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The Instigator
sweatycreases
Pro (for)
sweatycreases
Losing
57 Points
The Contender
beem0r
Con (against)
beem0r
Winning
87 Points

I CAN HOLD A WHOLE CHICKEN WITH MY BUTT

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Voting Style: Open Point System: 7 Point
Started: 2/19/2008 Category: Society
Updated: 14 years ago Status: Voting Period
Viewed: 5,730 times Debate No: 2782
Debate Rounds (3)
Comments (20)
Votes (39)

 

sweatycreases

Pro

I CAN HOLD A WHOLE CHICKEN WITH MY BUTT. ITS BEST IF YOU HOLD ON TO ONE OF THE LEGS BUT PEOPLE WHO ARE REALLY GOOD AT IT CAN HOLD IT BY JUST 1 WING. TURKEYS DUCKS AND GOOSES ARE HARDER TO HOLD BECAUSE THEY WEIGH MORE.
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beem0r

Con

You make a remarkable claim, and for this I and the viewers will require a remarkable amount of evidence. Simply claiming that you can does not make it so.
I can fly. See, I still can't. If you can in fact hold a whole chicken with your butt, you will need to do more than simply say it to prove your point.
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 Debate Round No. 1
sweatycreases

Pro

HOW REMARKABLE IS IT REALLY TO MAKE SUCH A CLAIM? IF A PERSON WERE TO TAKE A WHOLE DEAD CHICKEN RELATIVELY SMALL IN SIZE, AND POSITION ANY PART OF IT SO THAT IT COULD BE PINCHED BETWEEN EACH CHEEK, IT COULD BE ACCOMPLISHED WITH A MINIMAL DEGREE OF DIFFICULTY. I COULD PIN THE CHICKEN BETWEEN MY BUTT AND AN UNMOVING OBJECT, SUCH AS A WALL, VEHICLE, ETC, AND HOLD IT AGAINST THAT OBJECT. ALSO, IT COULD BE POSITIONED ON TOP OF MY BUTT SO THAT THE MAJORITY OF THE WEIGHT OF THE CHICKEN WAS RESTED ABOVE WHERE IT WAS PINCHED BETWEEN THE CHEEKS.

YOU COMPARE MY STATEMENT TO THE CLAIM THAT SIMPLY STATING THAT YOU CAN FLY DOESN'T MEAN THAT YOU CAN, BUT WHAT I'M CLAIMING IS NOT ONLY PHYSICALLY POSSIBLE, BUT IS RELATIVELY EASY TO DO. OBVIOUSLY, I CANT SIMPLY CRAM A CHICKEN IN MY BUM AND SEND YOU A PICTURE OF IT, BUT IF YOU HAVE A MINIMAL UNDERSTANDING OF FUNDAMENTAL PHYSICS YOU CAN FIGURE OUT THAT HOLDING A WHOLE CHICKEN WITH YOUR BUTT REALLY ISNT THAT REMARKABLE.

I'M SIMPLY ARGUING THAT I COULD DO HOLD A WHOLE CHICKEN WITH MY BUTT. SINCE IT IS WELL WITHIN THE POSSIBILITIES OF HUMAN CAPABILITY, AND I AM A FULLY FUNCTIONING HUMAN, IT IS THEREFORE IN NO WAY UNLIKELY THAT I COULD NOT HOLD A WHOLE CHICKEN WITH MY BUTT.
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beem0r

Con

Perhaps I was too quick to call your statement remarkable. However, an unremarkable statement still does require some level of evidence to back it up.
If I made a debate entitled "I am a 50 year old black woman," I would have to prove that I in fact was. Anyone reading the debate would know that it's quite possible that I am in fact a 50 year old black woman, but that doesn't mean I am. I would have to verify in some way that I was, else I would not have met my burden of proof.

Also, hilding it with your butt AND another object is not holding it with your butt. You would have to grasp the chicken with only your cheeks to be holding a whole chicken with your butt. By using the wall, your butt would not be holding the WHOLE chicken. Just as "I can fly" would not be proven with me riding in a plane, since it's the plane flying, not me.

Regardless, the fact remains: not everyone has the cheek strength required to hold a whole chicken. You must give us some reason to believe that you have this capability. Simply stating it does not make it true, nor does coming up with hypothetical statements when we don't know if you can apply them in reality.

You have simply stated something. Something that for all we know, could be possible. This does not meet your burden of proof.
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 Debate Round No. 2
sweatycreases

Pro

ALL RIGHT THEN. SINCE I OBVIOUSLY CANNOT SHOW VISUAL PROOF THEN I WILL HAVE TO USE ANOTHER EXAMPLE. ANY PERSON COULD HOLD A WHOLE CHICKEN WITH THEIR BUTT IF IF WAS JAMMED UP THERE FAR ENOUGH. YOU COULD USE A LEG BUT IF THAT DIDNT WORK YOU MAY HAVE TO MANIPULATE THE CHICKEN INTO A MORE FAVORABLE SHAPE. GRANTED THAT THIS MAY CAUSE EXTREME PHYSICAL HARM, ANY PERSON COULD STILL DO IT - THUS PROVING THAT I CAN HOLD A WHOLE CHICKEN WITH MY BUTT.
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beem0r

Con

While it may be true that some people are capable of doing this, a relatively few number would have the willpower to go through with it.

Consider the following statement: "I can eat the contents of an entire jar of mayonnaise in a timespan of 30 minutes." While this is true for some people, I know I personally could never do such a thing. Perhaps I _could_ if my life was in danger and that was all I could do to save myself, but the word used is _can_. Under the current circumstances, I _cannot_ eat an entire jar worth of mayo in 30 minutes, simply because I would not have the willpower necessary. In the same way, I doubt that you would be capable of shoving a whole chicken up your butt, in a way that, as you yourself admitted, could cause extreme physical harm. I know _I_ couldn't, and neither I nor the voters have a good enough reason to believe that you can.

Thanks for the debate.
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 Debate Round No. 3
Post a Comment
20 comments have been posted on this debate. Showing 1 through 10 records.
Posted by sydnerella 12 years ago
sydnerella
WOW. I'm super jealous. I wish my anal cavity had as much talent. XD

Sounds to me like a mutation of the murphy drip!
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Posted by DeletedUser 13 years ago
DeletedUser
Sweatycreases, your caps are hurting my retinas.
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Posted by Yraelz 14 years ago
Yraelz
Lol, I will take the debate that we are all the same person, that would be rather fascinating. I may even instigate it.
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Posted by Kleptin 14 years ago
Kleptin
And brittwaller as well. Don't forget Brittwaller.
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Posted by Kleptin 14 years ago
Kleptin
BTW, I probably won't accept a challenge for the Yraelz/LogicalMaster/Kleptin debate because I somewhat agree that we're all the same person.

As of now, I'm starting to suspect that Beem0r is also me.
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Posted by Kleptin 14 years ago
Kleptin
It's quite easy actually.

1. Place yourself face down on the floor.
2. Take whole chicken and place gently on top of butt.

You are now holding a whole chicken with your butt.
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Posted by SportsGuru 14 years ago
SportsGuru
to voters:

How can beem0r lose? As beem0r pointed out, pro has a burden of proof which pro did not fulfill and automatically loses.
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Posted by Logical-Master 14 years ago
Logical-Master
On second thought, challenge Kleptin instead since he particularly ask about a debate on this matter in his profile.
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Posted by Logical-Master 14 years ago
Logical-Master
Actually, someone challenge me to a debate on the matter of "Logical-Master, Yraelz, and Kleptin are the same person." I'd like to see the "valid evidence" (assuming there is any) people have collected.
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Posted by Logical-Master 14 years ago
Logical-Master
Oh, NOW I remember why I came here. How the heck is beem0r losing?
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12
39 votes have been placed for this debate. Showing 1 through 10 records.
Vote Placed by NiamC 7 years ago
NiamC
sweatycreasesbeem0rTied
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Vote Placed by 9spaceking 7 years ago
9spaceking
sweatycreasesbeem0rTied
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Vote Placed by Koopin 12 years ago
Koopin
sweatycreasesbeem0rTied
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Vote Placed by Nails 12 years ago
Nails
sweatycreasesbeem0rTied
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Vote Placed by Chaosflame 12 years ago
Chaosflame
sweatycreasesbeem0rTied
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Vote Placed by ilovgoogle 12 years ago
ilovgoogle
sweatycreasesbeem0rTied
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Vote Placed by tribefan011 12 years ago
tribefan011
sweatycreasesbeem0rTied
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Vote Placed by ToastOfDestiny 12 years ago
ToastOfDestiny
sweatycreasesbeem0rTied
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Vote Placed by Lexicaholic 12 years ago
Lexicaholic
sweatycreasesbeem0rTied
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Vote Placed by Charlie_Danger 13 years ago
Charlie_Danger
sweatycreasesbeem0rTied
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