In order to direct a child who is ignorant of the world's realities and unable or unwilling to depend on the reason of an adult, there must be a deepset belief in the power and authority of the parent. The belief that reason alone can work on a two year-old or on a teen in the midst of a hormone-driven freakout is naïve. There must be a basic belief in the authority of t the parent, but sooner or later, (almost always by three years old) the child questions that authority and rebels against it. To back up that authority, there must be minimum amount of fear in the mind of the child. At its base that fear is the fear of violence. Ideally that fear is instilled early and called to mind only rarely. If the first spanking is done correctly, a second one is not as likely to be required.
This is the unhappiest part of parenthood: that our relationships with our children include the basic vertebrate dominance-submission behaviors. We want all nurturing to be love and trust and sharing of knowledge and experience. Unfortunately, nurturing to healthy adulthood includes authority, and the power that enables the parent to protect the child from himself/herself. At the beginning, mindless and unquestioning obedience is necessary to live past five years old (unless the kid is to be physically isolated from the rest of the world.) As the child grows and learns, the number of situations that require mindless and unquestioning obedience decreases.
As this happens, the parents' role gradually shifts from that of protecting the child from the world, to that of also protecting the world from the child. This includes instilling thoughtful respect of law and authority, and the appertaining rights and needs of other. If the child does not come to recognize and accept that his/her place in society requires restraint and responsibility, and moreover, if the child does not BEHAVE in accordance with this requirement, then that authority must be supported as a reality in the mind of the child. Again, one of the requirements of this is an understanding that ALL authority is ultimately rooted in violence or the ability to use violence as a lever. Corporal punishment may be required to instill this understanding.
I am not only saying that corporal punishment is an acceptable parenting tool. I am also saying that in many cases, the refusal to spank constitutes gross negligence on the part of the parent. While spanking is not useful all by itself, neither is talking reasonably. Both must be applied judiciously. All kids will do what is good for them when told to IF they believe that it is good for them to do what they are told. Sometimes their backsides must be convinced along with their minds.
I am going to use myself as an example in this case. When I was a kid and started getting out of control and disobeyed my parents, they would smack me. If I continued to be rebellious and not listen to their rules and regulations, I either got spanked, or I got whipped with a belt if I pushed became physical in any way. Did I learn my lesson? You're damn right I did! Was I ABUSED? No. Physical and mental abuse are completely different from discipline. So what is discipline?
The practice of training people to obey rules or a code of behavior, using punishment to correct disobedience.
Now, what is disciplinary action?
Of, relating to, or used for discipline and Organized activity to accomplish an objective (which eventually can lead to) The causation of change by the exertion of power or a natural process ( which means the use of necessary physical force depending upon the severity of the issue).
What is abuse? To use wrongly or improperly. And no. Using physical force isn't abuse unless improperly as it states...To hurt or injure by maltreatment; ill-use.
What is Psychological abuse? Psychological abuse, also referred to as emotional abuse or mental abuse, is a form of abuse characterized by a person subjecting or exposing another to behavior that may result in psychological trauma, including anxiety, chronic depression, or post-traumatic stress disorder
Though, there is a problem with this. Why? Anxiety is normal when someone does something wrong. Therefore, if someone doesn't experience anxiety after doing something malicious, harmful, oppressive, or anything of these natures, then discipline is needed and anxiety needs to be felt by the rebellious kid. This being said, here is the proof...Check out the comments because my comment is too long to fit in this answer.
To say that this should be the first method for disciplining a child would be absurd, but at some point, the child must understand that what is said is what will happen. Marcusmoon put it more elaborately, but if you start out on the right path for raising them, it is not likely that it would be needed, but it should remain as a final option
People believed that when you spank a child that is is abuse and harmful to the child's future, I disagree. When a child does something wrong, they should be punished, and timeout does not always work because the child may be very rebellious and will try to go against your command but if you spank them they will respect you more.
This is real life here. Nothing a kid does is as bad as a parent hitting their kid and practically saying that they hate their own child. It's practically abuse. Hitting kids with paddles/rulers? It's modern day, not 100 years ago when parents would murder their own kids. I mean seriously.
These are your children! Why would you hurt them when there are other ways of encouraging good behaviour? Why would you hurt them when it doesn't even work? I was punished as a child and learnt that I had to hide things from my mother otherwise I would get punished! Fail!
Truly we have found that corporal punishment has its effect in teaching children about repercussions, but this way teaches us the only way to deal with disobedience can only be solved by violence. Is that the generation we are raising? The victims of violence are more likely to make more victims, thus the cycle restarts. So in turn we are making another generation of violent people, people who will run the world, convince others that violence is the way to deal with our problems.
Secondly children can be talked to about misbehavior, they are not incapable of the comprehension of small matters. They are people.
Thirdly, children have a learning curve, thus they can learn from their mistakes without corporal punishment. We are humans, at the earliest stages of any civilization, someone had to learn on their own and it was more efficient when being punished physically. Besides people know when do know something wrong when for foreshadowing or seeing results.
Conclusion: Corporal punishment is unnecessary, inefficient, unintelligent, and most of all cruel.
I grew up with corporal punishment (always accompanied by very rational conversation with my mom about what I had done wrong). I always understood what was happening to me. She never hit me out of anger or with bare hands (usually used a ruler). And I promise I turned out just fine. Really. I'm not crazy. I don't have low self esteem. I have a healthy and close relationship with my mom. And I'd never use the word "beat" or "beating" to describe the way my mom used corporal punishment.
Having said that... I have two boys, and I have never physically punished them. And I intend on never doing it. I don't believe that I have to hit them or make them suffer physically to teach them. I'd hate to see them in this kind of pain. And I hope other parents don't do it. BUT I also don't like that some people making arguments against this practice using words like "beating". I suppose some parents may beat their children but i don't think it's fair to use "beating" and "corporal punishment" as synonyms. They're not the same thing.
Punishing your kids through corporal measures is a very ignorant way of going about things. The child will learn that hitting is a form of superiority and will use it against others if they wanted to. Not to mention that the children will be very separated from your parents. Unless you want 20 plus years of wasted parenthood, only to have your children resent you, then by all means go for it!
Beating/corporal punishment used as a parenting method is a very controversial topic. In my opinion, it does not encourage obedience and good-behaviour, but rather makes the child fear their parent(s), and I know of many children who were brought up in a house such as this, and many have turned violent themselves. We always teach 'Violence is not the best answer', so why should violence to children be okay, even if it is as a punishment?
What do you guys think they're in the army or something? If you punish your children like this, then you're a tool. Kids need to be filled with love not hate. Let the school and state punish them, and parents can stop acting like military police! It causes more violence than video games does.