I do believe that virginity is virtue for women. It is hardest thing I have ever done.
It has made me highly sentimental and basically hold a more philosophical view of life.
Waiting until marriage is helping me to actually love myself. Sometimes I cry, and pray that I will find a nice man one day. But my tragedy is that sometimes we think that virginity alone will ensure a lasting marriage, but it is false. My mother waited until marriage, and my parents got divorced. This tragedy that happened completely distorted my view of love, that it should be sacrificial. My virginity is sacrificial, but my greatest fear is getting divorced. It is hoping for the best when you could end up with the worst.
It is guys you think are worth it rejecting you only because you won't have sex with them.
It is a 3.5 million dollar tempting bid that I wish to take. It leads to the choice of selling yourself and avoiding heartbreak, avoiding marriage.... Because who would want to marry a woman who sold herself while the whole world knows?
But virginity is also stepping into a marriage, and watching your future love life fall apart, and living a life of continuing emptiness.
My only option is to not put all of my eggs in one basket, or to not idealize marriage, but to continue finding my own personal growth and hopefully improve my relationship with god, if there really is one.
What do you do on your wedding night when you have already experienced what God has created to be between a husband and a wife? Where is the thrill, the surprise, and the anticipation. I am a girl. My parents gave me a purity ring with a promise. I would save myself for my husband someday.
If a person seriously wants to marry, then their dating experience should be focused on finding the person that they want to be with for the rest of their lives. Once you are married it is expected that you will have sex exclusively with each other and it just is more unique if your married partner just is your only sexual partner, and not one of a long line of others. It makes that sexual relationship sacred.
Yes, it's a personal choice as to whether one wants to have premarital sex, and I concede we all have free-will and the right to behave in a way we deem appropriate. However, the question does say "should", and the healthiest thing is to wait. Healthy for one's body and healthy for the potential offspring that may result. Hey! It's my opinion, though if one is an adult they can make their own informed decision.
I happen to be a practising Muslim. And I'm a guy. I earn pretty well, Live in London, And have had many opportunities with stunners. My feeling though, Is that many women, Especially in The West, Are taught to sleep around long before marriage. I actually think virginity is sacred, And so I'm saving myself to share that with the woman I eventually marry on our wedding night. I don't expect the Heavens to open! But I'd like to take that journey of discovery with the woman that I marry. As I am a Virgin, I naturally expect my wife to be one also. That way we don't have expectations of each other. Also, I don't want to be compared to countless other guys that a woman who is 'experienced' has been with. Likewise, Banging girls and walking away after a few months isn't part of the solution. Even though society seems hell-bent on ensuring that young women and men think it is. It's just not. I'll wait. And for a guy, Who's had A LOT of opportunities, It is hard. But I'll wait.
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Why? Why would you want to loose it to someone that will leave you. People say you want to see how good they are, but marriage is about sacrifices. Sex isn't the BIG thing that will choose who you marry. Marry someone you love, not for the sex. And if your boyfriend gets mad that you won't have sex with him, well be it, he is not worth your time. You want to make love to someone you love, and if you marry someone and he won't sacrifice, not the one. It is up to you.
Most people don't understand how this is a tradition but mattered because it displayed affection and endearment. Saving your virginity is a way of saying, "you found the one" and doesn't make sense for horny teen and young adults to screw anything in sight. Its also a sense of control.
Based on both sides arguments I think that i am going to save my virginity until I get married. That doesn't mean that I'm telling everyone else to do the same. I am 18, just graduated highschool, and i still believe that having a relationship let alone sex is to much of a commitment to have during highschool and upcoming college. I feel like the risk of being that one condom that broke or faulty birth control pill izs to great, because something like that can ruin you college career. Especially if you can barely afford college, imagine expenses and time put in to having a child.
I'm very into sex like I CRAVE it but I'm 17 but I'm a virgin I lost my first kiss someone who broke my heart and it was devastating because now i know that I can never get it back something as important as sexual intercourse should be saved until marriage I have a huge sex drive. It's so hard to hold it in because of sociality but I refuse to give in. Because sex will be like finding gold once you have waited long enough.
You don't want to get married and then your spouse is lousy in bed. You should get to know the person you marry in more ways than just sexual but sexual included before tying the knot. Then you can truly know they are the right person and that you will stay together.
I don't think that there is any reason to say that a person should do one thing or another. At the end of the day the decision is yours and you should make a personal choice based on what you want. You should not feel pressured in either direction as to what to do.
If somebody insists that they want to save it for marriage then hey, whatever works for you. People that don't shouldn't be looked down upon though, few people do and the number is decreasing. There's nothing morally wrong with sex before marriage if the people involved have decided that they want to do it.
I think it is all very nice to save your virginity to someone who is virgin too. But, in real life it is not like that, well most of the time. I had few platonic boyfriends and I saved myself for that special moment, for the first day of marriage. All of them wanted to sleep with me, but had to say NO. I knew they were not virgins. My believe in love and marriage was so strong, that even when my body wanted that closeness with someone, either, time wasn't right or place wasn't right. On top of that, i had no idea, had no information about sexual relations and how to be safe. Internet wasn't available to find all those information. I was quite shy and with my friends we didn't talk about things like that. On top of that I was so worried about everything. Luckily, I did meet my special person who really showed that he cared for me and then, I didn't care and wasn't that worried and my mind and body were ready. But, still felt that everyone was judging me. In reality people may talk ,judge, but who cares.. You should care less what people think.
Now, in my late 30's I regret not having more casual sex and fun and wish I didn't mix sex with love. Not to expect and think that, if you have sex with someone, that you have to marry them. It was total mistake and quite naive. Virginity is not a big deal, but I made it into a big deal. So, my advice is not be me and make same mistake. Have sex, if you trust that person and respect each other, then go for it. With someone your body wants to have closeness. Listen to your body sometimes at least. I would 100%, but be safe.
All that matters is what you believe. If your conscience tells you to wait until marriage to have sex, then you should follow it. And if you believe it's acceptable to have sex outside marriage, again it's your choice. This is not a black-and-white matter, there is no right or wrong answer.
I myself am a 17 year old female that has been with the same person for the three almost four years, we are sexually active and it has bonded us together. No I don't think you should just go have sex with anyone, but if you are emotionally connected then absolutely. Who is to tell you when you can have sex? It's nature, people hide having sex because of the "standards" being sheltered and having to hide stuff shows why so many teens get pregnant. Nobody is teaching us sexual education, I learned myself. We have sex regularly at 17 and I wouldn't change how we did anything as far as decisions. We are almost grown adults, once again it's nature. You shouldn't be forced to wait until marriage to have sex, your wedding night should be special. Not awkward and uncomfortable, it would cause such a weird atmosphere. I have not and will not regret losing my virginity to him, he's special to me and it was my adult decision. Everyone should decide for themselves instead of letting a silly ring decide for them.
Virginity is a personal choice.
Sex is presumably a choice of two consenting adults.
Remaining a virgin brings a certain reverence.
To be revered because you have remained a virgin, becomes the wrong reason to do so.
The risk is virginity becomes a prize with all the human frailties that come with it.
I married a girl because I felt guilty about taking her virginity, though she did not tell me at the time she was a virgin.
We were in our thirties, she had no right to be a virgin.
I mean cmon sex is awesome guys I'm not gonna wait a billion years to marry some ugly lady and "settle down". I'm not that kind of person, and who does it affect? Absolutely no one. I see people acting like having your virginity is the best thing that can happen, but why is it even important? It does nothing for you at all.
In fairness, the whole pureness aspect is just something that has arisen from the church. Where is there any evidence that God wants you to wait until you get married? This has stigmatised sex. There is nothing wrong or dirty with having sex with a partner that you share everything with. Whether you are married or not is completely irrelevant. All this talk of "treasuring it" and having "no guarantee that you will have connections with whom took it" is all a load of rubbish to those who think logically and aren't brainwashed by the church or other religious groups
I can understand that virginity can be important to some people and that is perfectly respectable. But saving your virginity for someone isn't for everyone and that is okay too because it's hard to wait and people have differing morals. Personally, I did not save myself until marriage and in the end that was okay for me because I was educated in protection, gave it to someone I loved deeply, and it was my choice and no one elses. It's a person's own body and they should have the choice of what they do and don't do with it as long as it's not hurting anyone else. Basically, you don't have to if you don't want to, just be sure to be safe and educated on sex if you are not ready to have children.