See, This is a classic example of selfish or selfless. I have a sister who is a very selfish person. She will only do something if it benefits her. She will do stuff for others but only if she gets something from it. It's hard to be around. Like she will always get lipstick on the glasses she drinks from and it stays till washed by hand. So I asked her if she would simply rub it off before putting it in the dishwasher. Her response, "Well I don't mind it. " Me: "But I do" Her: "So? ". The thing is, Not caring about others is simply selfish. And most people HATE being around selfish people.
A house divided is considered no house at all. Only if the intertwined individuals support each other and look out selflessly for each other can a society be truly strong and achieve the pinnacle of human morality. Selfishness by nature is a destructive and insolent gesture of rebellion; and those who espouse it are enemies of the people.
The ultimate insult to the benevolent creator would be to profane the nature of the creation(s). Humanity in order to achieve total perfection must only adopt sustainable ideologies. A house whose boards don't support each other suffers structural corruption and will collapse inevitably. By being selfish; one is sowing division and becomes an enemy of the people. By putting the interests of humanity first always; one achieves the absolute maximum of what a human can achieve and adopts a perfect pillar of civility that constitutes an essential part of one's honor; whom bestows upon one value. It's a shame that so many are not only unintelligible; but lack the esteem and uprightness to shun unsustainable and self-destructive ideologies.
Others come first always. Fabric unwinds if the yarn/thread does not offer mutual support. Only a mutually supporting society free of degenerates and deviants can achieve a perfected people(s). Putting one's own interests first is not sustainable and reveals the opportunistic nature of that person; the inclination and ideology of a insolent parasite. The only fate for them is to be relegated to the box for inferiors.
If one seeks the reward first; he/she will have risk of performing the duty inadequately. This is the ideology of an opportunist; that's why they make such poor leaders. A selfless and perfection personified individual will not seek the reward first; the duty comes first; and even if the reward is not bestowed; he/she will be willing to fulfill the duties regardless. That is one of the pinnacle achievements that humans can accomplish. Selflessness is sustainable too!
*disclaimer; don't help those that don't deserve it
Don't seek happiness to achieve happiness. Seek the happiness of others, And you will be rewarded accordingly because there is a just God. A perfect general does not fight wars to win medals and shiny trinkets; he/she fights wars to win them; and to preserve as many lives of the men/women under his/her command as possible while doing so. Perfect parents don't have children as a monetary investment; they have children as a social investment. The reward is not to be expected; and is not your decision whether it is bestowed upon you or not. You are not to seek the reward. Seek the task; and the reward will be allocated according to your efforts and convictions. Kicking degenerates to the curb and letting them perish is in the interest of society as a whole; and so it is not selfishness at all contrary to what some may think. Saving and selflessly serving those in an undeservedly dire predicament is true selflessness. Happiness comes later after the task is done. No reward until task is completed. When duty is fulfilled; the happiness is the reward and not the aim.
If the "other" in question is a degenerate, Then the righteous individual outranks it and is obligated to put the one with value first; which is the righteous individual. If the "other" in question is a decent individual with a moral compass and value; then absolutely one is required to care more about others than oneself; only by being selfless and acting in the interests of others that "DESERVE" it, Can one be truly happy. If they don't deserve anything; kick the worthless ones to the curb. If they do deserve it; you are expected to lay down your life for him/her/them and more.
Putting others above yourself will definitely lead you to sacrifice your life you deserve to enjoy, Which will result in overwelming you, Only to feel despondent especially when others never appreciate good will. Only the glass filled with water can overflow. Simlialy, When you put yourself before others and you feel content with your life, You can have the mind to help others. In this sense, Selfishness is not immoral. I am not saying the one who is willing to invade others interest to take profit. Rather, I point out the positive selfishness that is the first step to put others above yourself.
Selfishness means ‘putting your benefit in priority above others benefit’. Based on this statement, I think caring about one self's benefit in priority over others does not mean selfishness in pursuing happiness. That is because caring about others happiness means sacrificing one’s own life. Also, Since we know ourself the most, We know better what makes us happy. In addition, Chasing one self's happiness is the first step of increasing others happiness. For instance, We have to have enough money to live a normal life in order to donate. A person with poverty cannot donate to others.
Emotions, Especially bad ones, Are easily spread to people around us by you. So if you are happy or unhappy, The whole family and your close friends will be affected by you, And they will feel similar emotions you feel. So, If you want to make people around you feel happy, Then you should be happy first.
We know ourselves better than we know other people. So we are more likely to be able to make ourselves happy that we would be able to cater to the needs of others. By doing it this way, Everyone becomes happier as a result because every individuals happiness equals the happiness of the whole.
Should implies some obligation to put others happiness before your own. I will agree that in some cases it is good to put others happiness before your own, But you don't have an obligation to do so. Even if you enjoy being selfless, That doesn't mean you always have to be, And it doesn't mean that other people have to.
If putting everyone else above yourself is considered "selfless", Then most humans are extremely selfish. Of course, We are. If we weren't, We'd be at the end of the food chain. Consider little things like a love triangle in a movie. I could bet most of us have rooted for one of the love interests. If the main character was "caring about others' happiness more than their own", They would just date both of them since they wouldn't want to break someone's heart by saying no. However, Choosing one of them would be considered "selfish". This little incident says a lot about our society. I would also like to mention that like I said "most humans" previously, These people we call "selfless" are people with extremely high degrees of empathy (Level 7), And most of the times, These people are suicidal, Because they "care about others' happiness more than their own. "
If we aren't happy, Then how will the people around us be happy, Most people, Especially in a household are dependent on each other, So if one person is emotional, It is likely that everyone will get affected, Moreover, Bad vibes can easily spread, Easier than good vibes at that!