We live in a society with other people, If they think I'm a criminal they will put me in jail, If they think I'm a doctor they will respect me, If they think I'm cool they will want to be around me, If they think I'm funny I could earn money as a comedian, If my boss thinks I'm a good employee he may promote me, The way I present myself and my CV could mean the difference between a job and rejection.
People saying "no" are mad that some people treated them poorly or say there will always be people who judge or hate you. I don't think we should make a generalizations out of a few bad situations. There will always be conflict, You don't have to please everyone, In fact you don't have to people please to get respect, And you don't have to care what everyone thinks, But you should care about having a good image for the right people if it helps you to get what you want.
Ask yourself: Does it help me to care what this person thinks? Does it help you to care what your boss thinks about you? Yes, For your salary and job. Does it help you to care what your family thinks? Yes, Due to respect and for good relation with them. Does it help you to care what people who care what you think think? Yes, If they care what you think it means they value you. Does it help you to care what your co-workers think? Yes, So you can get along. Caring what other people think allows you to adjust your behaviour so they will like you so that you will have a more fulfilling life because of it.
But there's a limit, You should care what other people think as long as it's beneficial to you. If it doesn't help you, It's bad. You should care about your image. But if caring what X thinks makes you feel bad instead of allowing you to have better relations with him then you shouldn't care what X thinks. If caring what other people think stops you to focus on the things that matter in life then you shouldn't care what other people think. If peer pressure makes you feel bad then you shouldn't do it. Having a good image is beneficial, But having a fake image that you need to maintain does more harm than good.
In short, We need to do our best to progress towards the stage where we acknowledge the importance of what others think while preventing it from controlling our lives.
Although i agree that others opinions can trap you, and that what you think should always come first, to a certain point, it is necessary to care about what others think of you. When you are applying for college, or a job, do you care about their impression of you? I'm not saying not to be yourself, but if you don't care what people think of you, why bother convincing them that you are responsible, hard working, ect.? But the truth is, these things are important. In order to give yourself opportunities in life, caring about opinions is necessary.
If I wanna ask a question about "Seinfeld," then I could. Don't censor me or bar me from talking about it. I could give a rats ass about some people's opinions about to me to be honest. It's mostly people who think this is Sodahead in their little dreams and that they're gonna do something to me if I don't stop asking the questions I want. They live in a little Jim Crow lalaland, which isn't gonna happen in the real world.
The fear of sharing your thoughts is a sign that you're a people pleaser, That you're controlled by the opinions of others. The addiction to the approval of others is the most common destroyer of happiness. It is a dangerous trap to be concerned with what others think of you. The desire to get the approval of other people is a legitimate need in your life, You need the approval of others in your life, You just don't need it to dominate your life.
There's nothing wrong with wanting to please your parents or wife, Theres nothing wrong with wanting to be liked, Loved and approved by friends or neighbors. Actually you need that amount of approval. If you don't care at all about pleasing other people you're a narcissist.
But, You cannot be worried about what everybody else wants you to be and focus on what you want you to be at the same time. Do not follow the crowd in doing what's wrong, In what areas of your life are you doing what you know it's wrong in order to win the approval or avoid the rejection of other people?
Trying to please everyone we start to wear masks, We become chameleons, We adapt to our environment and few things are as exhausting as trying to figure out which masks you're trying to wear in front of which people in which context. When we wear masks, We fake it, We pretend, We don't reveal our authentic selves, Our true selves. We just love to make ourselves look better than we are. Be congruent inside and outside regardless of what context you're in, Not full of duplicity, Not wearing masks.
How to break free of caring what other people think? You change your mind, Change the way you think. When you have a fear of disapproval, Conflict, Rejection or are overly worried what other people think then all kinds of crazy makes are going to run over your life, They're gonna dominate your life. Remember this: Nobody can please everybody, Going through life people are going to disapprove of you, Accept it, You cannot please everyone, If everybody likes you it means you stand for nothing, You have no conviction, You have no beliefs.
Some people are unpleaseable, It's not your problem, It's their problem, You're not going to get their approval but the good news is you don't need everyone's approval to be happy. If you're looking for one human being to meet all your needs you're going to disappointed, Only you can meet all your needs. If you are looking to any human being to make you happy you're going to be unhappy most of your life.
Be yourself, Don't let the word squeeze you into its own mold, Only change yourself when you yourself want to change, Whoever likes you fine, Whoever doesn't like you also fine. You only have to please one person, Yourself. You want to learn to live for an audience of one.
I've been made fun of cause I don't have the latest clothes or shoes but to me it's so sad they care about this. These people are the dumb faggots in class who won't even get anywhere in life but will spend their life like a retard. Faggots all of them
There will always be people who will judge you for whatever reason. You simply cannot satisfy everyone. As long as you care about what others think about you, you are not free, and freedom (from my point of view) equals happiness. It all comes down to what YOU think about yourself. One should always compete, but compete with oneself, trying to become the best he can. Other people's opinions can only affect you as much as you let them.
There will always be someone who doesn't like you or things you annoying, stupid, tuck up...If you let these people and their opinions of you weigh on you too much you are their prisoner. If you focus to much on what they think you will never have a positive self image. What matters is what you think of yourself.
Because honestly, all the Internet has taught me is that no matter what I do, who I am, or what I support, there will still be people who hate me. There will be people who find the silliest things to pick at or mock. There will be people who have gotten it into their heads to dislike me; you can't dissuade those people.
And for the people who aren't like that, and believe they have 'legitimate reasons' to dislike me - well, why should I care? Honestly, I don't let their thoughts/opinions bother me. I know myself better than they do, and so I'll trust my own judgment. It doesn't hurt to ask for opinions and remain openminded, but I remind myself that they're just that - opinions. They don't matter in the end.