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  • The entire universe revolves around cheese its

    First of all, as an astronomer, I have seen the center of the universe, and it is a large collection of cheese its boxes of all the different types:

    Baby Swiss
    Cheddar Jack
    Mozzarella
    White Cheddar
    Hot and Spicy
    Four Cheese
    Colby
    Provolone
    Pepper Jack
    Asiago
    Whole Grain
    Extra toasty
    Basic
    Grooves
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    As you can see here, the entire universe is cheese its, owes its existence to cheese its, and here is my explanation;
    Cheese its are a complex, sophisticated snack that is only eaten by the highest of society, while Ritz crackers at eaten by paupers and criminals on a budget. Meanwhile, we, the higher class of the universe, have cheese its, a great snack that helps us function in our everyday life. Anyone who tells you different from what I have written is a murderer on as many drugs as you can think of, AND drunk. Destroy anyone who tells you other than the positivity of cheese its' existence, and call 911 as soon as you can!

    Run this through a binary converter and then a base 64 converter: 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  • Cheese Its are a Gift From God Himself.

    Cheese its are the best snack and or only dined on my the most sophisticated people. Everyone who thinks Ritz are better are low class people with taste for anything. Now Cheese Itz have taken more forms than RItz. Cheese itz can be found in grooves, parmesan, cheddar, and more forms. Now Cheese Its are better because they have more depth in flavor and have the most exquisite design.

  • Cheese should be illegal

    Vegans are scum but not as scummy as cheese eaters. Ritz is the holy grail of food created by God. Everyone knows the 11th commandment "THOU SHALL NOT EAT CHEESE", God destroyed Sodom and Gomorrah because they ate cheese and they thoroughly deserve their time in hell. As evidenced by the esteemed Chubb and Moe (https://www.Brookings.Edu/book/politics-markets-and-americas-schools)

    Posted by: sssb
  • This heretical chicanery shall cease.

    Taste ritz, they are nice. Cease this chicanery.

    The fact that any particular person and or persons would deny the sanctity of Ritz hereby places upon their own person or persons the charges of heresy, the punishments of which, according to the legal code and the Bible and other authoritative books of scientific importance.

    Your chicanery is intolerable and aimed at sowing discord within the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland, in addition to her majesty's dependencies.

    I shall give you warning now that the right honorable Jacob Rees-Mogg, particularly in aid of and by Sixtus Dominic Boniface Christopher Rees-Mogg shall not tolerate these intolerable hate crimes against Ritz.


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