To what extent should a parents be able to control their teenager? A lot (Yes) or not a lot (No)?

Asked by: Penumbra
  • I believe in escalating freedom of teens as they show more maturity...

    But at the end of the day, a parent is responsible for the actions of their children, and can be held accountable for those things until a child reaches the age of majority. If a parent has no control over the teenager, how can they be held accountable for ANYTHING the teen does, realistically?

    This control can only be limited if the law disjoints this responsibility from parents.

  • Grungy angry teenagers

    Yes as teenagers we want to run our lives because we believe we know best. We're bright enough to be on our own right? Absolutely not. If we were to run free there would be so many more laws regarding anyone under 18. I honestly believe our parents are allowing us to live our lives safely and honestly to an extent because if it gets too far they are the ones accountable.

  • Depending on what we mean by a lot.

    But my child hold was very striate. And forward. And because of that I can see the difference in the way I see things. Or the way I behave.

    It does not matter how much control the parent have over there child, it all depend on the kind of life the parents life. For example, if you dad is a smoker, drinker, alcoholic and very violence. He can have extreme control of his children's. He can enforce his rules in a negative way or in a positive way.
    Both ways he is till exercising complete control. Which I think is better then having a child who does not listen, and is free to do as it wish.

    It's always better growing up in a either fearful but striate manner. Or loving and striate manner from childhood rather then to be free, no control no rules or whatsoever. Child like that grown up not respecting anyone or having any kind of sympathy toward anyone.

    If you grow up in a fearful but striate manner, you will know more about dealing with people with that kind of temper, you can choice to follow up and be just as striate and forward. Either way being having a respectful manner is always better.

  • Just because you spawned a child doesn't mean you know what's right for it.

    I believe that parents should not have as much power over their teenagers as some parents believe they deserve.

    Many parents like to believe that they always know whats best for their offspring. Becoming a parent doesn't mean that you have all the answers. Becoming a parent doesn't make you infinitely wise either.

    Many parents also like to justify their controlling attitude towards their offspring's life by claiming they have had more life experience. After all, "they were a teenager too once." Yes, they have had more life experience and yes, they were a teenager... But they were a teenager in a different time and they only have an experience of THEIR life which isn't likely to resemble the life of their offspring at all! Does that make their "experience" largely irrelevant when applying it to a different person living a different life in a different time with different ideas?

    I just struggle to understand why parents insist on having control of their teenager offspring by claiming that they know what's best... How could you possibly know that? The best person to ask is your offspring... But they are obviously far less intelligent and mindful and responsible than you and obviously are not capable of making good decisions, right?

  • They have their own life

    Childrens have their own way of life and how can anyone change their imagination on thinking. Children are the future of our world. If anyone treet them bad they also treet world badly by bomb and nuclear power cutting plants and the main reason is their imaginations are can't be changed by scolding them. Because the imagination is their mind

  • Give Teenagers Freedom!

    I feel like there should be some guidance or control over a teenager. But I also feel like without freedom, a kid will never be able to go learn for themselves, be themselves, and make mistakes on the path to becoming a better person, what life is really all about.

  • Not a lot

    A teenager should be able to make their own choices, even if they may sometimes be wrong or foolish so that they can see for themselves the consequences. It's important for a teenager to become more independent and responsible for their actions so that they are prepared for the adult world.

  • If you really care you would try!

    Parenting, what is parenting!? "Parenting is the way you give tips on your child's development for raising him or her into happy & resilient teenagers." So, in this case, it means to care for them. MAKE THEM HAPPY! If your child is not happy, you need to understand why? To know the mistakes you have made, and what you need to do to fix the situation. Many many things could distress your child and make them feel unloved. Wouldn't it feel horrible?

  • Being a parent should not mean that you own your child as a person, or that you control what rights they have.

    My personal experience is that I'm 17 years old. In my state, being 17 means you are legally accountable and can be held and tried as an adult. It is also the legal age of sexual consent; however, I just so happen to be a lesbian. Coming out of the closet for me has meant I'm not allowed to go anywhere or see anyone who would condone my "bad behavior" (being gay). Its not fair that I'm punished as a person for something that is perfectly legal.

  • Children should practice independence as soon as they're mature enough.

    Of course parents should have a strong grip on the safety, responsibility, and productivity of their children. However, many parents tend to forget what is truly safe, responsible, and/or productive. For example: pornography. There is no link to extreme harm just from the material, and nearly every younger person has weird hormones and WILL explore that field, so why punish them for doing such? Of course, however, such things require great responsibility, but shouldn't downright be banned, regardless of customs or religions. They are their own people, not your means of reputation or ethics. Children are unique, so there is no proper system already in place for any single child. Some child simply work better when not working with the conventional norm. Everything has an opportunity cost and a benefit, with every child having a different cost and benefit. Children and adults have different psychologies, so they should work differently, while following a general standard of safety.

  • Parents are just as faulty and imperfect as your typical human being

    I don't trust parents. I've learned not to trust parents. The belief that parents know what's best for you comes from the misguided idea that parents know what's best in general. That simply isn't true. Parents are just as likely to be misinformed, petty, childish, or just downright delusional.

    You could have racist or homophobic parents. You could have parents who think it's a good idea to vote Trump. You could have parents who use Reddit and whine about some liberal conspiracy. You could have parents who are just easily set off and childishly abuse their power over their children.

    That being said, Teenagers are not the bright minds that they often like to believe they are. And if somebody doesn't stop them, they will do something unbearably dangerous. As a parent, it's hard to get past our biological demands to protect our own kids from the world's bullshit, but there is absolutely a time when we have to. The problem is knowing the line. Yeah, it's probably a good idea to flat-out prevent them from tattooing racial slurs on their face... But it may be to their benefit to just let them find out on their own that speaking like a gang member when they're trying to be taken seriously isn't going to work out in most social non-gang settings.

    Personally, I think parenting needs more oversight. Parents in general have way too much control over their children, and children are often not taken seriously by the authorities. Parents need SOMEBODY they have to answer to in order to make sure that their asshole tendencies aren't affecting their children.

    The right to raise your child the way you want is superseded by the fact that said child is going to become a member of society and we'd like them to be a PRODUCTIVE member of society.

  • Let your child live their own life.

    Teens have different mind sets to adults, however I think adults and children should be treating each other with equal respect and trust. Parents are alwasy telling their kids that:"this is wrong", "you shouldn't do this", because they don't want to see their child turn bad or suffer which in turn hurts the parents themselves. But if you look at it in another way, children never restrict their parents to doing something. When parents are signing divorce papers, their children are in hurt but does that change some parent's decision? When parents are drinking all night and then vomiting in the toilet, this makes their child feel sadness, but do some adults stop being alchoholic? When parents are smoking and then dying of lung cancer, their children are also dying inside from the greif, but do some parents stop smoking? Children are not restricting you to doing what you want, so why are should you restrict them? Making mistakes are hurting both the parent and the child. So in my opinion I believe that both child and parent should both guide each other but not "control" or else you wouldn't be living your life. Your children are not stupid, they can make the right choices if you trust them, in return adults should also start thinking about their own choices and mistakes.

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