This is a touchy subject. As a black man, I can't say that I'm not sometimes aggravated when I hear white people use that word, but when black people use the word so commonly (I use it sometimes), I'm not sure I have a logical basis for that anger.
To be honest I almost never use that word. I think it is ignorant, and when I do use it it is to prove a point. I've studied the past of that word to see how it went from a racial slur to such a popular word thrown around by the very people it was meant to hurt.
I agree TBR. I wonder why the black community has embraced this word as well, but I found this article that discusses it very riveting. http://www.tolerance.org/magazine/number-40-fall-2011/feature/straight-talk-about-n-word
@geauxpelicans5 I wrote a longish response that the filter didn't like. Let me try to boil it down a bit. Some in the gay community have embraced "fa**" . That is their business, but I don't like it much more than the black community doing the same with n----r. As a member of neither group, I have a responsibility to respond when others outside the gay or black community say these things, and when faced with the "well THEY use it, I should be able to too" I have little logical response available.