The Instigator
Minddagger
Pro (for)
Tied
0 Points
The Contender
WohMi
Con (against)
Tied
0 Points

If kaiju would exist are we allowed to smash the female ones?

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Voting Style: Open Point System: 7 Point
Started: 2/20/2018 Category: Funny
Updated: 2 years ago Status: Post Voting Period
Viewed: 585 times Debate No: 108284
Debate Rounds (3)
Comments (6)
Votes (0)

 

Minddagger

Pro

Yes, they are thicc, and if we do, they will get pregnant and they wont attack Tokyo anymore.
WohMi

Con

Problem with your overly-sexualized statement: Males. What are you gonna do with males? Also, kaijus are freaking huge. I doubt any humans penis would even help. Also, cross-breeding wouldn't work.
Debate Round No. 1
Minddagger

Pro

well kaiju are mutants made from the earth, and since we are part of the earth they have human DNA, also jet jaguar has proven that we can grow to the size of them with certain technology, the males won't even show up be cause we took their women.
WohMi

Con

Your plan has an incredible amount of flaws. Anyway, here are all your flaws.
1. Kaiju don't exist. This fact is less of a stepping stone, and more of a massive wall that goes on forever. 2. If they did exist, how could we tell if they were male or female. The Kaijus, since they're made of the earth, wouldn't the ground just make more, not them? Don't they just come out of the portal in Pacific Rim? They could be genderless. 3. Kaijus are freaking giant. Attempting to reproduce or simply have sex with them wouldn't work. It just wouldn't. Also, how would we be able to capture them in the first place? Like I said, they're giant. 4. Since Kaijus generally act the same, what makes you think the female would be so acceptant of having sex with you? She'd probably eat you. "But I could be giant!" She'd probably still attack you. 5. Kaiju aren't "thicc." I think it's a high probablity that you watch Kaiju Girls, or some other gross anime that sexualizes them. I think a better reference point would be the Godzilla movie, or just googling images of Kaijus, or watching Pacific Rim. (It's a really good movie.) 6. Just because the Kaiju share DNA with Humans doesn't mean we can cross breed. We share around 60% of human DNA with a fruit fly. A FRUIT FLY! 7. I have no idea where you got this whole thing that "Humans can grow with jet jaguar technology." JET JAGUAR IS FROM A MOVIE, Godzilla vs Megalon. It's faked. Those people are wearing suits. Humans can't grow to that size. It's impossible. 8. The males will show up. Both male and female kaijus, in movies like Pacific Rim and Godzilla, release pheromones that tell other kaijus that they wish to mate. Now you have this situation. You've somehow captured a female kaiju, discovered she has a vagina, pinned her down so she can't attack you, grown yourself to be giant, put on sufficient protection so you don't get stabbed by their rocky bodies, which is all very expensive by the way, and then twenty males smash through into your lab, and start destroying everything. Congrats. 9. Ok, so none of the past things count now. Just ignore them while reading this question. You've successfully had sex with a kaiju. Congrats. Now what? Do you release the Kaiju? Kill it? Or do you keep it to have sex again. Mind you, all of this is incredibly expensive. Unless you're a multi-trillionare, or you're the ruler of the world, you woulnd't have enough money to do this. And for what? What are the benefits of having sex with a kaiju? Simply pleasure. For the love of all that's holy, get your head out of the gutter. This plan will never work, and even if it does work, all you get to say is "I had sex with a Kaiju."

I think it's best for you to just stick to watching those SFM or 3D animated kaiju porn.
Debate Round No. 2
Minddagger

Pro

"kaiju don't exist. This fact is less of a stepping stone, and more of a massive wall that goes on forever"

you have misread my title "IF kaiju exist" so it

" If they did exist, how could we tell if they were male or female. The Kaijus, since they're made of the earth, wouldn't the ground just make more, not them? Don't they just come out of the portal in Pacific Rim? They could be genderless."

Well, how would they make more? i'm pretty sure LEGION lays eggs. plus toho has confirmed the kaiju's genders.

"Kaijus are freaking giant. Attempting to reproduce or simply have sex with them wouldn't work. It just wouldn't. Also, how would we be able to capture them in the first place? Like I said, they're giant."

You haven't read my statement about jet Jaguar, if kaiju exist, we would have the technology of jet's growing ability

"Since Kaijus generally act the same, what makes you think the female would be so acceptant of having sex with you? She'd probably eat you. "But I could be giant!" She'd probably still attack you."

oh really? in godzilla vs biolantte, (spoiler alert) we saw a professor turn into biolantte, we could try using slimier ways, to turn into male kaiju, so the females would think we are male AND the same species as them.

"just because the Kaiju share DNA with Humans doesn't mean we can cross breed. We share around 60% of human DNA with a fruit fly. A FRUIT FLY!"

well have you ever tried smashing a fruit fly of the same size?

ok, so none of the past things count now. Just ignore them while reading this question. You've successfully had sex with a kaiju. Congrats. Now what? Do you release the Kaiju? Kill it? Or do you keep it to have sex again. Mind you, all of this is incredibly expensive. Unless you're a multi-trillionare, or you're the ruler of the world, you wouldn't have enough money to do this. And for what? What are the benefits of having sex with a kaiju? Simply pleasure. For the love of all that's holy, get your head out of the gutter. This plan will never work, and even if it does work, all you get to say is "I had sex with a Kaiju."

so every thing you typed is meaningless before this? i already told you what the purpose was, we get them pregnant, and while their weak, we will use some giant robots to kill them off, and without females to reproduce with, the rest of the kaiju will die off, saving tokyo, and plus, yeah it is expensive, but you don't even have to do the dirty work, you can just make a machine that turns people into kaiju, and hire people to go inside.

and with the machine made, all the machine will pay for itself, and Tokyo is saved!
WohMi

Con

I'm really starting to think that you don't care about saving Japan, and you care more about having sex with a kaiju.

You say LEGION lays eggs. Okay? Then you have to get LEGION, which is in another dimension which humans can't even survive in.

You say that I didn't read that statement on Jet Jaguar. I DID. Please read number 7 from my last debate. Also, if a Kaiju appeared from the middle of nowhere in the Pacific, we wouldn't instantly have Jet Jaguar Science.

Ok, a professor turns into Biolantte. So, now you're a Kaiju. I take it in the movie, you remember the parts where Biolante destroys everything while fighting with Godzilla? I haven't watched the movie, but I take it, since there's an entire franchise, the professor never changes back into a human? Not to mention that movie was Kaiju-On-Kaiju fighting. What makes you think a female kaiju still won't attack you?

No, I haven't tried having sex with a fruit fly. Nor would I want to do it with a giant one. Even so, if I did do those things, the fruit fly won't get pregnant. I hate to use this as an example, but there is bestiality porn on the internet, and if a horse or dog ejaculates in the human, the human does NOT get pregnant, and vice versa. Also, making a kaiju pregnant is the single most AWFUL way to destroy the kaiju. Even if you could successfully get a kaiju pregnant, you're HELPING THE KAIJU REPRODUCE. THERE'S GOING TO BE MORE NOW.

I like how Con says "Yeah it is expensive" like its just some small fact. You have to: Make a machine that turns people into Kaiju (MAKING MORE KAIJU. Also, I doubt anyone would like to be killed after they save the world.) How exactly will this machine pay for itself? It won't. It'll be useless after the kaiju are gone. You also have to clear out an area for the kaiju-humans to have sex, or make a large enough restraining area. We also need to make GIANT ROBOTS, which, yet again, will be useless once they die.

"You don't have to do the dirty work." What you just described is an incredible amount of dirty work.

How to stop Kaiju's invasion the right way. (Note: I'm using Pacific Rim logic.)

Step 1. Drop the biggest bomb you can get on or near the vortex at the bottom of the ocean. What this does is close up the gap. Nice.
Step 2. Laugh at how easily that plan was comparing to having sex with Kaiju.

You know, I think I missed out on Con's original statement. "if kaiju would exist would we be allowed to smash the female ones" Simple answer? Yes. Go ahead. I doubt any government would help you. You can try to do it in your normal size, but, I think the kaiju would smash you. Literally.

Debate Round No. 3
6 comments have been posted on this debate. Showing 1 through 6 records.
Posted by Minddagger 2 years ago
Minddagger
eh, i would make the same mistake, we cool?
Posted by WohMi 2 years ago
WohMi
Hey, I just clicked debate. You looked like you actually meant it, so I accepted. Didn't see the "funny" until now.
Posted by Minddagger 2 years ago
Minddagger
and on that note, please dont tell me kaiju girls actually exist.
Posted by Minddagger 2 years ago
Minddagger
dude, did you even read the category?
Posted by WohMi 2 years ago
WohMi
I regret taking this debate. All this 17 year old is thinking about is having sex with a Kaiju. It's pretty shameful.
Posted by MythacalKat 2 years ago
MythacalKat
umm wtf
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