners based on external influences that attempt to flaw your partner because the truth is we all have flaws. If we learn to accept one another in perfect love this question is easily solved.
Your parents could be right, they could sense something going or about to go wrong...whatever the outcome it does not matter because the unpredictability of life Is beautiful which makes it more interesting and rewarding.
Sorry mum whatever you say, I hear you, but you are not me, I am me. The choices I have made they were never yours to begin with. I planted a seed, it grew to a tree, so leave it alone--it won't need your pruning :)
If I ever let my mother have influence over who I dated and loved, I'd be surrendering my power to be happy to another individual. All that accomplishes is never being happy, because you are then only there to feed the happiness of that person. My mother sees me as a son, and she could never know who is a good romantic match for me.
People tend to worry too much about what others think. If you love someone, there is no violence involved, and they treat you well, then it doesn't matter if your parents don't like them. You may not like one of your parents, but the other parent still stays with them.
As an adult, whether or not my parents approve of my significant other is of little concern to me. If I was living with my parents, this would be more difficult, as it could raise discontent at home. It's a lot easier to stand up for yourself when you are an independent person. I would take my parents' concerns into consideration, but ultimately it's my decision, not my mother's, who I date.