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Story Debate: Thriller

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Voting Style: Open Point System: Select Winner
Started: 6/15/2015 Category: Arts
Updated: 3 years ago Status: Post Voting Period
Viewed: 1,256 times Debate No: 76576
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Hey all, thanks for checking this out. Didn't really have space to put the rules, but you can find them here:

Main rules: Actually write it like a story, follow the order of events, character reactions should be realistic.

Pepe's goal is to get rid of Lucy. Con will try to stop him, and Pro will try to help.
Please comment!

My papa kissed me on my forehead, patted the covers on the bed, told me that he loves me, and left. He looked for the switch for a short second, like he did every night ever since we moved in half a year ago, and closed the door. This one night, as ordinarily as it began, was to be remembered by me for ever.

I fell asleep fast, and I dreamt of a silvery gray horse trotting up to me in our town. I would grab his white mane, and sit comfortably on his back, and we would both gallop past the houses, the bricks and streets, into the open fields and hills. Always riding into the sunset, which only seemed to get larger and larger as we approached it.I could feel the wind in my hair, and I let go to raise my hands into the air. The horse would whinny with happiness, tossing his head with every sound.

And then he started slowing down, trotting a circle to lose speed and finally stopping next to a mud-filled ditch.

“Faster horsie.” I urged, swinging my heels like cowboys did in the movies. The horse craned his neck around and looked at me with an evil-looking grin.

“Have you ever heard on animal rights, you little punk?” it said, tossing me off it’s back and into the muddy ditch. I hit the cold water with a splash, slowly sinking to the bottom, never feeling it.

I woke up, stiff with fear. No, I was simply back in my room, back under the covers, back where there were no such evil horses or infinite puddles. My muscles relaxed, and I put my head on the pillow. I was still very tired.

“Hee, hee hee. Your dreams are so stupid, so very naive. Oh yes, very naive.” A woman cackled. “And so easy to breach!”

“Is there someone here?” I asked aloud, sitting up in my bed.

“Oh yes, of course I’m here.” she whined, stretching it like my sister when I asked stupid questions.

“W-Where are you?”

“Oh, the question is: Am I? I cannot be somewhere if I even am not, you silly little boy.” she sniffled. Suddenly, a pair of hands covered my eyes and pushed me back to the pillow. I thrashed with them for a short second, but she was gone. Only her irritating cackle remained, growing louder at the fright she’d just pulled on me.

“Oh, you silly little puppet - “

I turned around, expecting to see her behind me. Nothing. Just the bedposts and the wall, glowing in the moonlight from the window.

“I’m right here. Peek-a-boo, you stupid little boy.”

I turned around to face the wall opposite my bed. There she was, her silhouette illuminated inside the wall by a weak blue light. Her black dress flowed around her bare feet, and her extremely long hair covered the entire wall, as if she was floating in water.

“So, do you wanna go back to sleep so I can mess up your dream again?”

I was paralyzed for a second. The room was turning icy cold, and my hair stood on end. Her hair floated around, her shade seeming to mock me. Shade. She was a shade.

I got up out on my bed, and headed towards the door. I didn’t even look at her, with her threatening spikes curving around from her head. I hit the light switch, and got blinded by the flash of brightness.

I blinked, adjusting to the light. The wall, it was it’s usual shapeless blue, the plaster not containing any cracks at all. And she was gone.

“Stupid goon, trying to get rid of me so early?” her voice was like icicles growing down my spine. Why did it always come from behind my back? I could hear her breathing in, and blowing, as if she was extinguishing a candle. The lights went out. I screamed.

It was a long scream. Not the type you give when somebody touches you, or when my sister jumps out of a closet to scare me. It was different, long, because I knew that, whatever she was, she was in the darkness. And she hated me.

I stopped only after several seconds. I could hear my dad banging his head in the darkness, someone else running down the stairs.

“Now, little boy. Go back to bed, pretend it was nothing to not get in trouble.” her voice was, as usual, behind me. I hated her, because I did just that. I crawled back into bed, and waited for my father’s hand to open the door, look for the switch, and turn on the lights.

“What has happened, Pepito?” my dad’s voice had a strong hispanic accent. He stood in the doorway. The shade wasn’t on the wall anymore.


“Oh, I know it wasn’t nada.” He looked at me, and I noticed that the covers were too crooked to hide anything.

“Papa, is there anything wrong with that wall?” Papa walked over to to wall, looked it over, felt the plaster and finally even knocked on it in different places.

“Nothing is wrong, Pepito.” he said, looking at me disapprovingly. He ventured next to my bed. “Did you have a mal dream?”

“Si” I responded. The only bit of Spanish I felt confident in, that word was always there for conversations with Papa. He nodded, looking a bit irritated.

“Well, if you have any more, come sleep with me and Mama. It’ll be better,” he winked, and left. His hand searched for the switch for a second before the lights were off, and the door closed. I was left in the darkness.

“So, is it true that you got a D on you Spanish quiz?! It was only counting to ten, and it’s your very own language, you insolent child. A shame. Did you tell your Papa yet?” Her voice came from above the bed posts, reminding me of the stuffed papers in the bottom of my backpack that Papa shouldn’t find. No, I didn’t.

“But he knows, you know. You can’t hide something forever.” her voice pervaded the room. I pulled the covers closer. “Yet he constantly shows off his flawless accent. He’s taunting you, Pepe.”

I picture the look of irritation of my father’s face, the way he barely looked when I pointed to the wall. He didn’t even say goodnight

“He doesn’t love you at all, he’s just pretending for Mama. And when she leaves, where will you be?” I try to shut out her voice, pushing pillows around my ears.

Suddenly, the pillows are ripped from my grasp, and pulled to the wall. There she was, her shade, her halo, her flowing dress, and floating, electricity-fed hair.

“No, he loves me. He says so every night.” I explain to her

“Your ignorance is slightly amusing. But seriously, who do you think you are kidding? He says it every night, but does it feel real?” I notice how her shadow doesn’t move, yet her voice still projects behind me. And suddenly I understand that, despite the way she treats me, the way she invades my dreams, she is right.

“N-no. It doesn’t feel real at all.” With my words, I could almost feel my heart becoming heavier, my soul noticing that it has been pushed around by Papa. I could change that.

“And, guess what? We can change that.” she swims closer, until her shade finally rips free of the wall and comes up right in front on my face so that our noses are almost touching and I can see nothing but her shadow. Her hair floats behind her, slowly enveloping me and the bed. The cold is pervasive, and I can see my breath on her dark outline.

“I can take care of your traitor - “ she says. I could feel ice running down my back, and watch as her hair covers all from view. I glimpse a slight shadow on the side wall, another being, before her spikes cover all.

“If you do something for me.”

Her offer stands, seemingly made of real matter, hanging between us on a thread. Here was a shadow woman, showing me how to live a freer life, free of my Papa’s tyrannies, free of fakes, free of everyone. She twists suddenly, so that the wall becomes visible. Her hair somehow floats around to give me a clear view of the plaster and nothing else. Her long, bony finger extends to point forward.

“Destroy that wall and free my true form, and I will make you the reaper of men.”

I looked forward. That plaster, bright blue during the day, was only a gray matter now, and I had to destroy it. That, and nothing else. And I would not have to put up with Papa, I could flaunt my older sister, I could skip Spanish class, I could do anything. I would become the reaper of men.

“Yes” I said, and I instantly wanted to take it back. The words weren’t mine, they were hers, and I could feel as they were thrust upon me.

“The first smart decision you made, young man.” her shadow withdrew, slowly falling back to the wall. “I think I made a mistake, starting off the wrong foot.” Her form was now fully inside the wall again, the hair stretching and finally coming to a stop in her iconic position. The silhouette of her touched the ground, and reached her hand out.

“My name is Lucy.” she said, and rested her palm on the other side of the wall. “Short for Lucifer.”

I threw my bedsheets off, and walked up to the plaster. Her hand was dark, and a shadow as she was. The cold grew as I approached her, freezing my toes. I longed to be back under my covers, but this had to be done first. I held my hand out, and placed my palm on the shadow on Lucy’s palm. Instantly, my hand froze to the plaster, so even when I tried to retrieve it, my hand was stuck.

Lucy smiled, and slowly took her hand off. My palm similarly unfroze, and I held it back. Looking for another short second at the wondrous hair,, I noticed that her halo was slight, and blue. One could barely make her out from the dark plaster. I retrieved the pillows, and was about to go back to bed when Lucy spoke again.

“Little boy?” her tone was commanding, as if she expected something from me. I thought for a second, before turning to face her. Slowly, I bowed down until I thought I was at the right angle, then slowly going back up. I could see Lucy’s face stretch into a grin, and put the pillows back on the bed. I pulled the covers onto my PJ’s, and rested my head.

“Goodnight, little boy.”

What have I just done?



Thanks Con, now I will proceed to my own opening story as according to the rules you've outlined. Unlike Con though I will refer to the main character in this as "the boy", "he", or "Pepito"--and not as "I".

When he [Pepito] eventually woke up, he's realized exactly what he'd just done. "How could I ever do such a thing?". he asked himself. He'd essentially just aligned himself with the devil--referred to in this story as Lucifer, and could not fully comprehend why. Was it because he wanted to rebel against his father? Obviously, that was a large component; along with Lucy's natural manipulative skills. She, this nasty devil, was exerting her evil influence over an innocent boy. And there was only a few small ways that he could stop her from continuing her power and building on the control that she'd already exerted. The power he would give in to her, the stronger and more ferocious she would become--and the more he would lose his touch with G-d, who was really his only true saviour.

After this treacherous night. the boy had decided to try and reconcile himself with the bible and the teachings of G-d and Yeshua. He needed to find a way to remove *this* Lucy from out of his life and to stop her from ever getting back in it. On this one very evening she had presented herself out of nowhere, and completely took control of this boy without him even realizing or fully comprehending it. She had, almost magically, just overpowered his senses.

So, he proceeded to look into the Bible and read its every word--looking at as many chapters as he could and taking in G-ds word to the best of his ability. He was able to determine the difference between "right" and "wrong", and recognize that the devil [Lucifer] was a evil creature who stood for nothing but death and destruction, so with this in mind he had to find a way and seek the strength and lovingness of the L-rd There was only one thing in this world that could save his spirit from sin--and that was Him, G-d. As the boy looked through the many biblical pages, he stumbled across one particular verse that would be a source of inspiration for him, it was Ephesians 6:11 and read:

"Put on the full armor of G-d, so that you will be able to stand firm against the schemes of the devil."

After thinking about this quote, Con had the truth of the Lucifer confirmed in his mind. This devil was very obviously not to be trusted and he [the boy] had to withstand her seducing powers as much as he could. For Lucky was not what she seemed, she was the evil one and had the exclusive aim of leading the boy astray and distorting his innocent character. She was not here even to bring fleshy pleasures to him, but to destroy his soul and connection to G-d. Taking away people's natural goodness and loyalty to G-d [as well as their hope of salvation]
was the primary goal for Lucy.

He then discovered the story of Yeshua [Jesus] being entering the desert for 40 days and 40 nights, and then being tempted by the devil. The story is as follows:

Matisyahu 4:1 "Then Yeshua was led up by the Spirit into the wilderness to be tempted by the devil."

Matisyahu 4:2 "And when He had fasted forty days and forty nights, afterward He was hungry."

Matisyahu 4:3 "Now when the tempter came to Him, he said, "If You are the Son of G-d, command that these stones become bread."

Matisyahu 4:4 "But He answered and said,’It is written, Man shall not live on bread alone, but on every word that comes from the mouth of G-d.”

Matisyahu 4:5 Then the devil took Him up into the holy city, set Him on the pinnacle of the temple.

Matisyahu 4:6 "And said to Him, "If You are the Son of G-d, throw Yourself down. For it is written: ‘He shall give His angels charge over you’, and, ‘In their hands they shall bear you up, Lest you dash your foot against a stone’."

Matisyahu 4:7 "Yeshua said to him, “It is written again, ‘You shall not tempt the L-rd your G-d.”

Matisyahu 4:8 "Again, the devil took Him up on an exceedingly high mountain, and showed Him all the kingdoms of the world and their glory."

Matisyahu 4:9 "And he said to Him, "All these things I will give You if You will fall down and worship me."

Matisyahu 4:10 "Then Yeshua said to him, Away with you, Satan! For it is written, ‘You shall worship the L-rd your G-d, and Him only you shall serve’.”

Matisyahu 4:11 "Then the devil left Him, and behold, angels came and ministered to Him."

Then in Elior [Luke] 4:1, it states:

"Then Yeshua, being filled with the Holy Spirit, returned from the Jordan and was led by the Spirit into the wilderness."

And then after flicking through more of the pages of the B'rit Hadasha [New Testament], he found the very well-known verse of Matisyahu 6:13:

"And do not lead us into temptation, but deliver us from evil. For Yours is the kingdom and the power and the glory forever. Amen."

He re-read these particular verses and the truth of how exactly Lucy was, and what her existence was about, was fully realized by him. He knew that the only way defeat Lucy was to *not* give into her an identify her for exactly what she was; evil.

The way to do this was by deepening his faith in G-d and Yeshua, and by keeping his soul as pure as possible. There is no doubt that after her first triumph over his character that Lucy would be back--and within even more extreme methods of devouring the boys goodness and bringing him further from G-d, and his family.

After reading the bible, he thought to himself: "I must pray", "I must seek G-ds help and show him my devotion.". So he went into his bedroom, standing up at the window and looking at the sky, which was bright and shining down upon him--awaking all of his senses and keeping his focus fully on G-d. He said:

"G-d, I am so deeply sorry that I have sinned and given into the devil, I gave into her when I should of been thinking of you. You are the only one true G-d in this world, and the one whom she [Lucy] hates. I ask for your forgiveness and for you to give me the strength to resist the temptation of the devil, please, G-d. You are the one I love and the one whom my loyalty is with, you are the one that gave me life. My attention must be with you and only with you."

He felt the sun deepening on his face and then experienced an immediate rise in his spirit--as if the presence and love of G-d was truly with him. "He does love me", the boy said to himself. He knew that by making a full effort to defeat Lucy and maintaining his belief in G-d, that he would win. After this he all of a sudden heard a knock on his door, "hola, Pepito", his father shouted, "are you hungry?", adding "your madre has made something for you to eat". The boy realized that he had barely eaten all day due to last nights endeavours, and his horror at them, so he responded "Si padre, I am very hungry". After confiding in G-d and placing his burdens on him, he had genuinely felt his appetite grow.

He quickly followed his father downstairs, and then sat in the chair at the table that was nearest to his mother. He smiled at her and she gave a warm, welcoming smile back. "How are you my baby"? She asked, "Okay madre, I am good" without really going into a significant amount of detail. She presented the food and they all ate and sat together as a family. Mid-way into the meal, he caught his little sister staring at the olives on his plate, it was clear to Pepito that she wanted them although she'd already had some of her own. He actually really wanted them to and was specifically saving them for that time, however, he looked at his little sister and said "oh, here you go, you can have them", and she gave back a wide grin.

The boy had sacrificed something [no matter how little] out of the goodness of his heart and because he knew it was a pure thing to do, he was not thinking of his own wants or desires but was prioritizing those of his family. He felt elevated after, and offered to help his mother with tidying the table and cleaning the dishes. He eagerly accepted with a loud "Si!" and they both got to work while his sister and father went to play.

After his mother and he finished, they joined the other two in the garden and they sat down, relaxed and looked at the beautiful sky above them; as well as taking in and observing the stunning and unspoilt nature that surrounded them. The flowers, the orange grove, the grass, the birds, and the air. All were taking a moment to admire G-ds work, they work that they made specifically for His people.

At this point, Pepito felt far away from Lucy and her evil was absolutely determined to keep it that way. In a few hours, he had re-gained his connection to G-d and seen the truth more than ever. He knew that by staying good, everything would be good--and G-d, would never, ever, leave or desert him in his hour of need. All he needed to do when Lucy came was pray to the L-rd and keep Him in his in his heart.

There's a saying that goes if you've seen the devil, you have seen G-d, and he knew without doubt that he had seen and felt G-d--and that this was so much more wonderful and "right" than seeing Lucy.

Now over to you Con, looking forward to your next post.
Debate Round No. 1


The wall was illuminated by the moonlight pouring through the window. Was she gone? She must be, it's almost midnight and she hasn't shown her face yet. I let my head back and tried to force myself to sleep. Lucy must be waiting for something; it's hard to believe that she just left. Unless... I smiled. It has worked; not that I thought it wouldn't, but maybe I doubted a little. God has answered my prayers.
"Expecting someone?" her voice came from behind the bedposts. The ring was so sweet, I almost asked her where she'd been for the past several hours.
"Oh, yes you are. You've been waiting for me and given up only now." she said through a genuine smile. "Well, here I am. Do you have something to tell me?"
"Leave me alone," I say. Her voice dissappears, not continuing it's tirade for a minute. Then two. Then three. Is she still here? Did she actually listen to me? I consider looking at the wall, but push it out of my mind. But then another minute passes. And another, and the urge to just look up, to just check if I am truly alone or not overcomes me.
I immediately regret it. The wall was horrifyingly covered in her shadow, the hair floating free in gentle curves, her girlish body seeming to be lightweight and even a bit frail. The blue light shone from behind her, making the outline distinguishable from the rest of the walls dark mass. The moonlight from the window shone on the shadow's head, making the shadow more visible instead of less.
"Ha, I told you. You can't resist it, can you?" she laughs, and her laugh is somehow different than yesterday, yet truly the same. "And that's with the bible under you covers, right?" I squeeze the tattered book harder into my chest. It was the only copy in the house.
"I-I don't want you." my voice came out faltering.
"That book, by the way, is pretty much made up. Written by men, men who sinned, men who killed, men who eventually all got slain." her logic seemed to come over me like a wave. "Another God actually exists though, but he is much different than described."
"Another God? What do you mean?"
"Oh, surely you know? I helped him make the world. I designed the water and air, the land and fire, and you too. It was really simple, I took parts of him, cut them into something more acceptable, and put them into this world."
"You're lying. You couldn't be God, because God is good"
"Ahh, naive like ever. I'm not God, I'm only semi-God, because I am not everything. And the other God besides me isn't always good." Her shade seemed to shake it's head in a disappointed manner. "You shouldn't alway believe what men tell you, especially if their teachings lasted throughout eons."
I fought with myself to contain my thoughts. God wasn't good? What kind of logic is that?
"Do you want me to explain?" she asked, her voice filled with honey. I kept silent, trying to shut her out. "Even your bible says so: God is everything. He is all of the stars, all of the animals and waters and fires of this world, and much more of other worlds." A pause, and she takes a breath. "And guess what. God is good, and evil as well. Which makes him somewhat upredictable."
I didn't get to think it over, because at that moment my Papa came and turned on the light switch, for once finding it perfectly. The light was blinding, and I immediately squeezed my eyes shut to block out the light. My eyes still hurt, feeling as if they were shriveling up in the overabundance of brightness, so I plopped my head into a pillow. It was still unbearable.
"Lucifer?" Papa's voice was changed, sounding as though if was filled with a certain happiness. I wasn't used to that. "Lucifer. This is my lamb, whom you have set your snares on. I will protect him, so do not approach."
"Why, uh, hello." I heard Lucy's unsure voice for the first time ever. "I thought we had a deal, remember? The Job repeat?"
"The deal is over, you have come too far with this child." Papa's hand touched my shoulder, and it was blissfully cool compared to the heat of the room. I felt liquid sunshine slowly pour into me, flowing down through my body.
"Why, you backstabbing little filch!" she screamed, and I shivered. She was going to try to kill me, the girl, and I couldn't even see in the light. Papa's hand dissappeared, and it was only then that I noticed that the palce where he had touched was blistering. Papa wasn't cool, he was boiling hot.
Something fell against the floor, and the lights went out. Quite slowly pervaded the room, as the short struggle was settled. Footsteps echoed oddly on the carpet, and the door was opened. I looked up. Everything was black, my eyes not used to the darkness, and I couldn't even see the window. Something was thrown out the door, and it was gently closed shut. Papa sat down on my bed, and I could hear the springs creaking under his weight. That wasn't Papa; Papa was heavier.
I blinked several times, trying to adjust. I was sweaty, but the heat seemed to seep away through the walls, and I could even feel a small breeze as it did so. Within moments, the moonlight from the window was visible. I turned towards the person sitting on my bed.
It was her.
Her hair was winding around her, the tips of the shadowy spikes were burnt and still live embers nested there. Her dress seemed tattered, and blew lightly with the breeze, and her bare feet hung over the side of the bed, not even reaching the floor yet. But she was there.
"You're hurt," she said softly. Though I could see only the silhuette, I could tell that her eyes were boring into me. I didn't know how to react, so I didn't.
Her smooth arms reached up to turn me around so that my back was facing towards her.
"Right here," she said, and I could feel her cold touch on the place where I was burnt. My shirt had a tattered hole in it right where the man touched me. She rested her palm on the spot, and the blissful ice came back into my shoulder.
"What-Who was that?" my voice shook.
"It was Him." she replied. The voice came from behind my back, for once matching it's source. But, how could she get rid of God is He is all-powerful? "You invited me to this room, so here I am more powerful than Him. He's gone now, don't worry." she read my mind.
"Why, why did he burn me?"
"He's a bit fed up with the whole situation, I guess." she lifts her hand off, and my shoulder returns to normal temperature. I don't turn around, because it's better if her voice and her position match. "Pepe, there's something more I have to tell you."
"Do you know who Job is? He is in the Old Testament, did you come across his story?" She watches as I shake my head. "The Old Testament is safe, you can look for his story in that bible of yours." She lifts the covers, looking for the book. But suddenly, I realize that I was holding it when the man walked in, but now I didn't feel it in my arms. I look as well, patting down the sides of the bed.
"He took it with him, the smart thing." She glances under the bed from her sitting position before giving up. "Oh well, the story goes like this
There was once a man named Job, and he was not only a servant of God but also very rich and prosperous. He had seven beautiful daughters, a lovely wife, a grand house and much, much money. Well, God once came to me, and asked me to test Job. Since I really didn't think anyone could believe in the phony that God is, I agreed. Well, little did I know that He drove Job mad, inciting an unjustified love for God in his servant. He didn't play fair. So, I actually tried to give up, but he told me to continue. So what could I do? First I burned down his property, then took away his money, but his craziness persisted. I asked God again to release me from the challenge, but he denied it. So I killed his wife, and Job broke down. He wept for days and days, for a whole month, and then for another month after that. It was then that I realized I couldn't continue. So I told God that I haven't the power in me, and he released me. But then, just to show me, he killed Job's daughers. Every night, the man wept and cried to God, and I could see Him preparing to take the next beauty to her deathbed..And the worst part was that they all came to me after death, because all humans used to. And then accused me, they shouted at me, infected with the same madness that Job had... And that is when I changed. Because, unlike him, I am not all and can be changed by others.
He eventually gave Job back what he had lost, but the eight dead remained and tortured me with cries. I've come to accept sinners more than him; I give out more second chances. But Life is the only gift I cannot give." her head bobbed up and down as she spoke, turning to the window to look out at time. Whenever she did that, I could see the silhuette of her nose, the wave of skin down to the mouth. Her eye depresssions were large, larger than I have ever seen anyone have.
She stopped suddenly, looking at the wall.
"Behind that wall, that's your parents bedroom, yes?" her voice seemed concerned.
"Yes" I looked at the wall. It seemed empty without her, because her shadow was still sitting on my bed. I noticed how the halo followed her around, even when she left the wall. "Why?"
"He's in there." she said, and suddenly became absolutely still. Her figure melted, slowly dripping into a puddle, gathering on the carpet. Soon, she was gone, only a hole remaining on the ground. I looked at it, and realized that it was indeed a hole. I could see the bottom floor. Should I stick my foot in, just to be sure?
Before I could even get up, the hole shot up into the air and formed Lucy back again. Her shadow seemed weaker, somehow more translucent, as she stood up off the bed.
"Go to sleep, nothing will happen until tomorrow." I obeyed, worrying a bit about her. She carefully walked back into the wall, her hair drooping just a bit. I pretended to be asleep, but watched her as she walked back and forth.
Her whispers were barely audible, but I caught it. "He killed the father. Why would he?"


Emilrose forfeited this round.
Debate Round No. 2


I yawned. The soft morning light streamed through the window, reaching my bed and creating a square of light on the covers. I turned over to look at the clock. 8:30 in the morning. I already missed Monday's school bus by half an hour.

I tossed the covers off and headed to the closet where I keep my clothes. Why didn't Mama wake me? She always does; every day at exactly seven o'clock. I quickly grab a shirt and a pair of jeans, throwing them onto the bed. Maybe the power went out? The alarms reset, and she didn't wake up herself. But then how would my clock work? Socks and spiderman underwear flew across the room to the bed.

I started dressing myself. Something was off, just a bit off. Why did she let me sleep until this late? Normally I got up last, and she first. I stopped myself.

I was looking right at the wall Lucy usually appears. Her shadow wasn't there, but I could just make an outline in my mind of where she should be. As if the color was just a tad darker in those spots; I could clearly distinguish her branching hair, her head, her dress, and her bare feet standing on the ground. She would be shorter than me.

That pose; I saw her yesterday. Right before going to sleep, she said something. That it would all start tomorrow? What would that even mean?

I decided to wake Mama in case something actually started.

I walked down the wooden hallway to my parents’ bedroom, which Papa called his “dormitorio”. The house was empty, I heard nothing but my footsteps patting on the floorboards. I stopped in front of their room, and held my ear to the door. Silence. And then a single short, metallic clink from the kitchen.

I slowly came into the kitchen. Our dining room was partially connected to it, and I could see my older sister sitting at the counter with a bowl of cheerios. The glass door behind her illuminated the room in a wonderful sunshine.

“Hi Juliet,” I said.

“Hey,” she replied quietly, pushing away the black hair to reveal her puffy eyes. Her gaze set itself of me for a second before falling back down to the cereal. The cheerios were already soggy and melted.

“Where’s Mama?” my question stood for a moment or two before she replied.

“At the hospital,” her eyebrows rose as she gave the terse answer, offering no further explanation. Her spoon whirled another lengthy circle in the milk.

“Is she waiting for a baby?” I asked. Papa always said that people waiting for babies had to go to the hospital often. That’s stupid. Couldn’t they just wait at home?

“No, she’s waiting for Papa” her voice cracked and she looked away. I could hear her trying to cover a sniffle, but I couldn’t see her eyes. I sat down in the place next to her, and put my arm on hers to give comfort.

“Do you have a boo-boo?” I asked, more inquisitively than in the comforting tone I wanted.

She stood up, and walked away into the bathroom, leaving the cereal behind and sniffling all the way. Cheerios were Julie’s favorite; she would always eat Cheerios in the morning. Yeah, something was definitely wrong.

The phone rang. I picked it up, and sat back down at the marble counter. The stool was too high for me, so I clamored up to sit on the cushion.

“Hellooo?” I spoke into where I thought the microphone was.

“Pepe? Is your sister there?” Mama’s voice sounded a bit dull on the other end, as if she was speaking while holding her nose.

“No, she’s in the bathroom.”

“Can you go get ella?”

I stood up, left the phone on the counter, and walked up to the bathroom door on my tippy-toes. I tapped the white paint with my knuckles before trying the handle. It was locked.

“Go away.” Julie said from behind the door.

“Mama is calling... She wants to talk to you.” I said. No response. I waited at the door, waiting for her to come out. She opened up, the door swooshed behind her, and she stormed off to the phone. I watched her pick it up and put it to her ear.


“I’m here, I’m here.” her voice was muffled by Julie’s head, but I could still make out Mama’s words.

“What happened?” My sister looked out the glass doors into our backyard.

“He’s dead.” A long pause. “The doctors say he choked on something in the middle on the night.”

Julie sat down and closed her eyes. I could see the sunshine creating a shadow with her pink nose. I slowly retreated to my bedroom, and closed the door behind me. It creaked like every other time I closed my bedroom. The wall was empty, except for the light tints of different colored paint that reminded me of Lucy.

“Are you okay?”her voice emanated from behind me. Her shadowy body suddenly came into view. She swam up to the wall, and stopped right in front of it to look at me, still standing by the door. Her hair took several seconds more to compensate, and slowly floated out to it’s regular position.

“My Papa died.” I said. My voice had no tone at all; it was all one whole monotonous syllable.

“I know. Exactly seven hours ago.” her hair finally froze in it’s perfect image, with no lock of hair crossing over another. It was enormous, expanding over the wall like cracks in the plaster.

I brought to mind yesterday’s unfinished conversation with Lucy, when she disappeared into my parents’ dormitorio for the slightest second. What did she say? That ‘He’ was in there... and then she melted into a hole on the floor. But, why? I decided to take off from where I couldn’t explain, and ask Lucy for details.

“I don’t really know. Maybe He was just letting his own anger out, and was justified by the fact that your Papa is a sinner. He hates sinners, but doesn’t usually do anything so drastic.” She paused, and her silhouetted head turned to look behind her.

“Can you bring him back?” my question came out before I realized how stupid it is. She looked at me from behind the wall again, and shook her head.

“I cannot give life,” she said. “Which is why I hesitate in taking it. But God is different.”

Suddenly, the coldness I felt upon entering the room grasped my insides. What would prevent him from doing it again? From killing Mama, or Julie? How would life be without them? I have already lost Papa; why should I lose any more?

Lucy tilted her head, and her hair was pulled along through the water.

“We have to stop Him from repeating this. Can you go get your sister?” she asked.

“But,” I thought aloud. “But my sister doesn’t know about you.”

An unmistakable smile curled up Lucy’s face. She shook her head, and looked at my blank face. At that moment I understood, and I smiled as well at the prospect of what will happen.

I stepped outside. It was a bit hotter in the corridor, and I noticed that Lucy cold doesn’t really bother me anymore. I walked off to the dining room, where I saw Juliet sitting at the table with her head down. I tapped her on the shoulder, and she attempted to slap my hand away.

“Juliet, listen,” I noticed that the phone was lying back in it’s place. She didn’t move. “Juliet, come on, I want to show you something.”

“I don’t wanna see it.” she replied, her voice cutting each letter short. I leaned on the table, and pretended to think for a minute. What could get her to follow me?

“Or I’ll show your boyfriend the ‘hello kitty’ underwear you have!” I taunted, and quickly backed up. Juliet reached for me a second too late, and stumbled out of her chair. I ran down the hallway, keeping myself out of her reach until I stopped at my bedroom. Silence. She hadn’t followed me.

“C’mon Julie, I’ll stop bugging you if you come for a second.” I ran back down to the kitchen, where I found her in her original position. “Please?” I pushed my face into her ear so that she couldn’t ignore me.

“Okay, fine. Fine. Like, what is so important to you right now?” She got up and followed me as I led her to my room. I let her go through first, and shut the door behind me as I walked in.

My sister stiffened, her muscles tensed up. She saw. I locked the door.

“Hey Juliet.” Lucy’s voice sounded morose, but nevertheless welcoming. My sister tried to back up into me, but I pushed her forward.

“Lucy. What are you doing?” my sister sounded surprised, and accusing at the same time. Did she already know her? I peeked out from behind my sister’s ripped jeans to see her shadow, dark as night, inside the wall. The sun clearly illuminated it, yet it only seemed to give Lucy’s shadow more clarity.

“Me? I’m saving your brother from what happened seven hours ago.” the figure said, and I heard it coming from behind the door. Juliet didn’t turn around, as if she was accustomed to hearing her.

“I told you not to talk to my brother unless - “

“ - it’s a life threatening situation.” Lucy finished. “And yes, it was. I don’t break deals, even ones that were made months ago.”

Juliet slowly walked around to sit on the bed. Her eyes seemed heavy, and she looked at me with worry.

“Did He come in?” she asked, directing the question at no one in particular. I let Lucy answer.

“Mm-hmm. He tried to kill Pepe, but I was there.” Lucy paused. “But then he went to the parents, who haven’t accepted me yet,” she sighed, and rolled her head at Julie. “You know how that went.”

Nobody spoke up after that, and Lucy’s words hung in the air like fire. Whoever made a sound first would have to clear that fire, and nobody really knew how. The words flowed to me, and I accepted because I knew who they came from.

“So, Lucy says that we can free her if we destroy the wall she’s in.” I said, and then noticed that I simply changed the topic. Julie stared at me, and Lucy grimaced.

“It’s a lot more technical than that. The wall doesn’t matter, you just have to show devotion by doing something hard. And it only releases me into you, so that you become me and I become you.” her words made my brain do a flip as it tried to concentrate, but Julie seemed to understand.

“So, how are we going to destroy, like, a brick wall?” she asked Lucy. “Because I’m definitely into protecting my family.”



Thanks Pro, apologies for the forfeit in the previous round; last weekend I was very busy.

Pepe was in total shock that his father had just died, though he tried his best to hide it and be strong for his little sister and mother. His mother had came home rather speechless and still wasn't fully able to comprehend that she'd just lost her husband and father to her children. "What will I do"? and "How will I now manage on my own"? She questioned to herself. After all she now had the task of bringing up her two children alone and being the only one who could bring money into house, as the family were not particularly rich. She has all of this to contemplate on top of the own personal grief she was feeling, for she naturally loved her husband with all heart and would now miss him greatly. Once again she asked herself "How can I now sleep in that bed"? The bed she used to share with him. Surrounding her in their bedroom were all his belongings and different parts of his character, as she went into the room she could still smell the scent of him on the pillows. She climbed onto the bed that just a few hours before they had both been happily sharing, never in this life would she again be able to touch her husband, kiss him or make love to him--this filled her with sadness and pain; she was devastated for her children, but also distraught for herself. "How could G-d take him away so soon?" She again thought, "what had he ever done"? He was such a good man and loving father, he didn't deserve to be taken away so abruptly. She continued to cry for a little while and then realized that both Pepito and her daughter were downstairs and also in need of her reassurance, Pepito was trying to be strong but she needed to be their in support of her children--despite the overwhelming pain and grief that she felt for the loss of her husband.

Little did she actually know that Pepito was in contact with Lucy [the devil] and that he had introduced his little sister to her, if she did she would naturally be dismayed. As an adult she would have been able to see that this spirit creature that took on the shape of a small girl was not be trusted and was leading her son, and now her daughter, astray. Pepito had made it absolutely clear to his little sister that they were *not* to talk Lucy to their mother or tell her about what this devil, that they were viewing as some kind of saviour, had told them. It seemed that Pepito had forgotten about all the things that he had learned in the Bible and that Lucy was an evil influence. How could he be aware that she was the devil and yet still interact with her and adhere to her commands? He has promised himself that he would not again be taken it or manipulated by this evil spirit but he was allowing himself to be exactly that.

The day was naturally going very slow, Pepito, his little sister and his mother were all sat in the living room; silence had overcome all of them and the reality of not having their father there was just beginning to penetrate the children. Pepito thought to himself: "My Papi, I miss him...why did this have to happen to us?"

Again, it was never the case that their father had been absent or had not given them the love that they required; for he did in every way, he was always there for them to provide them with love and offer them support and guidance. He truly loved his children and his wife with all of his heart, which made the experience of losing him all the more saddening. No longer would they have that loving father, who took an interest in their hobbies, spent time with them, and tucked them into bed at night. Pepito kept thinking about what life would be without him, which is both what his little sister and mother contemplated as well--things would of course never be the same and the only thing they could do for the time being is cope, and try to manage things. Pepito realized that he should be there for his mother and sister, and try to deal with his grief to the best of his ability.

Still in the living room, Pepito's mother decided she should try to break the silence and discuss the situation with her children. "How are you feeling both"? She asked, it rather seemed like an obviously silly question but she was stuck at what else to say and thought she should encourage them to be open about their emotions. "Sad" said the little sister, "I miss Papa", at this point tears came once again into the mothers eyes and she opened her arms wide for the little girl to come in. She hugged her and said "it's okay my little chica, everything will be fine." Before comforting her with the words that: "Papa is in heaven now, and I promise you will see him again one day". Of course she did not know this definitively, but she hoped it would be the case for all of them and that there was indeed a heaven--or at least some kind of afterlife. Maybe it was the end in this world, but it wouldn't be the end in the next. Along with cuddling her mother and feeling her warmth, this made the little girl feel a bit better. She now did not ever want to let go of her, she was the only parent she had left and her feelings of vulnerability, confusion, and loss were made more bearable when receiving her mothers love.

Pepito looked at them both, and his mother also asked him to come over. He was not generally used to showing his emotions in an outwardly way and tried his utmost to keep them under control here, but he at least thought that he should go and be with his mother and sister and share in their grief a little; grief that he also had, but wanted to hide.

The evening drew closer and none of the family had really ate anything all day, the mother was still not hungry and couldn't even think of food for herself--but she knew that she should feed her children and make sure they aren't without. As expected, neither of them were really hungry but she cooked a little something regardless. They both sat down at the table and she got them some drinks before presenting their food. Normally, they would both devour it but this time was obviously very, very different. For they were missing that one person who was always at the table with them; their loving father. The children managed a few mouthful's of food, knowing that they'd at least have to eat something. On the whole however, they simply just played around with their plates not able to show any full interest due to lack of appetite.

"I'm not hungry", Pepito said. "It's okay sweetie, you don't have to eat it all". The little said looked at her mother as if to say the same and she cleared their plates. "You can both go and watch some television if you like" or "maybe you would like me to read you a book"? She very much wanted to take their minds off things and give some kind of distraction. They went to look at the television for a little while, and bedtime soon approached. The mother realized that they'd probably both have trouble sleeping [though they were emotionally tired] after what had happened so decided to take up some milk for them, she would start off reading the little girl a little story and told her that "everything will be okay, you must get some sleep though honey". After that she kissed her on her forehead and watched the child's eyes tire, "mama" the girl said, "si baby"? "can I have the light on tonight"? Usually neither her or her husband would allow this but an exception would be made this time. She hugged the girl tight and said "buenas noches", "see you in the morning".

She then went into her sons room, gave him his milk and sat herself down on his bed. "Would you like me to read you something now?", "Si, por favor mama". And she read him his favourite book. Pepito was not ready to sleep yet but he could see that after over 50 pages his mothers eyes were also looking tired, after today she was exhausted. "It's okay mama, you should sleep now...I will too". "Are you sure Pepito"?, "Si I'm sure", he then put his hand on his mothers and looked at her lovingly. "Ok, buenas noches my nino", and she kissed him goodnight and left his room. Pepito was okay about being in the dark, he decided that he should try and get some sleep so he closed his eyes.

Then, he felt the cold air come into room and knew that it could only be one thing; Lucy. He wished her to go away as he knew how evil she was. But she wouldn't, he in fact felt the room get colder and colder. He then switched his light on and saw her figure staring down at him, without the usual grimacing expression. "So have you thought some more about what I've said", "boy"? He then replied in a lowered tone: "No, I haven't!", "and I will not think about it", you are evil...I know you are the devil and must get you out of my family and mine's life".

"Oh, you will never to do that", "I have full control over you now, you will believe and do whatever I tell you". Which she said while widening her smile. "No, I will never do what you tell me to do again", "my life has fallen apart since you appeared to me...and I can't let you destroy it anymore." She was now realizing the determination in his voice and concluded that she would have to up her game to re-again that control over him. "If you don't do what I tell you , I will hurt more of your loved ones".

"No!" said Pepito before he even had the chance to say anything else, "yes little boy", "shall I pay a visit to your little sisters room now?

"You will do no such thing", he replied. "How will you stop me?", she said. The boy thought for a little while and knew G-d was the only way to prevent her from causing any more damage.

He closed his eyes and prayed, "please G-d, please make her go away, please I beg you G-d". Indeed he was truly crying for G-ds help and knew he needed at this moment. He then began to feel his strength grow a little and his faith in G-d was again renewing itself.

"Get out of my room, now!", leave this house immediately, devil". Had he not been saying it with the command of G-d, it may have ended up a different story...
Debate Round No. 3


mfigurski80 forfeited this round.


It seems Con has forfeited too, but nevertheless I will continue to round four:

Pepito awoke from his sleep, it seems the events of that previous day and the visited from Lucy had actually made him sleep well. Another thing that it meant was that he was successful that evening in ridding himself of Lucy and getting her out of his room, Pepito again realized that the only way he'd be able to get Lucy out of his home, and moreover--his life, forever would be through continued belief in G-d and Christ, they were all he could place his trust in and rely on to overcome Lucy and her wicked ways.

Naturally Pepito was aware of the fact that she would try again to tempt him and would not give up easily, but he was prepared to keep on fighting and manage whatever this evil spirit had to throw at him. She would make it her aim to keep pursuing him, but he would make it his to absolutely resist her.

Pepito had a shower and got dressed, then went down stairs to see his family as he would usually do. The only difference this time was that the man that had always been in his life, his father, was not there. The reality once more occurred to Pepito, though the pain was a little more nuanced than the day before--it was still extremely difficult to comprehend what had happened and to fully envision life without his beloved father. He approached the kitchen and said "buenas dias" to his mother and little sister, who herself still looked rather bewildered at the whole thing. "Hola Pepito", said his mother, "sit yourself down...I've made some breakfast". She was still consumed with grief over losing her husband, but she had children to take care of and responsibilities to fulfill.

"Si madre", said Pepito. His appetite was still not particularly large but he knew he'd have to eat something after yesterday. Likewise the little sister managed to have her usual breakfast, though not as excitedly as she would normally do.

This was actually a Sunday so neither of the children had school to attend, and the mother wondered exactly what they would do to occupy the day. "At least if they were at school, it would take their minds of things" she thought. Either way, she decided it would be good for them to go for a walk and then visit some relatives. So that was how they spent most of their Sunday, the walk enabled them all to get of the house and reflect a little; while being with family provided some beneficial interaction. As expected they were also extremely upset, but it was good for them all to talk about matters. Obviously practical issues like a funeral would have to be planned--and they were more than willing to give their support to Pepito's mother.

As they driving home and the dark night was approaching, Pepito again thought of Lucy: "what if she visits me again this evening", he questioned. He was actually beginning to get scared of the prospect of Lucy making another appearance because now more than ever he knew precisely how evil she was (Lucy was the devil after all) and what her intentions were--to destroy him and his family. More importantly, Pepito knew how determined she would be to accomplish than. "What if she does more bad things'?, and: "what if she hurts my mother or my little sister'?, he worried to himself. The threat that Lucy made the evening before about harming his little sister struck Pepito's memory and on the way home he could not stop thinking about it. He knew how powerful the devil was, and the kind of damage that *it* could cause.

They arrived back home and the mother asked Pepito and his sister if they wanted to watch a film to give them something other than their father to think about, the sister said "yes, can I pick which one?" while Pepito said that she needn't' worry and that he was "feeling tired", to which to mother responded: "okay Pepe, you should get some more sleep then". Pepito was in fact very tired but he mainly decided to go up to his room because he knew he wouldn't have the ability to concentrate on a film (or any other forms of "entertainment", for that matter) because he simply not take his mind off Lucy. He was anticipating her evil presence again tonight and wanted to be as prepared as possible for it. "I cannot let her win", he reassured himself.

He got into his room and began to read the Bible once more, going over all of his favourite passages and specifically the ones that were relevant to what he was experiencing with Lucy. He needed to exercise his faith and ensure that he was close to G-d in that evening, so read and re-read verses over and over; memorizing them and taking them all into his heart. The night soon grew and his mother and little sister were already asleep in their beds. Pepito wondered for a while why his mother hadn't said "goodnight", and then realized it was most likely because she thought he was asleep and was extremely tired herself.

Pepito placed the Bible onto his bedside and then decided to pray. He knelt down to the floor and asked for G-ds strength in defeating Lucy, "please G-d, I need your guidance". As with the first time he had turned to G-d for help, Pepe was feeling as faithful and as close to the L-rd as ever and reminded himself that he needed to stay true and devoted to the almighty G-d.

After praying, he shut his eyes to go to sleep. Around three hours later however, Pepito was awoken by a large sound in his bedroom. He got up out of his bed immediately and saw then his windows were somehow fully open--with the howling wind swishing his curtains around, he then began to feel that icy cold presence once again. He knew that she was there.

He quickly switched his light on to see if I could see her figure, no--she surprisingly wasn't there. Usually when Lucy was within his room, she'd show herself to him and go out of her way to absolutely taunt him but tonight for the first time she wasn't. This confused Pepito and he thought to himself: "what's going on?, where is she"? Her presence was there but no viewable figure was. This made Pepito *very* anxious and stood wondering for a minutes on as to what he would do, "shall I just go back to bed and wait until she leaves"? Realistically Pepito knew that she wouldn't leave without a playing with him more but he sincerely did not know what else to do.

So he kept his light on and got back into bed, "just go to sleep"...he told himself, "everything will be fine in the morning and G-d is looking after you". Indeed he still felt close to G-d and wanted to maintain that as much as he could. So instead of thinking of Lucy and her evil presence, he thought of Him and His light. This helped Pepito feel more secure and not be as frightened as he was when he woke up.

Then, he began to hear knocks in his wardrobe...about three at each time. *knock, knock, knock* he would listen to each one and the fear started to arise again. For these weren't frantic or excitable knocks, they were slow and incredibly sinister. "Oh no, she's really not going to leave me alone tonight", he concluded.

Pepito contemplated on what exactly was the best action to take, instead of trying her usual method which was to seduce and tempt him...she had took upon herself to try and scare him to submit and present herself as the thoroughly evil being she was.

He brought his bed covers up to face and just wished for her to leave, "please, "please", he kept thinking to himself. "What did I ever do to you"? "Why are you trying to destroy me"? Obviously there was no logical answer; that was simply what the devil enjoyed doing. Pepito was an innocent boy who was fair game for Lucy--she wanted to corrupt him and fill his young soul with evil.

Again, "what can I do to be rid of her" suddenly occurred to Pepito that panicking (though understandable) was not the way to go and was exactly what Lucy wanted. She wanted him to be terrified; and hoped he would give into her.

"But no, I cannot be scared". As this thought penetrated his mind, he felt that cold presence burst on top of him. Out of nowhere he had this enormous pressure on his chest and could not breathe, Pepito felt like he was being suffocated and gasped as he struggled for air. Then he felt his bed move and his arms, without him even controlling them, somehow ended up on his neck; and there NO thing he could do to take them off. In his mind he was still present but in physical body, there was something else there. This presence continued to tighten its grip and force itself into Pepe--leaving him powerless and out of control. In his mind he tried to envision Christ and think of holy things, "Oh Jesus, please help me." He then tried to move his arm and get it away from his neck and grab the Bible, still thinking of Jesus and mentally praying for his help, Pepito was able to let go of the grip a little and take the Bible in his hands.

"Go away, you devil!"...he thought, as he was still not able to speak. "Get out of my body and leave me alone". Every time Pepito tried to utter these words he just couldn't, his whole body was locked in the control of the devil and though he could still think as Pepito--he could *not* talk as him.

Even so he tried his utmost to place the Bible on his chest or at least have it right next to him. All he had to do was keeping thinking of Christ and then the devil would eventually leave. Pepito struggled and struggled until suddenly the presence came from out of and off his chest, but then he felt something pull at the end of his bed. Just like it was trying to drag him off; and it was. "Oh no, please", Pepito was able to speak this time. He then came right off his bed as the devil pulled at his legs, after that he felt his head crash right into his wardrobe which was situated opposite him. *Bang*, then...all of a sudden, the wardrobe began to fall--Pepito had to get up before it would come down straight on him.

He moved quickly and then the entire thing came crashing down to the floor--naturally awaking his mother and sister.

What was he to do now?
Debate Round No. 4


My fingers dug into the carpet as I listened for footsteps, waiting for someone to push the door open and hit the lights. Nothing. The silence after the heavy wooden wardrobe fell seemed to seep into the surrounding rooms, and everything was as still as can be. Had they heard?

It was only then that I noticed that I was shaking. I layed myself back down on the bed, and tried to calm down my nerves. The bed and my own body under the covers were steaming, and I noticed that the room felt hotter than on a summer's night. I pushed the spiderman covers off, and kicked them to the floor with my feet.

Papa would always read a story to me. He would change the voices, and act out each little pig and the big bad wolf as he huffed and puffed. Mama didn't do that. And then he would kiss me goodnight, tell me he loves me, and look for the light switch before closing the door. Every time, every since we moved in half a year ago. Except today.

I turned over to my side. The heat was unbearable; I was sweating so much that I considered taking off my shirt to sleep, but Mama wouldn't like that. I thought about God, about how blisteringly hot he was. I would've still had a burnt out hole in my PJ's where he touched me if it weren't for Lucy. Lucy, the devil. The one whom I just kicked out of my room. The one who tried to save Papa; wait, did she? I was too tired to answer my own question.

She was still here. I don't know how, but I felt it; somehow I could feel a non-existant shadow inside of a place where it couldn't possibly be. She was still here, she didn't leave when I told her to. The wall was blank, not responding to my doubts, and the temperature didn't change in the slightest way.

I tried praying to God to let me fall asleep faster, but after two "Our Father's" my eyelids managed to glue themselves together and I stopped.

Then the door opened slightly, letting in light from the corridor, and I sighed. It could only be one person, and that meant that this would be a long night.

"Pepe?" My older sister asked. "You okay kiddo?"

"Yup, I'm fine," I whisper without bothering to look at her. It was suprising to hear Julie speaking up from the door, not Lucy. I shrugged it off, and remembered to hope that she wouldn't notice the splintered wardrobe behind my bed.

"No you aren't," she said, and sat down on my bed. I looked at her. "Lucy said that you are talking to an empty wall. What happened?"

I suddenly grabbed her shoulders and sat up in my bed.

"Julie, listen. You have to get rid of her. You have got to help me get rid of her." I said. She gently brought my arms down, and looked me in the eyes. It was a rare thing for her to do, because she is so much more taller than me.

"What exactly happened?" she repeated. I looked blankly at her for a second, as if my brain was deciding to switch gears.

"She - She told me that she controlled me. A-an and that she would hurt you or Mama-a" I slowly felt the tears coming on for some unkown reason, and fought to hold them back. My voice started cracking. "And then I told her, and I asked God too. To get out, I told her." I sniffed. "And she did, but she didn;t really leave."

"Shhh...." Juliet's voice seemed to hug me through space. "Pepe?"

"Hm-mm?" I manage an inaudible sniffle.

"Did you know that God already left you?" her eyes were deadily honest. I look into them for a short second before recognizing the lie, and struggling out of her arms. "No, Pepe, stop!" she says, and holds me tighter to her own body. I stop.

"You're lying." I told her. "Mama doesn't like if you lie."

"Did Lucy ever tell you the story of Job? From the Old Testament." she asks. I struggle to recall, but I manage to picture it again. She was sitting on the bed, right after her fight with God, and her hair was still sizzling. I remembered that part perfectly. Julie watches me nod. “Do you know how Job was left alone by God so that Lucy could “test” him?” She didn't wait for me to answer. “The same thing happened to us two. According to Lucy, it started half a year ago when we were forced to move out from our new house to this older one. I met her on the first day, and slowly grew to trust her. You have no idea the things she'd helped me with since,” she pauses, and her grip loosens. “I think Lucy finally got the hang of it, and instead of “testing” us she's just showing us the truth. After what happened with Job; she was probably a whole different person after that. Besides, we aren't crazy God fanatics, she can actually talk to us.”

So?” I ask. Personally, I don't really understand where she's going. Juliet smiles in the twighlight, and releases me completely.

I've been talking to her for the past half hour, so she couldn't have been here,” she gets up off the bed, and touches my arm. “Anyway, come see what Lucy and I have managed to do in my room.” She gets up and opens the door. My alarm clock shows that it's almost eleven; Mama should be asleep yet the light is burning in the hallway. I stand up, and walk out of my room, where Julie leads me to her bedroom.

The door opens with a squeak, and Julie leads the way in. The pervasive coolness blows from her room, and I noticed for the second time that I seem to enjoy the cold that Lucy makes every time she appears. I walk into Julie's bedroom, and stand stiffly while the coolness of the air washes over me.


There. Standing in the middle of the room, Papa's silhuetted form turned away from the wall to face me. His shadow beamed when he saw me, and I ran into his open arms so that he could lift me up like he did so many times before. Julie grabbed me before I could touch him.

He's still a shadow. Don't touch, it's dangerous. And Papa? You should know better.”

Lo siento Pepito. It seems like I haven't seen you in all enternity; I almost forgot I wasn't real.” his heavy Hispanic accent wafted over the room, filling me with joy, and seeming to bend the light on the wall behind him. Wait...

I stepped to the side to get a clearer view of the wall. The very familiar silhuette of a young girl in a flowing dress and crazily long hair floated in the blue mist. Papa stepped aside to look at Lucy. Julie sat down on the bed to watch us. It was just me and her.

I couldn't have done it without their help, but it's not all yet finished,” the voice came from behind me, but I could see the vibrations as Lucy's lips moved. “Your Papa, Juliet, and even I sacrificed much for this to happen. He's here now, so enjoy the moment.” she ended, and seemed to sit down on something inside the wall as well. Papa looked surprised.

The moment? Why only 'the moment'?” Papa asked. “Don't we have enternity?”

For that I would need more human dedication and energy,” Lucy shook her head. “And after what Pepe has hallucinated I don't think I have a right to ask him.” she looked at me wearily.

What do you want?” Juliet asked for me. I almost stopped her, but then I hesitated. Do I really trust Lucy?

The wall. Nothing could be simpler, I can rebuild it afterwords and no one will find out.” she sighed. “But I need Pepe to do it; otherwise I won't have the energy to keep Papa here."



Pepe woke up that morning and reflected on the nights events, amazingly he was actually able to go to sleep after everything that had occurred with Lucy and his Juliet, his younger sister. Though he had obviously gone at a late time--in fact it was well after 5:AM when he got to sleep and he had now awoken a few hours later. Naturally he was still extremely tired but he realized that he'd have to get up and get ready for the day. The thought of Lucy, his sister, and the matter of the wall was permanently on his mind and continued to go over exactly what he would do about it. He couldn't believe what his sister had said and that she'd been taken in by Lucy.

"How could she possibly believe the things she says"?, he questioned. Additionally he was shocked at the fact that Lucy's presence had been around the family for considerably longer than he thought. As far as Pepe was concerned, she just appeared on that night a few weeks ago--so to learn that she'd been amongst them working her evil powers that long, was a huge surprise. The realization of actually seeing his father in spirit form and hearing his voice again was another overwhelming thing for Pepe, and as expected he wanted nothing more than to get to see more of him and have him there forever.

For Pepito this was the only reason why he'd give into Lucy and grant her desires. He was unsure of what to make of G-d actually turning away from him, "surely, they've just distorted the story of Job"? he thought. It occurred to Pepito that the Bible says everyone who believes in G-d has a chance and no one is beyond redemption if they have that faith in their hearts. "This has to be true, I have asked for G-ds guidance and placed my faith in Him, so why would he desert me"? he again questioned to himself.

The more Pepito thought about, the further he realized that Lucy will simply exercising her evil powers and was manipulating him and his sister. "No!" he though again, "I cannot let her do this...G-d doesn't give up on anyone who trusts and believes in Him, so he has not given up on me". Pepito then began to feel more reassured and he felt the love of G-d arise in his heart once more. "She will not get her way", he told himself. Naturally Pepito knew that the only way to successfully fight Lucy was to strengthen his relationship with G-d and make sure that he did *not* listen to a word of what Lucy says. Pepito (and especially his sister) had already made the big mistake of engaging with conversation with her (the devil) and taking her seriously. The only way Pepito could really get Lucy out of his life was by NOT having anything to do with her and by simply ignoring her when she was in his presence.

Going by the example of the previous night, in which Lucy had relentlessly taunted Pepito and caused an actual wardrobe to almost crash down on him, he knew it would be an extremely difficult task--one that could quite plausibly endanger his and his families lives. But what would be the alternative? Give into this evil spirit and thus give it more power? By building the wall that Lucy wanted, Pepito would not only be showing the ultimate disloyalty to G-d but would also be allowing Lucy to become even more powerful; if he did this, he would perhaps never be able to get away from her. Quite potentially she could assume full possession over him and have do anything she wants--his soul would end up being consumed by her and her wicked ways.

So the day went on and Pepito was absolutely determined to keep his mind solely on G-d, and other things that were of no harm to him. He did at one point think of the sheer joy of seeing his beloved father but he knew it was all part of the ploy to get him under full control, as the evening approached Pepito began to feel a certain amount of resentment grow within him. "How could she use my father like that?", "how dare that evil devil just bring him back into our home and threaten us with never seeing him again if we don't do what she says?" The anger was beginning to present itself but Pepito knew it wouldn't benefit him. He needed to stay calm and collected, but most of all connected to G-d. Submitting to unhelpful emotions would again be giving into Lucy.

It was now starting to get dark and Pepito had long since had his dinner with his mother and sister. They were all now in the living room, with the mother and sister talking and reading and Pepito just contemplating on his plan to finally defeat Lucy. "How are you, Pepe'? His mother could see that he was deep in thought and was curious on as to why, "I'm fine, madre, just tired again." Pepito then glanced over at his little sister as she knew exactly what the problem was. She looked back at him for a few seconds and then went straight back to reading the book with her mother. Pepito was anxious for the evening to progress as it would give him the chance to properly speak with his sister and tell her precisely what he would be doing. Not did he have to save himself from Lucy, he also had to save her. Lucy had quite obviously been manipulating Juliet for a *very* long time.

Pepito announced to his mother and little sister that he would be going to bed and said "buenas noches" to them both. He concluded that the best option would be to talk to Juliet when she comes upstairs. Pepito took a shower in the bathroom and relieve the tenseness that he was feeling when he all of a sudden heard a knock on the shower doors, Pepito quickly turned around to see who was there and exactly what it was but could only see the outlining of where the knock had been. He was experienced enough to know by now that it was Lucy and that she was again up for playing some games. "Just ignore it", he said to himself. He continued to shower and thought of G-d while he was doing it. "Please, I ask you again my L-rd, don't let her win." He then finished and began drying himself, before suddenly another loud *knock* and another loud *knock*, then out of nowhere the shower immediately came back on and started spraying out water.

This was absolute confirmation that she was here and *only* for one thing--to get Pepito to knock down that wall. Despite the warmth and steam that emanated from the shower, the room went completely cold and Pepito felt sudden chills within him. He knew that her icy presence was there and that tonight she would really torment him.

Within a few minutes items within the bathroom started moving around and the shower kept coming on and off. Pepito first thought to himself: "what if madre can hear?" and then considered engaging in conversation with Lucy just to get her to stop making all the noise. "No, I can't"...she will use it against me and try to manipulate me all over again.

Pepe quickly picked everything up and put each item back in its original place. Then he walked back into his bedroom, dressed himself and immediately walked to where his Bible was placed.

He started reading it and then heard his mother and sister come up to bed. He waited for a minutes for his mother to say goodnight and then quietly approached his sisters room, "Juliet, we need to talk" he whispered. She looked at him and said "I told you last night Pepito, G-d has left you and all you have left is Lucy"..."no!" he responded, "G-d does not do that to those who follow him".

Then that icy cold presence came again, only today it was in his sister's roo instead of his. "She's come to see you", Juliet said. "Go away and leave this room!" Pepe stated while trying not to alert his mother. "Why hello my boy, did you enjoy your shower?" Lucy teasingly said. She appeared in her full figure to them both and smiled at Pepe as if to taunt him, "get out of my sisters bedroom", he replied. Pepe knew that *talking* with her may not be the best idea but he was stuckk at what else to do.

Before he knew it the windows opened and furniture within the room again began shaking, "Pepe, do something, what is happening?" Juliet alarmingly said. "Shh, just try to ignore it...we cannot wake Madre". Pepe stood their as the cold air came in and the furniture basically started to move around. "Just think of G-d and everything will be fine", he told his sister.

For the first time Pepe was actually not scared of Lucy, "if I get rid of all my fear. she will leave us" he finally realized. He once more told Juliet to do the same and not to even think of Lucy. "We are never going to talk to her again, do you understand me"? He said sternly, when his sister failed to answer he abruptly shouted: "I said to YOU understand me?", his sister nodded and said "yes, Pepe, I understand".

"It doesn't matter if she tries to show us our father, Juiliet, she is with G-d now and we must accept it."

Pepe went to shut the windows and make sure each piece of furniture was in place. Then...the bed began to shake as it did with him the other night, "Oh, Pepe, stop it"....."why is it doing this", his sister said worryingly. "Shh, it's okay, I told you to ignore her."

And she did, after a while the bed stopped shaking and everything else in the room was fine. "Lets pray", Pepe told Juliet. The two of them closed their eyes and prayed to G-d. Juliet specifically prayed for his forgiveness and support in not allowing herself to be used by Lucy again, "I am sorry G-d", she whispered gently.

Soon all that fear she had felt had subsided, for it all made perfect sense, Lucy feeds off is her driving force! If the two of them were to let go of their fear and stay close to G-d, everything would be okay and He would protect their family.

He would simply not allow Lucy to harm Pepe, his sister, or his mother. The damage that she had caused was over and they were free to move on. Once again, all they had to do was keep the faith and dismiss Lucy. They were to let go of their father, and not build the wall that Lucy had so very wanted.

Pepe had at last got rid of the spirit, she was out of the room and everything had returned to normal--it would stay that way for good.
Debate Round No. 5
15 comments have been posted on this debate. Showing 1 through 10 records.
Posted by 9spaceking 3 years ago
I think Emily was just a tad bit better.
Posted by Emilrose 3 years ago
Lol what?

Stupid purple circle.
Posted by Aragon 3 years ago
Posted by Burls 3 years ago
I'm looking forward to your next installment con.
Posted by mfigurski80 3 years ago
Okay burls, please stop. You aren't helping the debate, and neither are you helping my partner or myself.

I think you got your message across quite clearly, and ranting on won't make anyone accept it. It's in your best interest not to reply, it'll boost your credibility.
Posted by Emilrose 3 years ago
Prophetic? You really are hilarious, retard.
Posted by Burls 3 years ago
Don't let my prophetic comment hinder your creative endeavor Con.
Posted by Emilrose 3 years ago
You really are a retard if you think you're in a position to determine *anything* relating to my life and character.

Go work on your own debates.
Posted by Emilrose 3 years ago
Shut up, you idiot.
Posted by Burls 3 years ago
Because life amends character.
No votes have been placed for this debate.